


Lion's Den to Deer's Heart

by pajama_cats



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Character Death, Minor Violence, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pining, Slow Build, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-30
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2020-07-26 02:50:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 35
Words: 59,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20036680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pajama_cats/pseuds/pajama_cats
Summary: Recruited into the Golden Deer Ashe has to adapt to the new household, unbeknown as to why the professor placed him there or what was yet to come.Spoilers for the game in eventual chapters.





	1. Introductions

_ “Ashe, for now on you shall be taught by me in the Golden Deer house.”  
_

It was words spoken by the professor that had sent Ashe into a turmoil. Who  _ wouldn't  _ be shocked by that? Getting suddenly thrust into a new house was a huge deal at the monastery, considering you were placed in the house from which land you came from. He's not even sure he has the courage to write to Lord Lonato about this sudden change..

It's not as if Byleth or anyone had forced him into it. No one wanted him out of his own house either, but he did have some say on the matter. As quiet as the professor tended to be he still had quite the charisma, not to mention he was pretty skilled with a bow from what he's heard.

But why would Byleth want him? He had the  _ best  _ archer already in his class! How could he compare himself to someone well trained like Claude was? A house leader  _ and  _ a noble!  


And then looking at himself he.. He was just a former thief adopted into a minor noble family. Nothing but a mere commoner to the eyes of many, including himself. Even so it won't stop for what he has planned for the future.

Not that he knows what lies ahead for his path now.. He barely got a wink of sleep; tossing and turning with his mind filled with worry. What if his new classmates disliked him for being in another house? What if they disliked him for being a commoner?

There were too many things they could dislike about him!

“Ashe?” A soft, yet firm voice pierces his internal struggle from outside the door. Still, it's enough to startle him from the yelp that's heard.

“O-one second, professor!” Gods, what a start. He wasn't late was he? No, the professor had offered to walk him to class the day before..

.. To introduce him to his new life.

*******

The walk is rather peaceful, yet Ashe finds the quietness to be bothersome. It did nothing to calm his nerves nor was the professor one for small talk either. Did Byleth always have to look so bored? Ashe had no right to complain considering it was the professor’s usual expression..  


Ashe cringes inwardly. He really was a pessimist today.

With each step his heart hammers against his chest especially when the Golden Deer banners come into view. This was it, it was time..

Byleth opens the door and nods for Ashe to enter, who does so with led legs. The sound of idle chatter was heard, indicating everything was already lively for such an early hour. It would have brought a smile to his face if he hadn't been so nervous.

Despite that, the Golden Deer house wasn't much different than the Blue Lions. They at least had the same layout, the only obvious changes being the colors and classmates.  


“I am  _ not  _ a child! Are you sure you're supposed to be the house leader? Your ignorance has me astounded!”  


The outburst halts Ashe in his steps by the door frame watching his new classmates surround the small, white haired girl. She actually looked familiar to him.. Perhaps he's seen her in the library before? It's not an unusual place to find other students after all.

_ ‘If anyone had scolded me like that I fear I wouldn't leave my room for days.’ _

Ashe almost feels bad at whoever got such poor treatment, but.. Laughter is all he hears. Were his ears deceiving him?

“I was just thinking it wouldn't be wise for you to stay that late in the study hall is all. Especially when it's past your bedtime.” Oh Gods, she was arguing with  _ Claude _ . Her own house leader! Well..  _ Their  _ leader now. But he wasn't even phased by it. Perhaps Claude was used to it, but his humorous tone suggests such harsh insults don't pierce his armor so to speak.

“You're certainly one to talk! You're almost always in the library at night!”  


“There's nothing wrong with being a fellow bookworm, princess.”  


Byleth chooses the right time to clear his throat gathering the attention of all his students. It makes Ashe wonder if Byleth witnessed this many other times or was just now new to it like he was. It was hard to get a read on the guy.

“Oh! Hey teach, whatcha got there?” The question was directed towards Byleth yet Claude's gaze remained on him. Why did he have to look so fascinated? Nah, maybe he was mistaken. There wasn't anything too interesting about himself that would stand out.

“.. Like I mentioned to you all a few days prior to today, Ashe here will be in our house. Despite coming from a different house please treat him as one of your own. After all, he'll be in the Golden Deer for now on.”

Byleth doesn't bother sticking around after the introduction, most likely getting their assignments ready for the rest of the week. The absence of the professor doesn't help him, especially with all eyes on him.

“Welcome to the Golden Deer! I'm sure you'll fit in just fine with this group of misfits.” Claude smiles with his hands resting behind his head. He was rather laid back and carefree for a leader, but at least he appeared to be friendly.  


Either way it has Ashe smiling.

“T-thank you, I'll do my best for our house.”  


“That's a relief to hear! Laying back and cheering from the sidelines is kinda my thing.” A pink haired girls says rather happily. Was that something to be proud of..?

“Hilda, isn't that just called being lazy?” Another new face, a girl with fairly short orange hair questions. So many new faces he has yet to learn about..

“Is it? Oops, well.. Call it what you must Leonie, I still do my fair share.”  


“Anyway, Ashe,” Claude walks over to him, alarming Ashe about his personal space being invaded and it most certainly doesn't ease him with how Claude throws an arm over his shoulders gesturing to the others.

“Lemme introduce you to everyone, I’ll try to keep it short.” Claude gestures to the rather tall purple haired man who seems none too eager about the introduction. “That’s Lorenz, I wouldn’t ask about his noble obligations or his love life.”    
  
Lorenz scuffs. “Nothing is wrong with my love life, thank you! The ladies are simply fighting amongst themselves to be with someone of such-”    
  
Claude interrupts, continuing without missing a beat. “The shorter guy with the glasses next to him? That’s Ignatz. He’s training to become a knight.” Now that certainly caught Ashe’s attention. A fellow knight-in-training! Perhaps he’d get along well with him.    
  
..Though Ignatz didn’t seem too pleased by the mention of becoming a knight, judging by the almost sullen look.   
  
“A pleasure to make your acquaintance.” Ignatz bows. Ah, he was pretty mannerized at least.    
  
“The even shorter one there is Lysithea. She’s the youngest out of all of us, but don’t treat her like a child or she’ll get  _ really  _ angry.”    
  
“Yet you, and most of the others, insist on doing so anyway.” Lysithea rolls her eyes which once again does nothing to phase Claude. More-so it wasn’t directed at him, but it didn’t look like much would bother the house leader.    
  
“The big strong guy is Raphael, he likes eating and training. Probably the most cheerful guy you’ll ever meet. I believe that’s about it! Unless you wanna add anything in, Raph?” That has Ashe laughing softly. Right to the point with this one, huh?   


“Nope! You got me down perfectly! If you ever need any help just ask! But not with studying, heavy lifting is what I’m best at.” Maybe he could train sometime with Raphael, it’d be good for him and the big guy was eager about helping out. A blue haired girl next to Raphael shifted uncomfortably catching both the archer’s eyes. She seemed rather shy. Or tired? Maybe both.   
  
“Marianne there doesn’t speak that much, Hilda is, as you already know, lazy, which isn’t too unusual for a noble. Leonie wants to be a mercenary. She’s pretty blunt and stingy as they come.”   
  
Marianne merely looks away as for Hilda and Leonie, they only shrug at the descriptions. Seems like they didn’t find much a problem with it. That’s.. Good, he guesses?    
  
“And then there's me! Your courageous leader! I'm pretty handy with a bow too if you ever wanna train together. I wanna get to know you, freckles.” And with a wink Claude releases Ashe from his hold. Not that it was an unwelcome gesture, it was just different to get such attention from a house leader.    


“Don't you mean our foolish scheming leader?” Lorenz retorts with annoyance. It appeared not everyone appreciated their house leader like so many did in the Blue Lions.

What a strange, yet intriguing bunch..

However one question did come to mind. How did Claude already know he's an archer?


	2. Unusual Pleasantries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashe slowly gets to know a few of his classmates.

Ashe’s first day was rather slow, nothing new learned other than about his classmates. Perhaps their professor was cutting him some slack considering the new circumstances, something he found himself thankful for despite not accomplishing much in the day.

It only got awkward around dinner time. It truly was a struggle standing amongst rows of tables unsure on where to enjoy his meal. His former classmates were mostly together and no one from the Golden Deer seemed to be around.   


He should be happy for them, yet it pained him to see how much fun they were having, as if his absence wasn't missed. He's pretty sure he had caught the eye of Ingrid, but it was best he turn away now before he got too sentimental.

_ ‘I suppose eating alone is better than not getting to eat at all.’   
_

Years of struggling to get by as a thief for the sake of him and his two younger siblings had taught him to appreciate every meal they came by.   


Fortunately the Goddess had showed him some mercy since the dining staff was serving pheasant roast with berry sauce, one of his favorite meals. How could anyone be fully upset with a meal like that?

“Hey Ashe! You got a mighty appetite, I like that!” Raphael’s booming voice nearly startles him, but he at least manages a smile without choking. A mighty appetite? Perhaps he was eating pretty quickly, but then again it had been a long day and he was ready to leave the dining hall as quick as possible.

Though the various plates Raphael brings along with him piqued his interest.

“It's more about taste than it is appetite but it has been an exhausting day. Do you enjoy this type of dish too?” Perhaps he could find common ground with at least one of his classmates today. That'd be a good enough accomplishment for one day. Or maybe the week.

“It tastes great, but I prefer more meat than this. Do you want some more? I can share! You're so skinny too, you need to eat more!” And before Ashe knows it another full plate is slid right against his current one with Raphael positively beaming.   


How was he supposed to say no?   


“There's two of my favorite guys! Already eating without me?” Ashe’s not sure why, but the sight of Claude joining them for dinner put him at ease. It meant he, as well as Raphael, were already comfortable enough to eat with him. Though it was hard to tell if he was truly upset about getting to dinner late. “Anyway, tonight the dining hall is serving up one of my favs, what luck!”   


This newfound information both shocks and delights Ashe. Another new thing he had in common with a  _ different  _ housemate! What luck indeed!   


“This is actually one of my favorites too.” Ashe speaks up after the sounds of their forks clinking against their plates starts to settle down. He was already pretty full and he wasn't sure how he'd manage to eat the meal Raphael insisted he have.

“We have great tastes then! Literally so.” Claude laughs quietly at his own joke, eyes glancing down and back over to Ashe with a certain gleam in his eyes. “Are you going to eat that?”   


“Oh! You can have it if you want-”   


“How about we share it?” Well, that was a kind idea. That way they could both enjoy their favorite meal without being overly full he could agree to-   


“Say, ‘ahh!’”   


-to  _ that?  _ Surely Claude was just.. No, it wasn't a jest. Claude looks at him expectantly with his fork held out to the other with what Ashe would think is a sly smile.   


“U-um wouldn't it be easier if we just split it in half?” To be fed by a noble, Gods what would his adoptive father think?

“What fun is there in that? C’mon,”

With the fork still held out to him Ashe has to hold back a sigh and finally takes the bite with his face feeling warmer than it should be. It doesn't help him any at the laugh he receives.   


“See? That wasn't so hard. Oh, what's this?” This time it's Ashe holding out a piece of meat to Claude finding it rather hard to meet his eyes. Quick glances was all he could muster and he thanks the Goddess for Raphael being too preoccupied with his meal to notice whatever.. This was.

A friendly exchange of food between friends or allies? Maybe things were different in the Golden Deer.

As quick as Ashe was with taking the bite Claude takes a painfully slow amount of time as if he were savoring every second of the flavor. It almost felt like a deliberate act-

“Claude you hypocrite, I thought you said it’s, ‘a whole new level of laziness to get fed by someone’.” The pink haired girl- Hilda, was it? Plopped down next to Claude with a pout on her face. It's then Claude chooses to pull back with an easy-going grin.   


“No, I said it was a whole new level of laziness for  _ you _ , Hilda. I was simply spending time with our new classmate here. Right, Ashe?”   


Oh, he didn't like all the attention directed towards him now. Not one bit. Especially with more of his housemates coming, now was the best time to retreat while he still could.   


“Y-yep, just as our leader says. If you'll excuse me..”   


The best thing about being a former thief was he was at least great at escaping when the opening presented itself.   


“Hey, wait-”

..Though it was unfortunate that he banged his knee on the table on his way out. To retreat in front of a noble was shameful in its own way, but he could apologize to Claude later. If not today he'd just see him in their class tomorrow anyway.

And for the rest of his time at the monastery.

*******

Ashe liked to believe the library was his sanctuary. Somewhere he could hide out and relax with any of his favorite books. It almost felt like a home away from home.   


And there were so many stories on chivalrous knights! He got so engrossed with them by the time he was finished it'd already be evening.

He was nearly on his last sentence before a girl’s scream and a loud thump was heard.   


_ ‘Gods, what was that?!’   
_

With his heart pounding Ashe jumps up from his chair exploring the library for the source of the sound. If anyone were being attacked.. He hoped that wasn't the case. Maybe he should invest in a small dagger..

“Lysithea?” Or maybe he wouldn't need to just yet. The girl jumped at his sudden appearance and dusted herself off before she held her arms close to her.

“A-Ashe? How rude of you to play a dirty trick like that! I dropped all of my books too-”

“What are you talking about? I heard you scream so I ran over.” With a pile of books scattered across the floor he would have thought she couldn't continue to carry them. Who would scare the poor thing?

“S-so you mean.. No, surely it was someone else is all..” Lysithea mumbled to herself, looking uneasy. Ashe was starting to share the feeling with the library seeming more.. Eerie during the nighttime.   


“W-well whatever it was allow me to help you.” Ashe offers a smile, one Lysithea doesn't return but gets down to help pick up the books anyway. The fact that he wasn't alone in the library made Ashe feel much better than he had been, even if it was quiet-

“Hey guys!”   


“Ah!” Ashe and Lysithea yelp in union, the progress of their book collecting back down to a mess on the floor. Lysithea clings to Ashe’s arm and it takes them a minute to realize there was no terror. Just Claude.

_ ‘There goes a few years off my life, now I know how Lysithea feels.’ _

“Claude!” The shorter of the trio is quick to shove Ashe away who winces at the strength from such a small girl. He made a mental note not to get on her bad side. “Look what you made us do! We were nearly done cleaning up!”

“My bad, but now it seems you brought me into this vicious cycle of charity. Allow me to help you out. Sooner we get done, the sooner you won't be late getting to bed.” Claude smiles at the glare he receives, kneeling down to pick up a few books with ease. Ashe stumbles a bit, unsure of what to say but fortunately for them Claude was more of the talker.

“Surprised to see you here this late, Ashe. I already ‘lectured' Lysithea, but what's caught your attention?”   


Ashe sets down his stack of books, smiling to himself. “I was just reading a new book that had come in. I love tales about heroic knights, I know it's pretty childish, but..”   


Claude copies Ashe, but holds up a hand. “Say no more. It's okay to have your own interests, after all poetry is one of my favorites. Nothing quite relaxing like hearing or reciting one every now and then.”   


“And then we have Lysithea here, whose always stuck in her studies. It's okay to read a fairytale or one of those romance novels Seteth bans every now and then.”  _ How  _ Claude would even know about that is beyond him, but he agrees it's okay to let loose when it's needed.   


“Yeah, right. You can get lost in your little fantasies, but I'll stick to my studies thank you.” Lysithea rolls her eyes and opens one of her books despite the late hour.   


“Isn't it pretty late to-” Lysithea shoots him a look that makes Ashe quickly close his mouth. Yikes, he didn't intend on stepping in red territory now.

“I agree, it  _ is  _ late. I don't know about you guys but I'm gonna head back before the ghost appears here.”   


_ “Ghosts!?”  _ Ashe exclaims and quickly looks around. Goddess,  _ please  _ let him be joking. He never heard about a ghost living at the monastery!   


“M-maybe I'll head back now too.” Lysithea immediately closes her book, remaining close to Ashe. As long as she didn't shove him away again he doesn't mind her being close. Even Claude right by his side brought a great deal of comfort to him.

Claude eyes Ashe curiously but says nothing until they're nearly out of the library. “Don't worry you two, your leader here will protect you.”   


Lysithea scoffs. “You don't even have your bow on you, Claude.”

Claude grins. “I wasn't aware you could defeat ghosts with arrows.”   


“Did you plan on wrestling the ghost?” Ashe bites back a laugh at the mental image of such a wild scenario.

“I was planning on a fist-fight. I've seen my mom do enough of them to know how it's done.” That was rather interesting to hear..   


“A noble picking a fist-fight?”

“Why are you more baffled about my mom than me?”   


“Because it's coming from  _ you _ , Claude.” Lysithea deadpans and sighs. “Thank you for accompanying me, good night.” A cheerful farewell is bid by the duo but it doesn't take long for things to get quiet. Perhaps now was a good time to apologize..

“Um, Claude? I'm sorry for running out on you earlier. I was just.. Embarrassed is all. It was rude of me to do and I-”

“You were worried about that? I'm flattered you thought so much of my feelings.” It's said in such a way that was a mix between being sincere and finding humor in it. It really was hard to read Claude. “I wish you would have stayed around longer, you know to spend more time with the others. How about you make it up to me tomorrow?”   


Once again Ashe finds himself in a deal too good to pass up. And it'd make Claude pleased as well!   


“O-of course! I won't let you down!” Ashe lets out a breath of relief and quickly bows with a smile. All that fretting over nothing! Claude was a pretty laid back guy.   


“That's the spirit. Since we're both being sickeningly honest here I gotta admit it was pretty cute seeing you all flustered. Anyway, night! Sweet dreams, freckles!”

With a confession like that Ashe can only stand outside his door room feeling mystified.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just some more interactions before I get on to some of the plot stuff. Hope you're enjoying the story so far, and thank you for reading!


	3. Mock Battle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally the end of the first month.

Nearly a month in Ashe was proud to say he was getting the hang of his new class. Byleth certainly was an excellent teacher for being a mercenary, but he figured everyone has their own talents. Even if they weren't first aware of them.

Nothing new was taught to him either except sword practice every now and then. The professor had him focus more on his bow training with Claude; something he found himself surprised to enjoy even if it was meant to increase his archery level.

More importantly he was learning more about his classmates. It astounded Ashe how different they all were, but despite that they still managed to piece together. If anything he almost felt like the odd one out, but with Claude saying he ‘fit right in’ well that..

That was refreshing to hear. Even if the Golden Deer were filled with what Claude had labeled them as, ‘a bunch of misfits.’   
  
For a house leader and a noble Claude was surprisingly easy to talk to. It's something that had thrown Ashe through a loop despite knowing him for almost a month.    


With his old house maybe he was the odd one out; everyone had their own close friend or best friend and he liked to believe Ingrid was his. But hearing she was childhood friends with Dimitri, Sylvain, and Felix it sort of felt like he was out of the loop on that one anyway.

However, just because he was in a new house didn't mean he didn't have to stop being friends with his old ones. If time permitted it perhaps he could chat with Ingrid again.   


His mission for now was befriending his new ones, along with getting ready for the mock battle of the Eagle and Lion. It'd give him the new experience of battling with the Golden Deer and figuring out where he was needed. Being able to protect his classmates from afar was perhaps one of the best feelings in the world for Ashe. After all he was striving to be a knight!

“Hey, Ashe!” Speaking of his house leader..

“Oh, hello Claude!” Maybe it was Claude’s infectious behavior or maybe it was his current thoughts of being a knight, but Ashe found his motivation incredibly increased.

“I just got a short lecture from, teach. I had a perfect scheme thought up to ensure our victory, but it was completely shot down! You'd think he'd be on board with the idea of, you know,  _ winning. _ ” Claude speaks as if he were both exasperated and offended, but as he walks along the stone walks of the monastery his laid back posture would show he wasn't worried about the upcoming battle. Slowly Ashe was starting to read him. Emphasis on  _ slowly _ .

“I believe we can win without any.. Questionable schemes.” And he truly believed so too. Everyone else had their own special skills and brought together they could secure the victory.

“You mean fair and square? Pretty boring, but I  _ guess  _ if we have to. At least teach gave us the day off!” Well, he liked his spirit.

“That is a bonus, and what are you up to on this rare occasion?” Ashe smiles to Claude, letting his eyes wander to the passing butterfly. A day off and a nice one at that. It was pretty serene at the monastery.   


.. Except for the ghosts. He still can't tell if Claude was joking or not.   
  
“Thought I’d see how my favorite archer is doing, nothing wrong with that, right?”    
  
That quickly catches Ashe’s attention. As if he were about to give himself wipe flash Ashe’s eyes widen with surprise, but he finds himself having trouble maintaining eye contact as he tries to suppress the rising blush on his face.    
  
“I-Isn’t Ignatz an archer too? I don’t think-”    
  
As always Claude’s quick to intervene. “That’s because he’s my favorite artist.”    
  
Oh. That was something new. Perhaps that’s why he always saw Ignatz sneak off after bow practice. Why would he hide such a wonderful hobby?    
  
“Really? Is he embarrassed about it..? I’ve never seen him do it openly.” Was he too focused on his goal of becoming a knight to share his interest in painting? There was nothing to be embarrassed about, even Ashe had his own personal hobbies he wasn’t afraid to admit. Cooking and gardening were rather relaxing to him, one of which he was on his way to doing as of now.    
  
“I’m not so sure myself either. He just likes to draw and I’ll leave it at that. For now.” Claude winks, a sly smile on his face as if he were already scheming how he’d figure out the puzzle that is Ignatz. Another thing Ashe had learned about the noble was that he was highly curious and wouldn’t stop digging until he found what he needed to know.    


“I wonder what favorites you listed the others as.” Ashe says absentmindedly. While he was mildly curious it would give insight to how the others were, or their hobbies like he had just learned about Ignatz.    
  
Claude’s eyes get that certain gleam to them again, something Ashe learned is either dangerous or amusing for the noble. “Don’t fret over it, you’re still my favorite in other areas too.  _ But  _ I already told you one for today.”    
  
Ashe isn’t sure how to reply and doesn’t when the greenhouse finally comes into view. His steps increased with an eagerness to see how his plants were coming along. If he was correct then it was about time to harvest them too!    
  
.. But getting excited about checking up on plants was lame, wasn’t it? The realization that Claude had practically seen him nearly  _ skipping  _ to the greenhouse was mortifying enough to halt him in his steps. So much for his repaired pride.    
  
“A-ah sorry, I’m just overly eager to see how my tea leaves are growing..”    
  
When Ashe turns to Claude he expects to see the look of judgement or even Claude laughing at how much going to see  _ plants  _ was making him so giddy.   
  
But that’s not what he gets.   
  
What he  _ sees  _ is Claude giving him a look of.. Fondness? No, that can’t be right. Maybe he was mistaken, maybe he wasn’t, but Ashe could never make such a bold assumption. Especially with his last one being that maybe even Claude was a fan of plants as well.    
  
That nearly made him laugh.    
  
“I didn’t know you were much for gardening, you’re always practicing or in the library.” Claude says, his voice full of surprise.    
  
“Lord Lonato taught me as much. Growing up with him we always needed fresh fruit and vegetables for his restaurant.” Ashe kneels in front of his tea leaves, Claude crouching down to his level; eyes always ever so curious. There wasn’t anything fascinating about gardening, but the fact that Claude went out of his way to spend time with him, to actually be invested in what he was doing made Ashe’s heart swell. “When I wasn’t out in the garden I was helping him cook.”    
  
Claude whistles. “You can cook too? You’re a catch, huh?”    
  
A small laugh escapes Ashe as he plucks the tea leaves off with ease. “Maybe so. Raphael was telling me about his favorite drinks on our way back to our dorms. For helping me carry my books I thought I’d repay his kindness.” The ginger tea leaves are placed securely in a small pouch that Ashe now holds carefully. Even if it was a small gesture Ashe still appreciated it, plus it’s something he’d want to do. For a friend.    
  
“Do you have a favorite tea flavor Claude? I wouldn’t mind growing you some leaves too.”    
  
“You’re stuck on favorites today, huh?” Claude bites back a grin to Ashe’s embarrassment. “I guess I’d be willing to tell you if you told me yours of course.”    
  
“And I thought I was the one who was good at bargaining.” Ashe laughs, standing with Claude. “Very well, mine are mint and angelica tea leaves. Now, what are yours?”    
  
“Chamomile is one of my favs. We both have unique tastes.” He wasn’t going to name the other? Was it something Ashe had to find out on his own or accidentally?    
  
“Just one?”   
  
“I know, I’m a total tease today.” Despite being disappointed Ashe still manages to laugh. “Don’t strain that mind too hard, we’ve got a big day tomorrow. Even if it’s not the real deal.” Claude’s arm drapes casually over Ashe, leading them both out of the greenhouse and into the pleasant late spring air.   
  
“You too Claude, and good luck.”    
  
“Who needs luck?”    
  
***** ** ****   
****   
The day of the mock battle was certainly interesting. Everyone in class was motivated to do their best, minus Marianne for reasons unknown to Ashe. To him it seemed like a low self esteem thing but he’d honestly like to help her work on that after their battle. Marianne didn’t need to carry her burdens all by herself, she had allies and friends to rely on.    
  
Even Hilda seemed into it, who exclaimed loudly she’d leave the fighting for the rest of the team, but she still got near the front lines despite that. Maybe Byleth placed her there, but either way she wasn’t complaining which was definitely a good sign.    
  
Lorenz was busy exclaiming how it was his job as a noble to protect them- Ashe wasn’t really sure all of what he said when he was positioned more to the left side of the field. From the distance it was easy to see Claude going back and forth with him, earning a quiet laugh from Ashe who hid in the bushes.    
  
“Honestly those two.” Leonie shook her head, her sword swaying. “How could anyone think Lysithea was the child of the group?” Said girl cast a wave of magic that made their banter quiet down. Ashe almost felt bad for whoever was on the receiving end of that.    
  
“I think it makes things lively, plus it’s always good when Claude’s dissing someone that isn’t me.” Hilda pipes up almost chipperly. That’s understandable, considering how easy it was for Claude to make comebacks. What else to expect from their cunning leader?    
  
To anyone else it’d look like two allies chatting on the battlefield, but knowing Byleth or Claude the two girls were placed together to hide the fact that Ashe was hiding, ready to strike any Black Eagles’ member who came into sight. The fact that he was made to target them instead of the Blue Lions was relieving. Again, he wasn’t sure whose idea it was, but if Ashe were pointing his bow at Dimitri, Ingrid or any of his former allies he’s sure he’d hesitate.    
  
Would it even count as betrayal if he did that? Again, this was only the mock battle but he can’t help but wonder..    
  
“Get ready, I see Edelgard coming into view. Looks like Claude’s silver tongue didn’t help him this time, look how composed she is!” Hilda grips her axe tightly, rushing in to clash her axe with Edelgard’s. It was odd to see her rush to do well, anything, but everything was different on the battlefield. They were all looking out for one another, one reason as to why Leonie kept a safe distance with Ashe to protect him.    
  
Ashe ready his bow, breathing in slowly as he watched his target. It was hard to get a good aim on Edelgard when so many were going after her, especially when it was just their small group of: Claude, Hilda, Leonie and himself. Byleth was busy leading the rest of their allies to finish off the remaining Blue Lions class.   
  
With his bow prepared he knew the minute he fired would be the minute it gave away his position. Even if it wasn’t a real battle it still left his heart pounding a little too harshly against his chest. The moment his fingers released from the bow string was when it felt like time had slowed down. The arrow was meant to hit Edelgard, but it did land dangerously close to her feet. Their eyes met and a chill ran up his spine from meeting the imperial princess’s eyes. Things got even more terrifying when Hubert directed his immediate attention to Ashe. Leonie was already sprinting ahead to back him up, highly aware of the situation. His fingers trembled as he readied another arrow, knowing full well he wouldn’t be ready for the dark magic user.    
  
“Watch it!”    
  
Goddess, it was the first time Ashe was absolutely  _ relieved  _ to see Raphael barrel into someone. Especially if that someone was Hubert. Ashe doesn’t care where he came from, but all he knew was that he’d grow a whole greenhouse of tea leaves for Raphael.    
  
“Alright everyone! We secured the win!”    
  
They won..? Hubert was down on the ground and Edelgard was surrounded by his whole team, obviously outnumbered with a broken axe- yep they had indeed won. Ashe may or may not have lost another year off his life, but they did it!    
  
“We.. We actually did it!” Ignatz exclaimed, in fact it was the loudest Ashe had ever heard him speak. It was a nice change for once.    
  
“Great job everyone!” Ashe jogged over, positively beaming. How could he not? They won the first battle, surely the next one would be just as easy! It was a long ways off, but that just meant they’d grow as a team in the meantime.    
  
“We got them good!” Raphael grinned, spinning Lysithea around. Words of protest were heard, yet when she was set down the magic user didn't utter a single complaint. She was probably too dizzy to-  
  
“W-wait!” Apparently Raphael was doing it to everyone, that or just teammates within his reach. Ashe felt his vision going sideways after getting spun around once, but he quickly shook his head to set his sight back in order. He was in the same boat as Lysithea; he was too proud to ruin the joyous moment. Even Marianne was sporting a small smile of her own.   
  
“I can’t believe Claude’s plan worked,” Lorenz ran a hand through his hair, gaze wondering. “I must admit this one was more than decent at best, but even Edelgard was caught off by it.”    
  
“Oh come on, you can admit he’s a pretty great leader. Not better than Jeralt, but you can at least give him praise today.” Leonie elbowed Lorenz and Ashe followed their gazes. It seemed the house leaders were conversing, maybe it was okay to listen in like the others were..   
  
“I must admit you did quite well.” It was rare to see Edelgard calmly admit defeat, but then again he never really saw her on the losing side..   
  
“And by honorable methods too, you surprised us all Claude.” Dimitri singing his praises too had Ashe’s smile softening. There was no bad blood between the two even with Ashe now being in the Golden Deer.   
  
“Lesson learned for you two. Never underestimate an outsider.”   
  
Outsider?    
  
“Hey teach! Did we do great or what?” Goddess, Claude’s demeanor didn’t change at all. What did he mean by an outsider? “I’d say it was good enough for a feast!” That earned a good bit of cheers from their friends, even Ashe was back to smiling after his brief confusion. The time to celebrate was now anyway.   
  
“You all did well, I’d say that gives us a reason to celebrate.”    
  
“Alright everyone, you heard it! We’re going to have a feast in the dining hall-- which sounds a lot like our usual dinner, but I did swipe us some cheese for this occasion!”    
  
“You planned this ahead?” Hilda asked, apparently surprised. Ashe had to admit he was pretty surprised too, but knowing Claude had faith in them was enough for him.   
  
“Why Hilda, I’m offended!”   
  
And thus returned the usual routine of Claude and Hilda going back and forth on each other until one of them grew tired or to the point where the other couldn’t think of a witty comeback.    
  
Ashe could have watched, along with his other classmates, the exchange for as long as they could, but the professor was already leading them back to the monastery. Seems he was eager about the feast as well and it was nice to see him express rare emotions of joy when he could. Their professor was highly mysterious too, no wonder Claude was always trying to read him.   
  
Claude, a mystery himself trying to figure out the biggest mystery of them all.   
  
_ “Never underestimate an outsider.”  _   
  
It’s a phrase that once again echoes through Ashe’s head who can’t keep his eyes off Claude throughout their path back to the monastery. Maybe he’s mistaken, but growing up he always thought commoners like himself were the ones looking in. If he were a noble, then why would he be an outsider?    
  
Claude’s curiosity certainly was infectious too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for updating so slow, but here we go now! Hope you enjoyed this chapter and once again thank you for reading!


	4. Stable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another slow week for Ashe, but let the good times roll while they can. 
> 
> Minor-ish spoilers for a few references from a couple of supports.

Another new month meant new beginnings, at least that's how Ashe felt. Though he can't say bow practice was any different, but he was learning in more ways than one.   


Everyone was certainly chipper after winning the mock battle, but once the sweet feeling of victory ran out it was back to the usual. Sitting in class scribbling down notes wasn't exactly thrilling, but peaceful days like such were ones that so many strived for.   


Ashe’s been through enough already to know that he'd prefer to have slow days over hectic ones.

His brother and sister were faring well, much to his relief, but he still hasn't heard from Lord Lonato. It was worrisome, even making him want to leave to check home, but he couldn't. His adoptive father paid too much for him to come here and if he didn't keep up his studies what would he think? If his brother and sister were okay then surely Lonato was too.

But it couldn't hurt to check if he could take the time off.. Maybe he was too busy to write back or was away-

_ “Ow!”   
_

Ashe fell on the ground, causing the few books he was carrying to scatter around him. Was he so wrapped up in his thoughts again he forget to be aware of his surroundings?   


_ ‘And that's what worry does to one..’ _

“I'm so sorry!” The apology was automatic, but running into  _ Lorenz  _ would probably only worsen how he appeared to the noble. Not like he talked much to him in the first place, but running into someone wasn't exactly the best way to start up a topic.

“As much as that hurt..” Lorenz sighs, dusting himself off as he stands. “I wasn't looking where I was going either. I was too preoccupied by my own thoughts. My apologizes, Ashe.” Oh that was certainly well mannered of Lorenz. Nor was he angry, things were getting on a better footing already. Sort of.

“It's okay, but,” Ashe pauses as he collects his books, gratefully taking the hand offered out to him. “Is there something troubling you?” If anything it was just a guess. Ashe had a good bit on his mind so he figured perhaps Lorenz was preoccupied as well.

“If you must know there's been.. Complaints going around about me. Our own professor telling me not to ‘flirt’ when I am simply offering a life of luxury and nobility to any lady that is deemed suitable!” Ashe would have thought he was jesting had it not been the fact that he sounded so offended.

“It uh, certainly sounds scandalous.”   


“It is! I'm glad at least one of my fellow classmates can sympathize for me.” Lorenz sighs, adjusting his rose. “I do apologize for bringing any harm to you. It is the duty of a noble to protect commoners, not hurt them.”

“Isn't that the duty of a knight?” Or well, anyone with good intent.   


“Hm, that too.” Lorenz eyes him in a way that Ashe finds uneasy; eyes of a noble who could be looking down on him or-

“You often hang out with Claude, why is that?”   


-Or he could just be curious.

“Claude’s my friend, is there anything unusual about that?” As far as Ashe knew there wasn't anything wrong with simply spending time with a classmate and a friend. Part of him was still giddy that he managed to make friends with the archer. Even if Claude was almost always the one to approach him.   


“I suppose not, but he did take a quick liking to you. I wouldn't know how you put up with him. I can't even have a nice cup of tea with him without it having an unpleasant ending.” Lorenz scoffs, looking as if he had just bitten into something sour. Not everyone can hit it off the first time or another, but Ashe has no idea how long the two had been friends, or if Lorenz considered them to have that sort of relationship.   


Knowing Claude he most certainly would believe that they are friends.

“I honestly wouldn't know what he sees in me,” Ashe shrugs. “He's complimented my archery skill, but Claude’s just friendly.” From Ashe’s point of view he did see him that way. Claude could be a tease, but it was always harmless or just him trying to make his own fun.   


With Lorenz and Claude he could see how their personalities would clash. But they could also coexist.

“You must have a kind hearted soul to not speak ill of him,” Lorenz sighs, unnecessarily dramatic for a minor situation. “There are so many secrets he refuses to let anyone in on. His background is mostly a mystery as well. Yet he's always sticking his nose in the affairs of others. Doesn't that make you wonder?”   


“I'd be lying if I said I wasn't the least bit curious about Claude,” A soft smile finds its way onto Ashe’s face. If he didn't know any better he'd think he smiled anytime the topic of Claude was brought up.   


“But him being a mystery is half the fun.”

*******

“I can't believe teach put us on stable duty.” It's odd hearing Claude complain, or be the one complaining. When it came to work usually Hilda was the one to express what most of the class was thinking.   


“It's not so bad,” As soon as it's said Ashe dodges a tail swat from the current horse they're tending to. “Then again weed pulling feels much easier than this.”   


“Wouldn't have to worry about grass attacking us for not tending to it.” Claude laughs at the look the horse gives him. It's hard to read an animal’s expression, but he's pretty sure by now it was fed up with them. “Least I got you as a partner. Teach’s way of showing me mercy.”   


Ashe ducks his head at the wink he gets.

“Sorry to disappoint you, but I'm not very good at this.” Ashe flashes an apologetical smile before brushing the horse’s tail who neighs at the attention. He's not really sure if it's a good or bad thing, but at least he's not getting smacked at.

Again.

“Not much for animals?” Claude pipes up as he scrubs the horse. The small talk was a nice distraction until the task was done.

“No, just when it comes to tending horses. I do adore cats.” And if anyone asked no, he absolutely wasn't sneaking leftovers to a thief cat he found a while back.   


Okay maybe he  _ would  _ admit to that. Nothing wrong with treating the little ones.

“You know, I'm not really good with them either. When I was a kid my father used to tie me to a horse and drag me around.”   


“I see-” Ashe’s head jerks up. “Wait, what!?” Ashe’s eyes are most likely the size of saucers and he can't even fathom how on earth Claude was acting so  _ casual  _ about an awful childhood experience.   


“To be fair I was a brat and the horse thing was way worse than it sounds. There's a trick to getting loose..”   


“Claude, that's terrible! You- Gods, are you  _ okay?”  _ Ashe inspects him as if he were recently bruised and damaged something Claude  _ laughs  _ at.   


“You sound just like Hilda when I told her. ‘Course I’m okay.” Claude brushes off his hands, patting the horse as they finish locking up. “But really, I had it coming.”   


How he's able to grin about it still baffles Ashe.   


“Your parents are nobles, aren't they? I wouldn't think they'd- that they'd just  _ drag  _ you around like that!”   


“Oh my father is quite the extravagant one. And my mother is a toss between a warrior Goddess and a demon queen.” Claude grins ear to ear once again leaving Ashe at a loss. His opinion on nobles felt as if it was starting to shake, or perhaps it was Claude who was opening his eyes to how some royals were.   


He expected most to be proper and well behaved, kind of like how Lorenz is. What a change Claude's family was to all the ones he read about or had seen. A new input on how nobles could do things even commoners would do.

Er, except the ‘tying your kid to a horse’ part.

“They sound um, fascinating?” And pretty scary. He's pretty sure Claude already knows about his fear of ghosts, he doesn't need to know another. And a recent one at that.

“They're something alright. What's your old man like?” Claude stretches and leans against the stable. It hits Ashe that they can leave now and report back to their professor, but he can't quite break the rhythm in their conversation.

Nor does he want to.

“Lord Lonato is a very kind man! He taught me how to read, how to cook and so many wonders in life I hadn't known until I met him.” So many fond memories he held dearly. Had it not been for that fateful night- for Lonato’s generosity and kind heart he and his siblings wouldn't be where they are today.   


It eases him how Claude was always so willing to listen to him, as if every drop of information he came by was fascinating.   


“You really look up to him, huh?”   


Ashe gives an eager nod, opening his mouth to speak but the horse, Goddess the horse that most  _ definitely  _ had it out for him, bumped its head against him; a small act that Ashe leapt from.

At this rate he was going to get a bad reputation for being clumsy.   


Ashe gives the horse a look of distress. A laugh  _ too  _ close to his ears makes the archer suddenly aware of his surroundings. Claude’s hands rested comfortably on his waist, as if this was  _ normal  _ for him. For them.

Ashe has to squirm awkwardly out of the hold and pats the horse’s snout, unable to look Claude in the eyes. He's sure if he did, if he had the courage he'd only feel even more embarrassed.   


“N-nice work today.”   


It was lame, it was an excuse to talk about something instead of awkward silence-

“I'd say I'm satisfied.”

Why was he starting to get flustered over such trivial things now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for this being pretty cheesy, trying to add in some fluff and a little more interactions between canon/game chapters. If y'all have seen/played Chapter 3 then you know what's coming 
> 
> Thank you for reading and for all the kudos & comments! <3


	5. Flowers & Paintings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soft boy finally interacting with the other two softies of the group.

Outdoor walks were always a great way to burn time, especially in the early stages of summer; not quite hot, but cool enough to enjoy the weather. Despite his worries for Lonato Ashe finds the scenery relaxing his nerves.

At least his siblings were still keeping in touch with him, not going into detail about their adoptive father, but if they weren't concerned perhaps there was nothing to be worried about in the first place.  
  
He hopes.   
  
On his way back from the greenhouse Ashe notices familiar blue hair near the horse stables. Not anywhere he'd want to go anytime soon but with his hands full of flowers he wouldn't mind sharing a gift.

_ ‘Perhaps it'll even lift her mood.’ _

The thought has Ashe smiling to himself. He hadn't ever met anyone that disliked flowers, surely Marianne would appreciate the gift of nature.

“It is a beautiful day, isn't it?”  


Ashe halts in his steps with minor confusion. There wasn't anyone around other than himself, who could she be talking to?

“Would you like some treats later?” Despite no one being in her presence Marianne’s tone is unusually cheerful for once. It's actually the most Ashe has heard her talk.

“Marianne?”  


Marianne lets out a squeak of surprise and Ashe realizes who she had been talking to. If the bird was any indication then he would have sworn she was chatting with one of the horses.

Guilt rushes through him. “O-oh I'm sorry I didn't mean to startle you.”  


“I-it's okay.. Did you need something?” Tired eyes glance at him, but are unable to meet his own curious ones. He's beginning to wonder if he should have approached her some other time.  


“Nothing in particular. I was just at the greenhouse and I thought you'd like a flower.” Ashe smiles warmly, trying not to bring Marianne anymore discomfort. He knew it was a big step for her to interact with others more than she wanted to.  


“Oh I couldn't-”

“No really, I insist! You can have any of them you want.” Hopefully he wasn't too pushy and with the arrangement of flowers already held out to her there wasn't much of a choice. Ashe wasn't really the  _ best  _ with tactics, but hopefully Marianne wouldn't start feeling uncomfortable.

“Oh um.. May I have this one?” Marianne reaches for a lily of the valley, but pulls her hand back as if she had just gotten burned. “If not-”  


“Of course!” Ashe cuts her off, something he wouldn't do any other time, but he wasn't about to let Marianne start bringing herself down.  


A hint of a smile appears on Marianne’s face as delicate fingers wrap around the small flower. To see his classmate, possible friend,  _ smiling  _ made him feel warm. Even if it was a small gesture he was relieved to see Marianne happy for once, even if it was just the slightest bit of joy.

“Thank you.. They're my favorite.”  


“They are very lovely,” Ashe pipes up happily. “Violets are my favorite flower. The greenhouse is very relaxing, isn't it?” Not that he'd out right say it, but he had seen Marianne in the greenhouse admiring the flowers every now and then. He's glad someone appreciated them too.

“Yes, it is..”  


They exchange smiles and although the conversation had a lull in it Ashe didn't mind the quietness. Though he's pretty sure the horse still wasn't very fond of him.

“U-um, excuse me. I must leave.” Ashe tries not to frown at how quickly Marianne is to fleeing. So the silence wasn't ideal for her, he could remember that for next time. Even think up some new topics in the meantime!  


“Ashe! Didn't think I'd see you here.” Voice filled with humor Claude's eyes glance to the horse and back to Ashe. Was it a good or bad thing he stopped being surprised by Claude’s daily appearances? Either way by now Ashe was getting used to them.

“I could say the same thing to you.” Ashe smiles, adjusting the flowers in his arms. “I thought you were thinking up uh, colorful ideas.” Because he certainly wasn't going to call them schemes. Claude was more honorable than that.  


Well not as much as Dimitri, but he was still honorable in his own way.

“Colorful ideas? That's cute.” Claude laughs. “I got it all covered. Was on my way to find Hilda, but I was intrigued to see Marianne talking with you. Hardly anyone has heard her speak more than a sentence or two.” Once again Claude’s curiosity was leading him by the hand. Ashe can't blame him considering he'd be curious too if he were in Claude's shoes.

“I gave Marianne a flower to cheer her up. It is nice to see her smile.. Oh! Would you like one as well, Claude?” Ashe beams as he holds out the bundle of flowers. Claude almost looks taken aback for a second.

“Showering me in flowers, I'm flattered.” A grin finds its way on Claude’s face as he grabs a violet. “But I think they suit you more than me.”  


A hand reaches out past Ashe, who blinks in confusion until he notices Claude tucking the flower behind his ear. Another rush of warmth runs through him, but this one differs from when he gave Marianne a flower. One he can’t quite place his finger on.

“See? It fits you perfectly.”

“O-oh um-”  


“Claude!” Hilda attempts to wave at their house leader with her hands full of what looked like rolled up maps.

“Too lazy to walk on over? Sheesh!” Claude rolls his eyes playfully, pausing before he turned. “Talk to you later, freckles!”

Ashe isn't sure what to say, only standing there dumbfounded nearly dropping the flowers in his hands as he watches Claude catch up to Hilda.

If Claude hadn't left he probably would have done the same thing Marianne did. Nothing wrong with a tactical retreat every now and then..

*******

After getting time to adjust to his new house Ashe came to look forward to dinner time. It was always so lively; be it from Claude's valuable input of the day, Lysithea’s sharp comments, Hilda's gossip, Raphael’s loud laughter, Lorenz’s way of elegantly talking followed by Claude teasing one or two of them. He, along with Leonie, Ignatz and Marianne were more listeners than talkers, only commenting every now and then.

They were there to eat, but chatting over dinner was a fun pass time. And in a way it made them feel like a family. He's sure Lysithea would call it a dysfunctional one, but still a family.

Though tonight the absence of Ignatz didn't go past him or any of them. Raphael had said the young knight was going to eat later, but Ashe decided to task himself as the one to deliver him his food.

From one knight in training to another.

“Ignatz!”  


Said archer comes into view who seems surprised by Ashe’s appearance. Maybe it was odd seeing someone carrying a tray of food with them outside of the dining hall, but Ashe doesn't mind. All that mattered was making sure Ignatz took care of his health.

“Oh, hello Ashe.” Ignatz shifted awkwardly, as if trying to shield something from him. Was he displeased to see him? He didn't do anything to upset him, as far as he knew.

“Are you alright? You skipped dinner so I thought I'd..” Ashe’s train of thought comes to a stop once he spots a drop of pink liquid on the ground. A smile starts to bloom on his face. “Are you painting?”  


“Shh!” Ashe nearly jerks back, but manages not to drop the tray of food. What was there to be so discreet about?

“My apologies I didn't mean to startle you. I.. I am. There wasn't any clouds today so I thought it'd be the perfect chance to paint the scenery here in the courtyard.” Ignatz smiles sheepishly, setting down the supplies he hid on the bench.

Ashe joins the archer after he places the tray down on his lap. From what he can see the painting looks beautiful; orange and pink entwined around the monastery with a hint of stars indicating it was nearly dusk. The monastery was yet to be painted, but considering the background was the focus he understood why.

“It's not finished yet, but-”

“It's incredible!” Ashe exclaims and smiles at the pure surprise on Ignatz, who starts fumbling with his fork. “You've captured the atmosphere perfectly. It's really lovely Ignatz!”

“T-thank you! But it's nothing, just something I've been wanting to work on.” Ignatz hesitates before taking a bite. “Can you keep this just between us? I'm keeping up with my studies and everything I just wanted to..”

“Don't worry about it.” Ashe speaks softly earning a sigh of relief. He wouldn't press Ignatz too hard on why he'd hide such a talent, but he had his own reasons. He didn't want to discourage him in any way.

“Do you plan to work on anything else after this painting is done?” Okay, so his curiosity was getting the better of him. At least this was just a pure innocent question. He really would like to see more of Ignatz’s work.

“O-oh um, I thought I'd work on portraits. There's someone I've been wanting to sketch for awhile.” Judging by the blush on his face it was either someone personal or very close to Ignatz. That or he was just simply embarrassed.

“Oh? I'm sure whoever you draw will look wonderful.”  


Ignatz laughs nervously, shoveling down his food. Ah, the best way to avoid a topic. It was nice not being the flustered one for once, but he feels so curious as to who Ignatz was wanting to paint. Was it a crush?

So many possibilities!

“Hey guys!”

Their heads jerk up at an unusual eager Leonie. It was odd, but in a good way. Nothing really excited her much other than Jeralt.

“Something happen, Leonie?” Ashe tilts his head.

“Tomorrow we're going out with the professor to take down bandits! Our  _ first  _ real battle! Isn't it exciting?”  


Leonie remained unaware of the nervous exchange between Ashe and Ignatz. They had no real battle experience, only on what they had learned from their professor. It was much easier to hit a dummy than, you know, an  _ actual  _ person.

Going into battle and having to kill bandits.. It's something Ashe never thought of before.

And apparently now something he'd soon have to live through.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And on that note we (obviously) begin the fight on the next chapter! I'm pretty excited to write that part out! 
> 
> Thank you all so much for the comments & 100+ kudos! I know while I'm not the best writer I really appreciate that you all enjoy the story so far and I will try to continue with frequent updates! Again thank you all so much ahhh and thanks for reading! <3


	6. Red Canyon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashe finally experiences a battle.

As the professor confirmed, it was indeed their first real battle. There was such a mixed reaction from all of his classmates towards the current battle. It was hard aiming his bow at  _ living  _ people, but what else had he been practicing for other than defending his classmates, himself and the innocent?

It had to be done and that was that.

From the corner of his eye Marianne can be seen giving a quiet prayer to the bandit she had just finished off with her faith magic.   


It was unfortunate, but they all had their part to play. Especially with this group. Apparently it wasn't the first time Claude and their professor had encountered the bandits. And if this group was targeting their house leader then an act of mercy wouldn't do, as much as Ashe would just want to talk things through it's not all that easy.   


Reality could be harsh after all.

At least his mission at the moment was heading for the treasure chest the bandits had with them. He still had to fight any bandits that came into his range, but unlocking items was his specialty. Maybe it was just an act of mercy that the professor allowed him to do so instead of being sent in the heat of battle.

It was fairly easy unlocking the treasure chest and the amount of gold wasn't surprising to Ashe, but it made him feel a mix of anger and sadness. Anger over thinking how the bandits had come to get that loot and sadness for those killed over money.

As a former thief maybe he had no room to judge, but at least he didn't actually  _ kill  _ anyone over money or valuable objects.

“Where do you think you're going with our loot, brat!?”

Ashe gasps, jerking away from the chest as he stands up; bow not ready but an arrow already in his hand as he refuses to let his gaze leave the bandit, nor the sword he points towards him.

Ashe can hear the sound of clashing metal and magic bursting through the canyon, but this was  _ his  _ battle. He couldn't always rely on his allies to do his battles for him.   


Funny that Hilda believed in that yet from afar he could see her brutally slamming her axe down on the back of a bandit.   


As soon as he grabs his bow the foe in front of him begins to charge at him. With the arrow adjusted and his target getting closer his eyes close and he releases his fingers from the bow string allowing it to glide with ease.

A swift wind passes by Ashe as his own arrow knocks the bandit down to the ground with a direct hit to the chest.   


Something felt.. off. He could have sworn he had heard something fly by him.   


_ ‘Maybe I'm just hearing things.’ _

Either way his enemy was now down and out. Ashe should feel proud,  _ be  _ proud that he won his first battle, but..

“If I'd hesitated, that.. that would've been me.”

As he approaches the lifeless body his eyes widen at the scene not from shock, but for a different reason.

There was not one, but  _ two  _ arrows in the bandit’s chest.

*******

The fight continued on with ease. The sun blaring down on them didn't help stamina-wise, but Ashe still got a few hits in. Some not powerful enough to kill, and others managing to do their job.   


Goddess he was glad he was an archer. At least then he wouldn't have to get face to face with anyone. Close combat could be anxiety filled.   


Or maybe he was just thinking that way considering it was his first battle. Either way he was most comfortable with a bow in hand.   


It was somewhat terrifying to see the lead bandit, but it was comforting to attack from afar and let their teacher face the final thief.   


Being cautious Ashe lets his eyes wander around the canyon to confirm that their battle was nearly over. It was a good sign seeing everyone intact; some near their teacher to provide support if needed and the others keeping a safe distance like he was.

A yell of agony catches his attention, but not enough to make him look over. When he hears the faint sound of cheers Ashe finally looks up, but cringes at the blood soaked sword tip their professor wields.   


Ashe shakes his head and joins his classmates. Better the enemy than them.

He just had to keep reminding himself of that.

“I'd say that was a fine victory, wouldn't you?” Lorenz remains composed as ever, a satisfied smile gracing his lips.

“We all made it out unscathed so I'd say so.” Ashe glances over with a strained smile before going back to staring at the long, dirt filled path ahead of them.

“We did really work well as a team. I hope my band of mercenaries matches up well to our class.” Leonie chimes in.

Lysithea nods. “I can confirm no one was dragging their feet.”

“Man I'm pretty beat now! I hope we're gonna celebrate this win!” Raphael adds in, chipper as ever.

“And I really broke out in a sweat! Talk about feeling unsanitary.” Hilda makes a face of disgust.

“That new, strange feeling is what you call putting in effort.” Claude laughs as Hilda sticks her tongue out towards him. If anything he didn't seem all that tired as long as the day had been.   


“But I gotta admit we did a superb job. Even if something  _ did  _ happen I had a scheme or two up my sleeve.” It's odd really, finding himself smile at the mention of a scheme. Leave it to Claude to make him feel safe.

“Is that so..” Lorenz says dryly.

“Oh, don't you worry,” Claude places a hand on his heart and Ashe can't help but notice the quick glance Claude shoots him. “I'm always looking out for those dear to me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off sorry that this chapter was pretty short(and maybe pretty rushed), but I did try to end it on a light hearted note at least since there's an upcoming battle I wanna focus more on(my notes are so messy), but we'll be going back to a few more chapters of fluff before the storm comes 
> 
> Once again, thank you all so much for reading, leaving kudos & comments! I really appreciate them! <3


	7. Accessories & Cleaning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Helping out with whatever he could was a good distraction after their first battle.

After their first battle Ashe was well.. He was managing. It was still uneasy knowing he had blood on his hands, but everyone did now. Some coping more than others.   


Some peaceful moments were often spent praying with Marianne at the cathedral. The monastery was serene enough that he could let himself try to feel comfortable in his own skin again.   


Or maybe it was the people there. Goddess knows his classmates were a big help.

He found himself leaning on Hilda during the new month since she always had a thing or two for anyone to do. Claude may joke about her laziness, but Ashe didn't mind. She was doing her part for the team and he was happy to comply to minor errands. It helped keep his mind off of things anyway.

“Hilda?” Ashe knocked on her door, one hand preoccupied with a bag of glittering stones. “I got those rocks you wanted!”   


The door opens, revealing an eager Hilda. “Oh, Ashe! Don't just stand there, come on in! You are such an angel for making so many delivers.”   


The praise has him flustered, but he gladly accepts the offer. It was the first time he’s ever been in a dorm other than his own. The various accessories and flowers around the room certainly were eye catches.

“Your room is very lovely, Hilda.” His voice is gentle as he sets the bag down on her desk. “Were you going to use these for decorating?”

“Oh goodness no. They're for making accessories!” Hilda hums happily, removing her hands behind her back to reveal a braided necklace along with a small bottle at the end filled with resin; a purple flower resting inside the tiny object.

“That's- that’s very pretty, Hilda. Did you make that for yourself?”   


“Nope! It's for you. Go on, take it.”   


At that fact Ashe takes an unnecessary step back feeling uneasy again. She went through all that trouble just to make him something, yet he felt as if he didn't do much to deserve it.

“I don't think I can accept such an extravagant gift. I haven't really done much to deserve it.” Ashe begins to frown, but he can only blink when Hilda shoves the necklace into his hands.

“Now I won't have any of that! You're sounding like Marianne when I tried to give her a gift.” Hilda sighs and shakes her head. “You've been such a dear all week for me. Getting me items needed for accessories, cleaning up in the dining hall, pulling weeds, delivering notes.. You've done so much running it's starting to wear me out just from watching you!”   


“So please, accept it for all the hard work you've done.” Hilda's sweet, infectious smile has Ashe mirroring her expression as he rolls the necklace around in his hands. A reward and a token of their friendship.

“Well I.. Thank you, Hilda. You really did an amazing job with this.” The necklace rests perfectly around his neck with the purple matching nice against the blue of his hoodie.   


“Oh, it was nothing. Don't praise me it's weird when  _ I’m  _ not the one doing it.” Hilda bows her head sheepishly. “And I can't take all the credit. It was Claude's idea to begin with.”   


“Claude?” Confusion is now written all over his face.

“He told me not to overwork you and to lay off for a while and do my own chores. Really lecturing me-- actually are you okay?” Hilda's tone is one of worry as she inspects his face but Ashe quickly rids the expression by shaking his head.

“Oh, the dark circles? I'm surprised you noticed. I haven't been sleeping well is all. But I'm fine, really. Me helping you out has nothing to do with them.” Ashe reassures her with a smile, not wanting to tackle the topic of his sleeping habits. “As you were saying?”

“If you say so..” Hilda tilts her head before getting back their prior topic. “Claude knows I'm pretty good with making accessories and as I said he suggested it. He even got me all the ingredients I needed! Personally I would have added gems, but I didn't want to make it pop out  _ too  _ much since I'm not familiar with your tastes, but I have to say Claude was right. That violet does really match.”   


Ashe feels his chest swell; fingers gently wrapping around the small bottle. “It's my favorite flower actually.”   


“Oh, I know. Claude was the one who told me. Consider it a gift from the both of us.”

*******

“Cleaning up again, Cyril? Let me help out.”   


Trips to the library were always frequent for Ashe. He often saw Lysithea and got into the habit of leaving with her before nightfall. Sometimes Claude would tag along or they'd run into him as they were leaving. He envied Claude's courage, but maybe there weren't any ghosts.

That was still up for debate.. There was no way he was going to risk running into one!

Last week he happened to run into Cyril there; someone often busy around the monastery for the sake of Lady Rhea. Something about Cyril made Ashe see a little of himself in the younger boy. Before coming to the monastery Ashe often kept himself busy cleaning, cooking and gardening for Lonato. But Lonato was a kind man, always telling him not to overwork himself and giving him more than he needed.   


Him and his siblings were very blessed.

Helping out others was in his nature, it was only right to not let Cyril get exhausted before the sun had even set. Even if his help wasn't needed or that Cyril found it strange, it still wouldn't stop the archer from lending a hand.

“You don't have to keep helping me, I've got it. Now Claude is helping out too.” You'd think more help would be appreciated, but Cyril frowns at the addition. Ashe is the opposite, who perks up at the mention of his house leader.

“You called?” Claude's head appears from behind a bookshelf with his arms stacked with books. “Hey, Ashe! Did you get recruited into the cleaning crew too?”   


Cyril furrows his brows. “But you're here on your free will, ain't ya?”   


“Well, yes. But it  _ was  _ my fault that so many books fell over I figured I'd do my fair share.” Claude lets out an exasperated sigh, giving Ashe a pointed look. “Aren't you supposed to be taking it easy?”

“I'm hardly straining myself.” A gentle laugh passes his lips. “I heard Cyril was here so I thought I'd help out.”   


“Why?” That has both their attention, with the two turning towards the smaller boy. Cyril looked honestly puzzled that Ashe would go out of his way just to see him, just to help him.   


In a way it reminded him of how he used to be towards Claude. Confused and unaware of someone just wanting to be his friend.

“Nothing wrong with helping out a friend.” Claude says casually, putting away the books in his hands.

“That's right, Cyril. If you ever need any help you have your friends here. Just say the word.”   


Cyril is quiet after that statement, nothing unusual for him, but he returns to his work in silence anyway. It had Ashe smiling to himself as he wandered around the library, returning books to their rightful places. Even Claude considered him a friend, which meant they had to talk more than once before. Cyril was one of many words or few words depending on the topic.   


It piqued his interest as to what the two have talked about before. It was getting to be a bad habit, this curiosity of his. Not as bad as Claude's, but leaning that way.

A book falling to the ground catches Ashe’s attention who scurries over to pick up the object. His face lights up noticing the familiar cover with two knights on it, barely noticing Claude above him.   


“Mind giving me a hand?” Claude flashes a sheepish smile down at the freckled archer. Reaching up Ashe holds out the book, feeling their fingers brush at the exchange. For some reason it felt.. Odd. He's held hands before with his younger siblings and has had similar brief encounters, why should this be any different?   


_ ‘Goddess, I really don't want to be thinking about his fingers. Or hand holding. There's nothing special about them.’ _

“Um, Ashe?” Claude was already sliding down the ladder, eyes examining him with the familiar curious gleam, humor evident in his tone. “You alright there? You're as red as a tomato.”   


“Just.. Stuffy is all.” He really hated to lie through his teeth, but mentioning Claude barely touching him had him feeling weird on the inside? Yeah, that's something he wasn't intending on mentioning or admitting to anyone.  _ Ever.   
_

Claude shrugs, thankfully not pressing the matter any further, though his eyes still remain on Ashe. A smile graced his lips as his fingers lift up the accessory on his necklace.   


“I'm glad you liked your necklace, freckles.”   


Ashe can only sputter out a mumbled ‘thanks’ due to him becoming unfortunately and unusually tongue tied. If Claude wasn't holding on to the bottle he's sure he would have bolted.   


“I'm done now. Um, what are you two doing?” Cyril rounds the corner and halts in his steps, staring at the duo in confusion. The scenario was getting worse and worse by the seconds.

“We uh-  _ well _ -” Ashe remains to struggle, using both of his hands to push Claude’s hand back, unable to make a coherent sentence. Goddess,  _ help him. _

“Just admiring.” Claude lowers their hands and musters up a smile none too innocent, but it's good enough for Cyril. The boy doesn't bring up the subject, looking quite puzzled by their presence when he begins to turn away.   


“You guys are actin’ weird, but thank ya.” Cyril shakes his head and with that said and done the boy was gone, most likely on to his next set of chores to please lady Rhea.   


“Thanks for the hand, Ashe. Literally.” Claude laughs, swinging their hands for emphasis. Ashe can only open and close his mouth unsure on what to say or do. The internal struggle continues to triumph.

At least Cyril wouldn't tell anyone about what he witnessed. Ashe can barely process it himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ashe: No I do not want to hold Claude's hand, I should /not/ want to hold his hand   
Ashe, after accidentally holding Claude's hand: *internal screaming mixed with gay panic* 
> 
> Thank you all for reading, leaving comments & kudos! Hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	8. Stag's Birthday

The month was certainly flying by much more than the first two. Ashe was getting into the swing of things, finally feeling comfortable in his new house. Things were never dull around his colorful classmates that's for sure. No wonder Claude was always in good spirits, how could he not?

Everyone one of them had their own ambitions or hobbies, something just about everyone had, but Ashe was finally starting to connect the pieces.   


Leonie wanted to become a mercenary and make enough money to repay back her village. Raphael wanted to become a knight to protect his sister and make a living with his strength. Lorenz wanted to become a noble strong enough to protect his people. Lysithea wanted to absorb enough knowledge as she could, excelling in magic with each passing week.

He wasn't sure on the others ambitions, but he at least had down their hobbies. Hilda liked to make cute accessories, Ignatz loved to paint and Marianne was fond of talking to animals.   


Then there was Claude. Claude was an enigma himself; a puzzle yet to be solved or one that would never truly have every piece. From what all Ashe knew Claude had big plans for the land of Fódlan in the upcoming future along with mentioning something about reuniting everyone.   


Ashe didn't ponder over it too much because if Claude wanted to share his dreams and ambitions he would have done so already.   


Though for some reason Claude already had him figured out.   


It wasn't a secret he came here to become a knight. There were small parts he had personally shared with Claude and then there were ones he had never spoke of.

Nothing uneasy to feel about it, other than his fear of ghosts being out of the bag. Least Lysithea shared the fear. He probably shouldn't find comfort in that, yet he does.   


Oh well, nothing he could do about that. One cannot control their own feelings anyway.

Back to their house leader, Ashe was conflicted on him for another matter. That being his birthday. What are you supposed to even buy a noble? It was a struggle trying to figure it out.   


He thought Claude might like a nice book of poems. He did mention them being a favorite of his, so why not? But a book didn't feel like enough.   


Lucky for Ashe he had started growing chamomile leaves the moment Claude told him.   


And with his cooking and baking skills he could make some sweets to go with them. He's not even sure if Claude liked sweets all that much, or well as much as he and his sweet tooth did. But with the small bag of sugar cookies and tea leaves in one hand and the book in the other he wasn't going to back down.   


Claude could just throw them out if he didn't like them.   


_ ‘Now is not the time for pessimistic thoughts.’ _

Ashe breathes in slowly and exhales just as slow, taking his time to approach their class room. Ignatz tipped him off that Claude was looking over a map so it'd be the perfect opportunity to present him with his gift.   


“Claude?”   


The noble raises his head at his name being called, the familiar fond smile appearing on his face at Ashe’s presence.

“Hey there! What brings you here, my fawn?”   


“It's your birthday, isn't it? I-I made you something.” With his nerves kicking in again Ashe fumbles with the bag in his hand. Why was it so hard to give gifts? It was easy with his brother and sister. Then there was Lonato who liked just about anything he got him. But giving a friend who also happened to be a noble a gift? A true struggle.

Claude's full attention was on him too, which wasn't helping all that much. Cold feet finally make it to the table with clumsy hands laying the book down with two small bags on top of it.

“You really went out of your way for me, huh? How gracious of you.” Claude grins ear to ear, a hand on his heart before he picks up the book. “‘Paradise Lost’? Sounds very uplifting.”   


Ashe gentle laughs as he sits down across from Claude. “It's a book of poems. I thought you might like to read it in your spare time.” And not to mention he got a really good deal on it. His bargaining skills were still superior.

“You remembered that little detail? How sweet of you.”   


_ ‘Yet he remembers so many minor things about myself.’  _ Ashe muses to himself, giving Claude a sheepish smile.

“Did you really make me  _ deer  _ shaped cookies?” Claude's astonishment has Ashe ducking his head as if he’s unsure if his tone is a good thing or bad thing. Did he mess up already?

“I-it took me a couple of tries to get the shapes right,” Which meant he got to keep the deformed cookies, which was a win-win in its own way. “But if you don't like them I can throw them out-”

Ashe immediately closes his mouth and sinks a little low in his seat at the sound of crunching. He most likely wasn't going to get the cookies back either considering Claude was holding them close to himself.

“These are pretty good!” Claude exclaims, talking with his mouthful. He can already hear Lorenz in his mind saying that's unfit for a noble, but it lightens Ashe up. Did he actually succeed?

“These taste different though, like there's a kick to it.” Claude says after finishing his cookie.   


“Oh I just added in a few spices is all. I didn't know what your take on sweets are so I mixed it up a bit. I'm glad you enjoy them.”  _ Very  _ glad. Actually, more like relieved. He fretted over them so much to make the perfect gift for Claude.  
  
Er, maybe not perfect. Bear with him, he was doing his best.

“And tea leaves to go with them? You're spoiling me more than my family does.” Claude merely smiles and rests his head on the palm of his hand. That was a curious statement.. Claude usually brought up his family every blue moon.

“Really? I know it's not much and I wasn't sure what to get you, so I apologize-”   


“Stop right there,” A sigh escaped his lips. “I know it's hard to buy for a charming, noble scamp like myself, but I mean it when I say I  _ like  _ the gifts. From the bottom of my golden heart.”   


Ashe blinks and can't find it in himself to look back up at the sincere smile on his house leader’s face. The fact that he did something right, that Claude actually liked the presents made happiness bloom within him. It was a cheesy way to put it, but knowing that the effort put in wasn't wasted made him not think anymore of it.

Not like he'd be voicing his emotions anyway.

“You should have tea with me sometime, that way we can put these leaves to use.” Claude speaks with confidence as if he knew Ash would comply.   


And who was he kidding of course he'd tag along.   


“T-that sounds great!” Ashe stands up abruptly and does a quick bow that has Claude giving him a funny look. He was in such a good mood that he didn't even stress on the way his voice cracked.   


“Leaving already? Thanks for the gifts, freckles.” Maybe it was his imagination but he could have sworn Claude sounded the least bit disappointed.   


It was probably just his mind playing tricks on him.

“Of course. And happy birthday, Claude!” Ashe closes his eyes briefly giving Claude a warm smile which equally matched his mood.   


_ ‘Success!’ _

As he made his way out of their classroom he had a new spring in his step. His first gift to a friend went swimmingly! He had every reason to rejoice. A small, pure victory for him. 

  
  


  
  
The rest of the day is spent quietly fishing; a peaceful activity that was both relaxing and exciting. None of his classmates were around, other than the glance of one passing by every so often. His mind lingers on thinking if he should have stayed with Claude or not.    
  
As important as Claude is Ashe’s sure he’d rather spend his birthday with others than him. He wasn’t as close to Claude and wasn’t from the Leicester Alliance to begin with.   
  
But at least he enjoyed what little gifts he had brought to the table. And that? That was good enough for Ashe.   
  
The water is still and dinner time draws near, indicating it was time to leave for the day. A curious conversation draws Ashe in as he puts away his fishing pole; the two girls mumbling about a rebellion, unaware of his eavesdropping. 

  
“Do you know who's leading it?” The girl asks though her tone suggests she was ready to drop the subject. It was an uneasy one. And a rebellion against the church? Who would go that far and why? Who would have any reason to attack the church in the first place?

“From what I heard, it's a man that goes by the name Lonato.”   


Ashe’s heart dropped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I end it abruptly on this chapter? Probably so yeah. You can imagine that the next chapter isn't going to be very pretty, but it's finally time to tackle that. 
> 
> Also ahhhhhh, thank you all so very much for the 200+ kudos!! Can't believe you all enjoy this rare pairing, I'm like 1000% glad to see & hear that!! Hope you enjoyed this chapter and once again, thank you all for the kudos, comments & reading! <3


	9. Lonato

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Major spoilers for in-game chapter 3, along with minor spoilers for in-game dialogue between a few certain characters.

_ There must be some mistake. _   
  
A thought that kept repeating itself constantly in his head as the civilians approached. Each second worse than the last. He wanted to sprint off into the fog to _ find _ Lonato and demand the meaning of this senseless violence.   
  
But he couldn’t. Running out alone would just get himself killed even if the opposing team knew he was the son of Lonato. Adoptive son, but Lonato had treated him like his own blood. Why was this happening? 

The fog made everything more nerve wrecking. What if one of his arrows ended up hitting Lonato? He didn’t intend on hurting him, he couldn’t. The church sent them out here to stop the rebellion but he actually knew these people. Do you know how hard it is to point an arrow at someone you recognize?   
  
Even his classmates were uneasy about attacking villagers brought into a fight that shouldn’t have happened in the first place. It still didn’t stop his class from taking them down, one by one. As much as it pains him he knew this was another life or death situation.   
  
But damn it, he was going to see Lonato.   
  
From the side an enemy archer can be seen pointing their bow at Marianne who’s busy healing Lysithea. Ashe’s frown deepens. Did they not understand that they’re aiming at students? He may have known these people from his village but he’d be damned if he’d let them kill his friends.   
  
Green eyes narrowed at the foe with the release of his bow string, but his eyes can’t look at the scene anymore. He heard the body fall and now it was time to move forward. That’s how each battle is supposed to be, isn’t it? The force of reality twisted in his gut. 

Arrows are sent after his hesitation, only when the fog begins to clear that he can begin to focus on why he’s made it this far on the battlefield.   
  
From afar he can barely make out Catherine, cutting down enemy soldiers exchanging muffled words to Lonato. With more enemies being sent out from Lonato they can't quite reach him yet. It's sickening to see his adoptive father sit back on his steed as more _ villagers _are sent out to be slaughtered. 

They're all very devoted to Lonato, but if Ashe were on that side he wouldn't be able to partake in this meaningless fight. The reason was still unknown and he knows either way he will not like the answer he receives.

There was sympathy in his eyes, yet there was rage within him anytime he spotted an enemy pointing their weapons towards his classmates. He could feel his hesitation slip away with each enemy he shot at. They were too young to die. Did Lonato really not care he was attacking students?

“You! I will be the one to kill you, no other!” Lonato’s voice boomed from atop his horse; tone full of anger. That was enough to make Ashe pause in his steps, a shiver running down his spine. From the years he's lived with Lonato he's never heard the man use such a harsh tone towards _ anyone _.

“You have lost all sense of justice. You want to fight me? So be it. I’ll send you to meet your goddess.”

_ No. _

Breath caught in his throat Ashe uses whatever strength he had left to sprint to the front lines. Sounds of protest from a few of his classmates were heard and discarded. Even Catherine was surprised to see him running foolishly in front of her from the upcoming battle.

No, he could stop this. It didn't have to end this way.

_ It can't end this way. _

“Lonato!” His breathing is harsh and his eyes sting with the tears he tries to hold back. Lonato looks taken aback by his appearance, but his expression is soon steeled.

“Stand down, Ashe. I must destroy these evil-doers by any means necessary!”   
  
_ No, no, no. _

“Please surrender, Lonato! Whatever your reasons for doing this, we can still talk it out!” Ashe’s voice was full of desperation. They _ needed _ to talk this out. There was so much blood on his hands now, there was no going back from that. But Lonato? He could still stop this.

He had to.

“Rhea is an infidel who has deceived the people and desecrated the goddess! We have virtue and the goddess herself on our side!”   
  
So this stunt, this _ bloodshed _ did have something to do with Christophe. Christophe was branded a traitor during the tragedy of Duscur and sent to the church for execution. He could see why Lonato had a grudge with Catherine considering she was the one who detained his brother. 

“Even if all that’s true, dragging the townsfolk into it like this isn’t right!” Ashe’s brother was nothing but kind and supportive towards him after Lonato had took them all in. Christophe was a terrific older brother who was always there to cheer him on, no matter the cause. He could never imagine his brother being caught up in such awful affairs.

And knowing his brother he wouldn't want Lonato to avenge him. Not in this way.

“Enough. If that is how you feel, prepare yourself! I’m putting an end to this!”

It was over. It felt that way, with Lonato’s lance pointed towards him. This wasn't his adoptive father anymore. The person in front of him was nothing more than a man consumed by revenge and grief.

“Get back, kid.” Catherine pushes past him and all Ashe can do is watch in horror. Someone had grabbed his arm, guiding him away from the fight, but he couldn't look away.

The only time he's seen Lonato take up arms was when he was sparring. But this? This fight was filled murderous intent.

Thunderbrand was sent swinging dangerously close to Lonato. Each swing making his heart stop. She wasn't going to take him alive. There was no more talking this out.

And when Catherine slashed down a bolt of lightning onto his father his scream was lost in the thunder that came with it.

Remaining forces either retreated or were killed by their hands. The battle field was eerily quiet and his legs gave out from the sight in front of him.

Lonato’s lifeless body laid on the ground, blood soaking the grass..

“Lonato, I..”

.. And the light left Ashe’s eyes as tears blurred the rest of his vision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is actually my first time writing this sort of stuff and well, phew. We're gonna head into some aftermath stuff next time, and excuse me while I go lay down for awhile 
> 
> Thank you all for the kudos, comments & for reading! <3


	10. Tattered Heart

_ Everything after his adoptive father’s death was a blur, but felt painfully slow. Raphael had to practically drag him away from the morbid scene. His classmates sent sympathetic looks his way as he took shaky steps from the one who meant the world to him.  
_

_ Hollow eyes were directed towards the ground, refusing to look at anyone; not wanting his tear soaked face to be seen. The hardest part was trying to break the news to his siblings. What would they think, knowing their brother was part of the group that led to Lonato’s demise?  
_

_ Innocent eyes stared at him, both happy to see him yet.  
_

_ Yet he had to be the bearer of bad news. _

_ The church from their town was kind enough to take them in. They no longer had to live back on the streets, but it still pained him. Everything did. Everyone in the village was so kind to him and he.. _

_“Where’s Lonato, brother?”_

  
  
Ashe wakes up to find sweat soaked bangs sticking to his forehead, heart racing and tears already forming. Another nightmare, another replay of what he had to live through.

Ashe curled his legs up to his chest. It was a shadow that would always hang over his head.

Daytime was always a luxury to him, but he can't find it in himself to leave his room. Not yet, not now. A week passed by with him keeping himself locked up in his room, unable to face his friends. Unable to face the world. Byleth said there was nothing to be done and he could take all the time he needed.

By now he's sure there's stacks of homework and chores to do, but he can't find it himself to stress over something that felt so meaningless now. He dreamed of graduating, becoming a knight and going back home to show his family how far he went.

It all seemed so small now.

Despair reeked in his room; and maybe even himself. There were rare times when he left, most of which were to collect the food tray one or more of his classmates would leave by his door.

Not like he ate much anyway. He could barely stomach the food, feeling knots in his stomach with each bite he swallowed. Like the fight with Lonato he was feeling useless pretty useless.

The scene of Lonato pointing his lance towards him played constantly in his head. Was Lonato actually going to fight him? Would he have killed him? Yes, no, maybe. All he knew was that, that wasn't his father in the moment. If it were he wouldn't have started the rebellion to begin with.

The Lonato he knew would never do something so foolish, so why..

Why did he do it? What set him off?

Not like he'd find out anytime soon. The church was fretting over the assasionation plot planned against Rhea, found on a note that his father carried with him. Maybe he'd find out one day, yet it felt out of reach much like everything else at the moment.

As much as he _ hated _ enclosed spaces he knew he'd have to join his classmates sooner or later. What would they think seeing him like this? Probably a poor excuse for a student.

Ashe lets out a shaky sigh. No, they wouldn't be _ that _ harsh. Still, he wasn't in the best condition for well, _ anything. _

_ ‘I'm a miserable mess is what I am.’ _

Running a hand through his disheveled hair a knock on the door jolts the archer from his place on the bed. His sleep schedule was such a mess he didn't even know it was time to eat.

Yet the knocking insists. Whoever was at the door was persistent to get his attention. Usually they'd knock and leave the food. Was something urgent happening to the monastery? Surely they would have said so without needing to see him-

“Ashe?”

Ashe freezes. Why was Claude seeing him? Ignatz and Lorenz were the ones who left him a meal everyday, so why was their house leader doing it? Guilt swelled in his chest. Claude had better things to do than this.

With another sigh Ashe pushes himself up and off the bed and unlocks the door, but not opening it fully. Claude's eyes widen with shock, a frown on his face yet that carefree, laid back smile is quick to appear as if trying to mask the surprise of seeing Ashe in such a state. Ashe doesn’t mind it though. He’s used to seeing the default expression that most others were used to or charmed by.

“Thought I was gonna have to get Raphael to knock down your door there for a second.”

It was meant as a joke, but he couldn't help feeling like a burden at the moment.

“I'm-”

“Pardon me.” Claude hums to himself, intentionally cutting him off.

Ashe blinks. First his apology got interrupted and now Claude had managed to push his way into his cluster of a room; a plate balanced on his other hand and the other on Ashe’s shoulder.

He didn't actually intend on staying, did he?

“Come sit with me. Yours truly has graced you with a divine dish.” As clouded as Ashe’s head has been the past week the invitation to dinner sounded if anything, the most domestic thing he's done this month. Not to mention the dish _ did _smell good..

Tired eyes stared at the dish now sitting on his lap with Claude looking at him expectantly. It shouldn't be a big deal to him, but the fact that Claude made him dinner, his _ favorite _ at that, made tears start to form in the corners of his eyes.

“It's safe to eat, I promise. I know a lot of people are wary when I'm in the kitchen.. I wonder why that is? Now I'm not sure about the taste, however this _ was _ my second attempt so I know for a fact that it is indeed better than the first disaster.”

Ashe doesn't reply, though his stomach does with a growl. Claude made roasted pheasant with berry sauce just for him. The dish was pretty troublesome, Ashe knows considering his days spent at Lonato’s restaurant.

Quickly rubbing away the tears Ashe picks up the fork taking a small bite and closes his eyes at the rich flavor. It tasted better than the one the dining hall served.

“You like it?” Ashe nods in response as his hunger takes over. “I knew you would. Not many get to try my cooking. Take that any way you like, I know you're opinion on me is nothing but nice.”

And it was honestly. Claude was sneaky and a schemer, but those weren't necessarily bad things. If anything it made him a great tactician. Great skills to have for a future leader too.

“Leonie did the hunting, Lysithea found the recipe, Raphael disposed the first attempt and I did the rest. As for the mess, well..”

Ashe listens to Claude's chatter fill the room as he fills his stomach. Going a week without hearing the silence be filled was something he now realizes he'd rather not live through again.

His mind was clouded, but listening to Claude talk about the Golden Deer kitchen mishap was making his mind finally go silent. He forgot how nice it was just being in the presence of a friend. Claude’s calm, yet upbeat presence was a nice contrast to his heavy heart.

Claude wears a look of satisfaction after moving Ashe’s now empty plate to the side. Ashe wasn't sure what to expect honestly. Claude usually did his own thing so him leaving or staying after the meal was a coin toss.

“You know, we've missed you.” Claude says, his eyes cast upon the ceiling. “I can't imagine what you're going through. Everyone here, we've all had our struggles, but with us, with _ me _ you don't have to carry those burdens alone.”

“I don't wish for you all to know the feeling of losing family. I would rather carry them alone then let you know how suffocating it is.”

“Maybe you've forgotten, but the golden deer is your family too. Your dysfunctional one, but we're working on that. I just want you to know we're all here for you, no matter what happens.”

The room falls silent as Ashe mulls the words over in his head. It was clear there were some in his class who also had burdens, but now he can see Claude is acting how Ashe would to anyone else. Checking up on others and wanting to help them out the best they could; a nice trait they both shared.

Marianne hardly ever smiled, Ignatz was iffy about becoming a knight, Lysithea _ had _to constantly study. Ashe wanted to find a way to help ease their troubles despite not knowing what exactly they were.

And now Claude was doing the same as him. Except it was obvious to why he was distressed.

“Do you think he would have killed me?” It's sudden, it's probably obscure to hear judging by the incredulous look Claude gives him, but to Ashe it's a question that's been on repeat in his head ever since the battle.

Claude did want him to open up too. He could at least give him a glimpse into his depressive mind if that would help anything.

“Nah.” Now it's Ashe’s turn to give him the odd look. “You weren't the one he was after. It was clear that Catherine was his target, but you? I don't think he expected to see you out there. You were unaware of what he had planned and he left you out of the loop for a reason.”

“Sure, it could have been that he knew you'd try to stop him, but don't you think it'd make it harder if he hurt his own son intentionally before the rebellion? In the heat of the moment he could have knocked you unconscious with his lance at best.”

The hand now resting above his squeezes in a way that was soothing. Ashe can only stare at Claude, mind no longer foggy, but the what if’s remaining.

Catherine _ was _behind him during their confrontation but maybe the lance pointed out was meant for her and not him. He'd like to believe so anyway. Though he’d rather the weapon not be pointed out at anyone.

“I.. Thank you, Claude. I'm sorry you had to see me in such.. Such a shattered state.” While his heart was still heavy from the loss it felt at least lighter now. Still battered and bruised, but managing.

“Don't sweat it. I hope to see you back at class though. Everyone really wants to see you.” Ashe receives a warm smile, starting to feel warm himself. The others, his classmates, his _ friends _. He wanted to see them with high spirits again. That was a reach, he knew it’d take time to get over his loss, but seeing them would put him more at ease. If seeing Claude made him feel better than he had been he could only imagine how seeing the rest of his friends would affect him.

“I must have a ton of work to catch up on..”

“You haven't missed out on much. I mean Lysithea is still short and staying up past her bedtime. Teach still has the face of a statue. Hilda hasn't lifted a finger, you know how it is.”

Claude rolls his eyes in an affectionate matter, causing Ashe to laugh at the antics. Er, the usual. It certainly sounded like they weren't up to much. And the fact that they missed him, well he couldn't keep the waiting now, could he?

Even if he had to swallow his emotions he'd leave the confinement of his room. Finally, a smile starts to find its way on his lips.

“There it is,” Claude's voice is now unusually soft, but Ashe embraces the comfort he finds in it. He always did and always will. “The smile I’ve come to miss.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter ended with a slap in the face, this one is ending with a warm embrace. Our boy is still gonna go through some internal struggles(of course), but he's got his other family(his herd) helping him pick up the pieces
> 
> Thank you all again for the kudos, comments & for reading! <3


	11. Slow & Steady

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashe returns to class.

Returning after a week made Ashe feel down right anxious. He still wasn’t looking his best; dark circles under eyes, yet they still had a certain shine to them and his form still needing time to adjust after barely leaving his room.   


That was okay though. He could still pick up the pieces. Mentally he felt better, physically he was still alright and his goal was still set on being a knight. All in all he was coping well enough to interact with his classmates again.   


_ His friends.   
_

The faintest hint of a smile is on Ashe’s face just before he enters the Golden Deer classroom, books in hand and his priorities set on catching up. He’s not sure why, but he felt a sudden shyness creep up on him upon being the last to enter.

Especially when all eyes were on him.

If his hands weren’t preoccupied he would have gripped his necklace out of habit.

“Looks like you decided to rejoin the herd after all. Nice to have you back, freckles.” At the sound of Claude’s voice Ashe’s heart warms and his eyes scrunch up at the warm welcome.   


At least it  _ was  _ warm until Raphael picked him up in an almost smothering bear hug.   


“Ashe! You’re so thin that I could snap you in half!”   


“Whoa there! You might actually do so too!” Ashe is thankful for Claude’s quick aid who gives him a pat on the back.

“Don’t worry,” Ignatz gives him a sympathetic smile, helpfully handing over the books Ashe had dropped before the surprise hug. “He does the same thing to me when I don’t eat a lot or skip out on meals.”   


_ ‘Well, I guess it’s not necessarily a bad thing.’  _ He muses to himself. Raphael did have a big brother vibe to him as well.

“It’s nice to see you back, Ashe.” Lysithea offers a small smile, along with a pile of papers. Scratch that a  _ stack  _ of papers.

“W-what are all these?”   


“Notes I wrote down while you were absent last week. You may have them since I have all that knowledge stored in here.” There was a hint of pride in her voice as Lysithea tapped the side of her head. It did impress him how she could be capable of storing so much knowledge considering he forgot certain subjects after a fair or short amount of time had passed.   


At least he had other subjects he excelled in, but the gesture was still appreciated.

“I thought you said I didn’t miss much.”   


Claude merely shrugs and smiles towards his wary expression. “Nothing too important.”

“Are you kidding? Professor taught us some incredible magic last week! How could you say that’s not important!”   


Ah, magic. Claude was right then.  _ They  _ didn’t miss out on much, considering him, Ignatz and his class leader were archers.

“Unless it’s not related to bow training I’m sure Claude isn’t too concerned.” Leonine says as she steps in between the two. At least someone was helping hold down the forte.

“Oh, I disagree on that. I’m interested in  _ many  _ things. Magic isn’t one of them, but I’d rather not be turned to dust either.” Understandable. _ Very  _ understandable. Lysithea looked like she wouldn’t mind throwing around a few spells. Thank the Goddess she was on their side.

“I’d say it’s refreshing to see you back in better spirits,” Lorenz speaks up and adjusts his rose. “I took the liberty of placing a rose on your table. Now I wasn’t aware you’d be back today, so I did so for every day you were absent. I say it adds elegance and lightens up the atmosphere. Wouldn’t you say so, Ashe?”   


Ashe takes a moment to process the words until he turns his attention to his usual seat to see a red rose nestled neatly in a small vase. The gesture makes him smile by how polite it was.

“Ashe, you poor thing,” Hilda leans forward, fixing his messy bangs. “If you need anything just feel free to ask! I probably won’t be doing it personally, but I can find someone willing to lend a hand to us delicate flowers.”   


_ ‘Us?’  _ He was hardly as ‘delicate' as Hilda was. His heart was still a little fragile over recent events, but he wasn’t sure if that was a compliment or not. It’s something he’d have to toss around with later.

“Um, I know it’s not much, but I prayed to the Goddess for you.. And Dorte wishes you well.” Marianne pipes up. It confuses Ashe to who Dorte is, but the well wishes was at least nice from Marianne’s mystery friend. Maybe he could even meet him sometime.

“And if you’re up for it, maybe we could go hunting together sometime. Or I could go get you something in case you’d rather cook. Claude said it’s one of your favorite hobbies anyway.” Hunting with Leonie sounded kinda fun, but she was right. He’d rather do the cooking than the killing. In fact he hasn’t even touched his bow in awhile..

Ashe’s eyes wander around the classroom, his expression softening at the relieved and happy faces of his friends. The fact that they cared so much for him made him feel light; a warm smile blooming on his face.   


“Thank you all so much. It’s.. It’s great to be back. I’ll do my best.” As their classmate, their friend and future knight he wanted to make sure that those faces never lost such brilliant smiles.

Even Byleth, the stoic of them all, showed a hint of a smile to him before their lecture began.

*******

After class Ashe didn’t have a moment to himself. Not that he was complaining, but the others really didn’t need to fret over him as much as they did. Maybe it was appropriate to treat him like glass, but it was highly unnecessary. Claude was the only one who didn’t hover around him, but then again Ashe was used to him being around so much and then being gone before he knew it. Actually that went both ways. Though being the center of attention was a bit overwhelming..   


So it was a nice change of pace when he got to have some alone time in the greenhouse. Everyone was getting ready for dinner which meant it’d most likely be empty. Was it odd to know the silent greenhouse schedule?    
  
Probably so. Oh well.

He expected his tea leaves and flowers were wilted, but fortunately someone was kind enough to tend to them. Some were even ready to harvest, which was confusing since he figured they’d just take the plants.   


“Thought I’d find you here.”   


Ashe is startled by the sudden appearance, but he quickly calms down upon realizing it’s only Claude.   


“Hey there, Claude. Something you need?” Ashe stands up, dusting off his hands after putting away the bag of tea leaves he retrieved. The flowers still remained there; something he’d get up early in the morning to give to his classmates. A flowery thank you for their warm welcome to him.

“Just came to retrieve you. It’s almost dinner time and judging by Lysithea’s good mood they’re probably having something sweet. Figured you’d want in on that.” Claude winks, nodding his head to the door. Sweets? He  _ definitely  _ wanted in on that. Ashe jogs over to Claude and walks along with him. It felt like it’d been such a long time since they went on a stroll together.

“I didn’t mean for you to come and get me,” Ashe quickly apologizes. “But I was just..” Ashe fumbles with his words. Why was it so hard to form proper sentences today?   


“Getting some you-time put in? You looked pretty worn out from being smothered with affection by our dear classmates.” Claude’s grin is lopsided and Ashe feels his face burn. Unlike Claude he really was an open book. On the upside it made it easier for others to understand him.   


…

Er, at least his mind was slowly getting back on track with being positive.

“Me-time, yes. Don’t get me wrong, I really appreciate what they did for me! I just wanted to get a moment to myself. My heart may be pretty fragile, but I’m not. Uh, completely I guess.” Sighing, he rubs the back of his head. It still hurts to think about Lonato, but it was something only time could heal.   


“I getcha. Being the center of attention is nice once in awhile, huh?” Ashe tries to ignore the way his ears burn at Claude’s laughter.   


“While it can be overwhelming, I guess it can be okay every now and then.” Ashe chuckles, feeling sheepish. “Oh! Did someone in class tend to my plants? They were very well maintained.” If anyone would know it’d be Claude. Uh, probably. He’s not sure how often Claude actually came to the greenhouse, but his information on anything and anyone seemed as if it were endless.

“Well I  _ could  _ make it a fun guessing game or let you assume, but I’ll give you a break just this once. Your charming leader here did it.” Was it possible for someone to sound so playful despite being serious? Claude pulled it off swimmingly.

“What’s with that surprised look, freckles? I happen to grow my own special plants out there.” It was hard to imagine a noble tending to plants, but he should know better than to assume what nobles did by now.

“You mean those suspicious looking mushrooms growing near the back of the greenhouse?” Ashe doesn’t bother hiding his smile at the brief look of shock on Claud face. They were well hidden, but he managed to find them anyway.   


“Caught red handed it seems. Those suspicious mushrooms are what I use to make.. Potions.” There was a mischievous vibe to Claude’s words, but Ashe also knows better than to question what the potions are. He’s just glad he doesn’t have to experience them firsthand.

“I-I see.. Um, but thank you Claude. For tending to my plants I mean.” The gratitude is sincere, but Ashe wasn’t sure if he could praise Claude for possibly poisoning their enemies.   


Maybe so if it meant saving their lives. Thanking their leader for taking the time to make dangerous potions out of the mushrooms he lovingly cared for.   
_  
What an odd thing to thank him for.’_

“No sweat. It’s definitely better than having to pick weeds,” He could certainly agree with that. “Of course I’d look out for anything important to you. Uh, even if it is just plants.” There it is again that warm feeling. Something about Claude made him feel comfortable; safe. Perhaps the fact that Claude tended to reassure him he had his back it was well.. It was nice.   


He wanted to be someone Claude could count on too.

Ashe stumbles a bit and is surprised, though mostly flustered, when Claude wraps his arms around him to help him up. Lost in thoughts again about Claude, he really needed to get a grip.   


“Careful there.”

Though the only thing he was gripping now was Claude’s hand, or well Claude was the one gripping his. Another conflicting awkward hand holding situation that’s just what he needed.   


_ ‘Let’s try not to overthink this again. What a knight I’d be.’   
_

“-Ashe? You keep zoning out on me.” For some reason Claude appears to be amused by that fact. Oh Goddess he one hundred percent  _ is  _ an open book. A flustered freckled open book.

“Is this okay?” Claude swings their hands together for emphasis.   


_ ‘Yes.’  _ Ashe thinks a little  _ too  _ quickly for his liking. Embarrassment aside it was oddly comforting and rather domestic. It was okay for two friends to hold hands, wasn’t it? Surely Claude was just doing so to make sure he didn’t trip over his own feet like a fawn learning how to walk.

“Y-yeah, I guess.” He coughs. “Is this your way of ‘smothering me with affection’?” The fact that he can joke around now while remaining mostly calm was a step forward, right? It’s the only thing he can grasp at the moment. Er, other than Claude’s hand. At least he didn’t accidentally ignite it.    
  
“Oh believe me, there are many other ways I could do so. I think this is the only one you can handle.” Ashe finds himself laughing along with Claude; their laughter soft and sweet. Ashe can’t place the feeling, but something about Claude’s comment..    
  
No. Maybe.. Maybe just this once he won’t overthink things and carry on.    
  
“So you mentioned something about sweets?”    
  
His heart feels light for the first time since their last mission. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the slow update, last week was really busy for me and I'll try to update at least once or twice a week, sorry again ;; 
> 
> In the meantime here's some fluff! I'm unsure if I should include the next in-game chapter other than mentioning a lot of important information on it since I'm not very good at writing fighting scenes(they all look anime in my head but writing them is a whole `nother thing). I dunno, I'll figure it out. 
> 
> Thank you all again for the comments, kudos & for reading! <3


	12. Hero of Daphnel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers for in-game chapter 4 at the beginning.

The month had passed before Ashe knew it and while time hasn’t completely healed his wounds he did have to get back with the program and go on another mission with his class. It was.. An interesting one to say the least.   


Apparently the note they found on Lonato about the assassination plot towards Rhea turned out to be true. For the battle to be on sacred grounds too, that did not go well with the archbishop.   


It was odd having to participate in a battle underground near a holy tomb. Even more eerie when someone called the, “Death Knight” appeared.   


_ “I’m getting a really disturbing vibe from that guy.. No one go near the evil-looking knight, ok?” _

Claude’s advice was well taken. In fact the terrifying knight didn’t even leave his post to come fight any of them. It’d take months or even years to get to his level of expertise. Or maybe that was just his fear talking, but staying clear of him was another priority.

There was no fatal wounds, only minor scrapes and bruises on him and his classmates. Though to everyone’s confusion their teacher was somehow able to wield the sword of the creator. It glowed brilliantly in the dark tomb and was enough to put an end to the failed assassination plot.

It infuriated Ashe upon hearing it was the Western Church who spurred Lonato on and to his eventual demise. They  _ used  _ him like some pawn in their game. Those who didn’t meet their end soon did by Rhea and while it should comfort him that in some sort of way Lonato got a  _ bit  _ of justice it was still discomforting to know how the Central Church didn’t hesitate when it came to the death penalty.

Goddess if Lonato didn’t meet his end on the battlefield then could he have..

“What’s with the storm in your eyes, my friend?”

Ashe fixes his posture not realizing he had been slumped over his table. Class had ended awhile ago but he remained behind to catch up on his work. It wasn’t unusual to find Claude in there every now and then.   


“Oh, Claude. I was just lost in thought. It’s nothing, really.” Ashe musters up a smile to the skeptical look he gets in return. While it  _ was  _ something it wasn’t a topic he should be dwelling on in the first place. The Western Church got payback for their schemes and he had to leave it at that.   


“Don’t get too lost in there we all need you on this side of the world. Though I’m not really one to talk since I often get lost in the swamp that is my mind.” Claude shakes his head before plopping down in the chair next to him. The company is welcomed in the former dull classroom. He forgot how lively it could be when his colorful classmates were there.   


“So what brings you here? You didn’t come to retrieve me, did you?”   


“You’re free to do as you please, I on the other hand, well.. Just here for personal reasons.” It’s all Claude will give him to go off on other than the wink that follows it. No matter the reason he’s just grateful for the presence of another.

“This might be a stretch but have you ever been to the Leicester Alliance?” What a curious question. Part of him wonders why Claude would bring up his homeland and the other curious if anything was going to follow.   


“Can’t say I have. My family has always been in Gaspard. It’s located in the southern region of the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus so I’m afraid it’s quite some ways away from the Leicester Alliance.”

“I figured as much. Well that being said would you like to?” If Ashe thought Claude’s previous question was surprising this one certainly caught him off guard. Honestly he’s never even thought about it or seeing the world in general. The idea  _ was  _ appealing..

“There you are, boy. I shouldn’t be surprised that you’d sneak off while you were packing.”

Ashe barely misses the way Claude winces as his eyes trail over to the unfamiliar tone. A woman with brunette haired tied into a ponytail stands by the doorframe looking tired and possibly annoyed. Huh, he’s never seen her around before.

“Er, I haven’t been gone  _ too _ long now. What kind of friend  _ and  _ leader would I be without saying goodbye to my classmates?” The woman hardly looks fazed by the explanation, merely sighing before entering the classroom.   


“And would you use that same excuse when explaining why you were late to the meeting?” Goddess if his eyes weren’t deceiving him. Claude was actually  _ pouting _ . Ashe has to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling or laughing.   


Claude exhales loudly but stands anyway with Ashe standing as well. He’d begin to feel awkward if he remained seated. While the lady seemed intimidating she did have a way of yanking Claude’s chain and let’s face it practically no one could pull that off.

“Ashe, this is Judith-“   


“ _ Lady _ Judith.”   


“-Er, right. She’s the Hero of House Daphnel.”   


“She-“   


Claude began to speak once more, but Judith was already intervening. “No need to go on, boy. You were already a nuisance when it came to introducing me to your teacher.”   


“It’s nice to meet you, Lady Judith. I’m Ashe, Claude's friend. I won’t keep you two.” Ashe smiles softly, giving a slight bow.

“I’m surprised little Claude was able to befriend someone with actual manners. I guess opposites attract.” Claude let’s out a small huff and- Was his eyes deceiving him again? Twice in one day? It appeared as if Claude was embarrassed judging by the light blush on his face. Color him surprised Claude was in his shoes for once!   


“Let's get going, boy.”   


“Oh, right.” Claude turns to Ashe giving him a.. Sympathetic look? What’s this all about? It was even more concerning when he rested a hand on his shoulder. “I have to leave to attend the next roundtable conference. The old man isn’t feeling well so I gotta fill in.”   


“Is he going to be okay?” Claude seemed awfully calm about it..

“He’s not kicking the bucket yet so he’ll be alright. And don’t worry about my absence. I’ll be back before the end of the month, probably even before our next mission begins.”   


“Take care then, Claude. Try not to cause too much trouble.” Ashe jokes, his tone playful.

“No promises.” Claude flashes him a smile and winks, letting the hand on his shoulder linger before pulling away.   


Judith doesn’t say anything at the exchange though if Ashe didn’t know any better it looked as if something just dawned on her. Ah, it was probably none of his business.

Claude strolls out of the room and Judith turns to him as he starts cleaning up the mess of books and papers on his table. Her face softens at him for unknown reasons before she turns back to Claude, most likely keeping tabs on him.   


Outside the room Ashe barely catches Judith’s voice and nearly drops his papers at what he hears.

“So, the freckled boy huh?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone else really just love Judith? She's like one of the very few people that can throw Claude off his game I love it 
> 
> AND I love you guys holy heck thank you all so much for 300+ kudos!! I'm so glad people are getting on this ship like, yes they may not have in-game supports but they work well in an oddly cute way, ya know? 
> 
> Ahhhh, thank you all so much for comments, kudos & for reading! <33


	13. Knights & Dorte

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Claude gone, Ashe catches up with a former classmate and finds out who Dorte is.

With Claude gone it felt as if the month moved by as slow as possible. Two weeks had already gone by which shouldn’t be much of a big deal, yet Ashe finds himself missing his house leader.   


The monastery was certainly more enjoyable with him there and once again Ashe finds himself at a loss.   


Judith’s words never left him alone either, unsure how he was supposed to even take them.   


_ “So, the freckled boy huh?”   
_

What does that even mean? Was it an insult? An observation? Ashe wishes he actually eavesdropped, but how ridiculous would he look sneaking around trying to follow them out of the monastery?   


Claude didn’t even respond back either, maybe until they were a safe distance away, he presumes. Maybe Judith actually  _ was  _ surprised that while they had their differences, their friendship came with ease.   


Why should he care about what Judith thinks of him anyway?

.. Well she was someone who must have known Claude for a long time to be so informal with a noble. Though even if she didn’t like him he's sure Claude wouldn’t stop being his friend over one opinion.   


Unless she meant it in another way..? Nah. That was forbidden territory that Ashe wasn’t going to even  _ think  _ about going near. It does make him wonder though..   


Mainly if Claude held hands with anyone else or threw personal space out the window. Now that he thinks about it he’s never actually seen Claude that close with anyone other than himself. Claude was just overly friendly towards him was all.

It’s what he makes himself believe anyway. So he does the next best thing which happened to be turning towards comfort food. That’s a thing people did when they were stuck with internal turmoil, isn’t it?   


He knows for a fact the cookies he recently made are guaranteed to make things sweeter.   


…

He’s glad he didn’t say that aloud.   


It was early enough in the afternoon that not many were there, yet his eyes landed on blonde hair sitting alone at a table. It was odd, the feeling of being both sad yet happy to see her. He’s been so busy with his house he barely made any time for his former friends.

“Ingrid?” Ashe approaches with caution, hands full of the plate of fresh cookies. Either by his presence, the food or both her eyes light up briefly widening in surprise.   


“Ashe! It's been some time since we spoke, hasn’t it? Take a seat we can catch up.”

Ashe doesn’t hesitate on the invitation and seats himself across for Ingrid. “Oh um,” While he was going to offer her some baked goods it appeared she was preoccupied with the few plates in front of her. Ashe shrugs biting into a cookie, not minding the faint sounds of their chewing.   


It was certainly different from how his evenings were spent with his classmates.   


“So,” Ingrid slides a plate away, neatly folding her hands in her lap giving him her full attention. “How’s the Golden Deer?”   


“It’s interesting and quite fun. My classmates are very unique. And I’m learning a lot from our professor! He’s very skilled in combat and surprisingly a good teacher despite being a mercenary all his life. Claude even taught me some incredible combat arts! In our last battle he dodged an enemy attack by flipping then countered with his own arrow without missing a beat! O-oh um, sorry for rambling.”   


“There’s no need to apologize. I wanted to catch up, remember? I’m actually relieved to hear. I was worried when you left the Blue Lions, but you fit right in with them. You’re always so happy every evening with them here, even Dimitri is happy for you. You’ve grown in a way. It’s nice seeing your eyes light up just by speaking about them. You really care for them, don’t you?”   


Such a sweet, caring smile she has. It makes his heart swell from the support of his former classmate. Even  _ Dimitri  _ held no ill will towards him, which was very relieving to hear.   


“I do.” Ashe closes his eyes. And he’d protect them no matter what. He can’t even think about any harm coming towards them without feeling anger or fear. “Thank you, Ingrid.”

Ingrid hums softly in response and when Ashe opens his eyes he feels uneasy at the stern look he receives. They were off to a good start, did he say something wrong?   


“Uh, Ingrid?”   


“Have you been eating enough? You’re so skinny. You haven’t been skipping meals again to spend more time in the library have you?” Oh, she knew about that? It’s hard to leave when you find a good book to read.   


“You sound like Raphael in a way,” Ashe chuckles, nibbling on a cookie. “He says I need to eat more so I can get muscles like him.”   


“Well he’s right. If you want to be a knight you have to have a hearty appetite too.”   


“I feel like you two would get along so well. Speaking of classmates, how has the Blue Lions been?”   


“Oh, you know. Same old, same old. Just the other week I saw Sylvain try to approach Flayn right when Seteth was rounding the corner..”

The two continued to chat until the dining hall filled up, sharing stories and laughter of their experiences so far, until they returned to their respective tables, continuing to chatter with their classmates until it was time to part once more for the day.

*******

The week slowly proceeded forward and Ashe found himself wanting the month to end already. This particular day went even more slow with the dreaded chore of stable duty.   


Last time he was on stable duty it was with Claude and well, they did good enough. This time with Marianne she seemed more into it than both of them combined.

“I have to say Marianne you sure have the hang of this. I could be at this for months and still have the horse glaring daggers at me.” Ashe says, wiping the sweat off his forehead. Said horse gives a huff and turns its head to Marianne. Maybe the horse wasn’t fond of males?   


“Um, you’re a little rough with the brush is all..” Not meeting his eyes, Marianne shifts awkwardly and continues petting the horse as Ashe brushes in a slower, lighter motion.   


“There, there..” The horse nuzzles its face against Marianne’s hand who gives him one of those rare small smiles. She sure had a knack for animals. He was a cat person himself.

“Say Marianne I’ve been meaning to ask you, who’s Dorte? You mentioned him a while back and I was wanting to meet him.”

“Oh um, you already have.” Well that was certainly puzzling. He never knew anyone with that name.   


“I have?”   


“This is Dorte,” Marianne says, patting the horse’s head. Ashe has to do a double take at that wondering if Marianne was serious-

Which okay yes she  _ is  _ considering she never really jokes around. Maybe he could figure out why Dorte didn’t like him or maybe that was a long stretch.

“Uh, thank you for the well wishes, Dorte.” Cautiously Ashe pats the horse’s head who shakes his head after the pat. Once his hand is quickly back by his side Ashe decides that’s enough contact for one day.

“Is he alright?” 

“Dorte is happy, but sore. He wouldn’t mind a treat tomorrow. Maybe a carrot..” It’s surprising how relaxed Marianne could be around animals. She really let her guard down and was more open to them than people. It was sweet in its own way.

“Maybe I could bring you an apple tomorrow too.” At that the horse neighs and Marianne giggles. 

“He’s  _ very  _ happy about that.” 

“Finally enjoying stable duty, freckles? That makes one of us.” Ashe gasps at the very familiar tone and quickly turns towards Claude who was already making his way to the trio. Maybe it was because he’s in a good mood, but he got the sudden urge to go hug Claude. That impulse of course was quickly shoved down, but he’s sure his excitement was evident.

Especially since he couldn’t stop smiling.

“Welcome back, Claude!” He was beaming, wasn’t he? Of course he was their house leader was finally back. 

“Man, I missed this place. I forgot how long and boring those meetings could be.” Claude rolls his eyes and shakes his head. “How’s Dorte doing?”

Ashe nearly reeled back, flabbergasted. “You  _ know  _ Dorte?” 

Claude grins, leaning against the stable. “Of course I do. Dorte here is quite the complainer. I’d say he’s head to head with Lorenz in that department. He only ever settles down if he gets a treat or two.” 

While Ashe wasn’t too keen about stable duty the arm slung comfortably around his shoulders and the air being filled with Claude’s upbeat voice and Marianne’s quiet soothing tone made it seem less like a chore.    
  
It was good to have him back.    


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is probably a little messy, but ahh that's how fillers be sometimes. And more Marianne is always a good thing, yes? As for Ashe the gay confusion chronicles continue 
> 
> Thank you all for the comments, kudos & for reading!!


	14. Dawn in the Dusk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers for in-game chapter 5 and spoilers for what the next in-game chapter will be about.

Their next mission started out like any other usual one, simply getting rid of a group of thieves in a tower who happened to also have stolen a hero’s relic. You would think that would be easy enough to do, which it kind of was for awhile until the leader of the thieves turned into a huge demonic beast.   


To put it simply it was absolutely terrifying. Just from touching the lance of ruin he became completely distorted. Apparently the bandit wasn’t worthy of holding the weapon nor possessed a crest.   


Ashe himself doesn’t even have a crest and seeing the “divine punishment” firsthand makes him not want to be anywhere near the heroes relics. Ever. Professor Byleth was the exception and now he knows what may happen if he ever tried to hold such a weapon.   


So after a few days of being terrified and trying to fall back into his usual steps Seteth’s sister, Flayn went missing. It was one thing after another and Ashe is starting to realize maybe the monastery isn’t as peaceful as he thought it was.

Ashe had heard a rumor that the same thing happened last year, some saying it was the work of evil spirits. He one hundred percent hopes that is  _ not  _ the case. It was bad enough he had to be paranoid about the library at night.

While everyone was trying to figure out where Flayn had gone Claude made a very good suggestion to their professor.

_ “Hey teach, why don’t we all stick in pairs? Just as a precaution of course.”   
_

His classmates were quick to get aboard on that idea. Even Lorenz didn’t have any complaints towards Claude’s suggestion. It  _ was  _ comforting to have a friend by his side that way if they did run into the culprit it’d be one on two.

“You don’t think she was spirited away do you?” Ashe shudders from his place in the library getting a worried glance from Lysithea. It happened to be their day to pair up which was nice considering they both enjoyed their precious reading time.   


They probably shouldn’t have spent all evening in it though. Really an unfortunate accident. Time flies when you’ve got a good book after all. He did get a few lectures from Lysithea how he should study instead, but he’d take chivalrous stories any day.   


Oh well, everyone had their own preferred genres.   


“Why would you bring that up? I-I’m sure she’s fine, end of topic.”

“I don’t know, I think that’s an interesting theory to explore.”   


The both of them jump in their seats, eyes widened and pulses quickened at the new arrival. Ashe is starting to suspect Claude just purposely loves to drop in unannounced on him. And well probably everyone else too. He knows Ignatz shared a few stories about it anyway.

“Claude!” Lysithea slams her book shut, standing up in the process. Ashe is certainly glad she didn’t cling onto him before otherwise he’d probably be on the floor again. Oof. “What are you doing here alone? You’re supposed to be with Leonie, do you know how reckless it is to leave her alone at night!?”   


And so the lecture began. Though he can’t entirely blame her, he wouldn’t want to be left alone either at the current hour.

“Slow down there, she’s fine. I already walked her to her room. And I had a hunch a couple of bookworms would be in the library since teach put you two together today. And to no one’s surprise I found you.”

“You were checking up on us? That’s very kind-“

“Wasn’t it  _ your  _ idea to stick together with someone? We’re not kids, we can make it back to our dorms just fine.” Lysithea interrupts, her arms crossed and looking annoyed just by the presence of Claude. She made a few good points, but Claude meant well.   


“I’m not so sure about that one. Remember the last time we were all here? You need me so I can get rid of those  _ spooky  _ ghosts lurking around.” Claude speaks with his tone full of mirth, shoulders shaking with laughter. Oh no.   


It left Ashe red faced and embarrassed to be called out on his fear of ghosts, but Lysithea? She was  _ fuming _ .

No, no, no.

“Alright pal you asked for it!”   


Claude shields his face, but Ashe is quick to interfere, nearly jumping over the table to get in between his two feuding classmates. Maybe just the one since Claude was still grinning which didn’t really help his case. At all.

If he had to play peacekeeper then so be it.

“Hey! Let’s just calm down and um,  _ not  _ throw around any spells in the library.”

Claude lowers his arms, eyes still gleaming with mischief. “You suggesting we take it outside then?”

“Fine with me.”   


“Wait no! No, that’s not what I meant.” Ashe frowns, keeping them at an arm's distance. “Why don’t we all go back to our rooms so we’ll be fully rested for tomorrow. Our professor must have new information for us.”   


“I did see teach flocking around the monastery today. And I am curious to what juicy details he dug up for us.”   


“As much as I dislike agreeing to Claude right now I also want to learn any new information as possible.”   


Thank the Goddess his plan worked. Claude wasn’t the only one who had a few tactics up his sleeve, at least this way it diverts their attention to another topic at hand. It was also a win-win considering they were all heading back to their rooms, without fighting mind you, and for some well needed rest.   


Lysithea spared them few words and to Ashe’s surprise she didn’t slam her door shut. Probably out of common courtesy as to not wake anyone up or she actually did simmer down. Either way no one got hurt so Ashe cleared his objective for the night.   


“Thank you, Claude. It was unnecessary that you went out of your way to find us, but it was also welcomed.” Ashe places his hand on his necklace giving a slight bow to Claude. Once again Claude brought a great deal of comfort to him, but maybe he shouldn’t need to rely on him too much. Lysithea was right, they weren’t kids. Er, technically not adults yet, but still they were pretty mature.

Claude raises a brow. “It was only a hunch. I figured you two would have those noses buried in a book. Plus it was past Lysithea’s bedtime. She needs her rest if she wants to get big and strong.”

“Why do you tease her so much? I wasn’t sure if she was actually going to throw a spell at you or not.” Knowing how powerful Lysithea was he wouldn’t go around playing with fire like that. Claude certainly wasn’t scared of poking the bear so to speak.   


“Like I said before, you have to make your own fun around here.” Claude stretches and looks at him expectantly. “You should get some shut eye too, unless you were expecting a goodnight kiss?”

Claude’s laughter rings in Ashe’s now burning ears who already turns to shield his face towards his door. At least he could make a strategic retreat now. “G-good night, Claude.”   


“Night, freckles. And maybe next time.”   


Ashe cranes his neck at an awkward angle, puzzled as to what ‘next time’ meant, but the wink he got referred back to the kissing joke. Oh goddess was he actually serious about that?

He’s never actually kissed anyone before-   


Ugh, now is not the time for that.

Which is what he proceeds to tell himself before and after getting ready for bed. It still lingers in his mind despite it  _ definitely  _ being a joke. Claude was just trying to rile him up like Lysithea, that was all.

But did Claude joke like that with others? It certainly sounded like flirting to him. If he wanted to tease him he could constantly knock on his fear of ghosts like he did with Lysithea. He knows Claude’s never teased Marianne nor Raphael. It was probably hard to do so with Leonie, and Hilda went back and forth with him. So did that mean him, Ignatz, Lysithea and Lorenz were easy to rattle?   


Claude wasn’t that cruel, his jokes were never mean spirited. Back to his previous thought he’s never really heard Claude say anything flirtatious with the others nor do anything inside their personal spaces.

It hits Ashe that it makes him feel genuinely  _ special  _ to get that kind of attention even if it was or wasn’t intentional. Claude could be doing it subconsciously, but Ashe would always be aware.

Hand holding, fingers brushing, a hand lingering on his shoulder..

Ash never minded them either. He always let Claude in and never pushed away. Not to mention his heart would always do a small flip around him.

And now he.. Now he was aware that somewhere down the line he really did develop a crush on Claude.

That night Ashe barely slept a wink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so it begins. Sorry for once again skipping in-game chapters I'm going to be doing that a good bit for certain chapters since honestly it's easier to just play/watch the chapters instead of trying to describe them. And partly because I'm lazy and want to focus more on these two fhdjf 
> 
> Thanks for commenting, kudos & for reading! <33


	15. Confidant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes you just need another perspective on your troubles.

If Ashe thought their last mission went from easy to terrifying he had another thing coming. He’s not sure if a beast is more horrific to see or someone who literally calls themselves the Death Knight. Either one brought a trail of death behind them, but yeah he’d rather not face either. No one would, though they had a mission to do and Flayn to save so he couldn’t really complain all that much.

Claude had to help Hanneman carry Manuela to the infirmary and ended up missing out on the battle. In a way Ashe is slightly relieved he wasn’t present since he didn’t think he’d be able to focus after his realization.   


_ ‘I need to get it together..’   
_

It really sucked honestly. He couldn’t even behave right around Claude anymore without somehow ending up tongue tied. The only comforting thought about having a crush on their house leader was that he most likely wasn’t the only one.

He’s not afraid to admit(to himself), that Claude is fairly attractive. He’s sure others had their own reasons for liking him so well. His looks, his charm and personality.. Claude was the whole package and this was absolutely, one hundred percent normal. It was okay to have a crush. Not like he was going to act on it anyway.

It however was not okay to wonder if Claude had a crush. It shouldn't matter to him and it should not make his heart sink either. That was Claude’s business and not his.   


Though he can’t help but fear this little crush as well. It was suffocating keeping it to himself and if word got out he could possibly ruin his friendship with Claude or make it awkward.

Why did everything have to be so complicated now? Why couldn’t he just repress his emotions instead? Easier said than done, especially around Claude.

It didn’t help matters that Ashe constantly replayed every time Claude would get near him, touch him and speak to him. Was this normal? Probably not, he wouldn’t really know considering he never had a crush before. A lot of his classmates were attractive and cute, but none of them ever made his heart do small flips.

It scared him when Hilda would point out how often he’d space out. Like she was  _ on to him _ even though he was being paranoid. She probably didn’t even known; didn’t have a clue. If anyone would figure it out first it’d most likely be Claude. And that? That scared him the most.

There were a number of people he could go to about this problem, but it really narrowed out when it came to trust and who would or may have experience in that area.

Lorenz didn’t have much luck in that area. Well he’d be insulted too if he was getting hit on just because he had a crest or was from a noble family. Leonie didn’t appear to care for it as far as he knew, Marianne hardly talked to anyone outside their small group, Lysithea was probably too young or didn't care for it either..

Raphael never really mentioned anyone recently other than his sister and Hilda once remarked that anyone who wanted her heart would have to get past her brother first, yikes. With their new additions of Cyril and Flayn to class he didn’t think either could relate to it. Cyril was pretty blunt and Seteth would probably kill him if he knew his little sister was talking to a boy about crushes. Talk about the wrong idea.

And then.. Then there was Ignatz. The shy, lovable artist. Other than Claude, Ashe got along fairly well with Marianne and Ignatz. Perhaps because they were the most quiet of the Golden Deer.   


Ignatz was trustworthy and didn’t really gravitate towards gossip either. It’s another reason why Ashe had asked to spend an evening with him after dinner; sitting on the very bench he first saw Ignatz paint near. He idly wonders if that painting ever got finished and what Ignatz had done with it. His room was probably filled with painting supplies.

“It must be something really important if you only want to speak with me,” Ignatz’s smile is weak, as if he was debating if that were a good or bad thing. “You’ve been spacing out a lot lately. What’s on your mind?”

“Um, well..” Ashe fumbles with his hands, not really sure if he should lay them on his lap or fold them together. There was a nice breeze out but his hands were already getting sweaty.

“Have you ever had a.. A crush on anyone?”   


_ That  _ certainly gets the painter’s attention. He’s never seen someone whirl their head towards him so fast, even looking at him like he grew a second head. Maybe he should have beat around the bush a little before asking something so personal.

“U-Uh I mean..” This time it’s Ignatz who’s fumbling with his hands and words. Ashe can’t blame him. He’d be in his shoes too if the question was directed towards him.

“Haven’t we all? Most of us anyway.” A beat goes by before he speaks up. “I don’t think crushes matter if nothing grows from it. I don’t think I could ever act on mine. I don’t have the confidence to do so,” Oh so he  _ is  _ in the same boat then. “But you can’t control how you feel and if it blooms into something more.. That’s when it’s no longer a crush.”

Ashe is silent letting Ignatz’s words sink in. From what he got out of it he should just ignore the crush until it goes away; let it fade. And if it doesn’t..   


“You’re in love with someone?” Ashe lowers his voice, eyes staring in awe at the now flustered painter. That was actually really adorable. He’s been so caught up in his own affairs he didn’t even realize so much was going around him. Next thing you know he’s gonna end up finding out Marianne’s in love too.

“Shh! Yes, but I don’t want that getting out. When the time is right, maybe I’ll tell them. Or learn to live with it. Love is unbearably a hard emotion to grasp.”

“I can imagine,” Ashe chuckles. “Your secret is safe with me. Thank you for lending an ear, I wouldn’t mind chatting again under the sunset with you.”   


“Careful how you phrase that someone might get the wrong idea.” Ignatz laughs along with him finally at ease after their heart to heart. It’s odd, if Claude had said that Ashe would be burning from the ears by such a simple line. Yet with Ignatz he can laugh freely without his heart hammering in his chest.   


Days like these, where they could be carefree.. How lovely they were.

“Oh and Ignatz? I’m rooting for you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi hello have I mentioned how much I love Ignatz because I do jdfh I made it kind of vague to who he likes/loves because I'm over here shipping him with two other people and I'm not sure if I should make any side ships official yet in the fic 
> 
> A nice little chapter is coming next, since you know who has a birthday in Wyvern Moon <3 
> 
> Thank you once again for kudos, comments & for reading! <33


	16. Freckled Birthday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minor spoilers to references of Ashe & Byleth's C-Support is all.

While the month was filled with a roller coaster of emotions and preparations for the Battle of Eagle and Lion it was also the month of his birthday. Which, of course Ashe was genuinely excited for it. Maybe it was childish to be that way, but it was a day for him. He didn’t really expect much, but was pleasantly surprised by the book Ignatz gifted him and the flowers Marianne gave him.

What really shocked him was the personal invite to have tea with their professor. In all actuality it made him jittery being one on one with Byleth. They weren’t exactly talkative, but at the same time they were more of a listener.   


_ ‘Nothing wrong with that.’   
_

Ashe shrugs to himself taking another sip from his cup. The gesture was kind enough and they didn’t need to be engrossed in a conversation for the day to be pleasant. “Angelica tea leaves are my favorite, how did you know professor?”   


Byleth, the ever stoned faced mercenary cracks a smile at that. “Claude told me.”   


Ah, he should have known. He’s not sure if Byleth went asking for the information or if Claude tipped him off, but it was still thoughtful.   


“Claude  _ is  _ an endless fountain of information.” Ashe chuckles, idly nibbling on one of the cookies their professor brought with him. Tea, sweets and books; the way to his heart honestly.   


“I’d say. I’m glad he suggested you join the Golden Deer.”   


Ashe nearly spits out his tea, but opts to awkwardly swallow it.   


_ What.   
_

Wasn’t it Byleth’s idea in the first place? Why would Claude want him as a classmate when they knew next to nothing about each other? Surely Byleth was joking- okay well he doesn’t ever really joke, but this must be some mistake.

“Why would he suggest someone like me?” Ashe can’t help the nervous laughter nor the twist in his gut about this newfound information. What was he supposed to do with it? Go up to Claude and hug him over it? Interrogate him? He is grateful to be with the Golden Deer, but his mind was slowly processing everything once more.   


“He said he had a hunch about you.” How vague, how very frustratingly  _ vague.  _ For a brief moment Ashe felt like he understood why Lorenz would often get frustrated at Claude. The conflicting thought soon went away and was replaced with guilt. He shouldn’t feel an ill will towards Claude when he doesn’t even know where he’d be now without him. It was merely the answer he got that threw him through such a loop.

“You think he’ll ever tell us what that hunch is?”

Byleth smiles as if he knew something Ashe didn’t, he takes a moment to answer as he sips his tea, eyes closing as he answers. “Only time will tell.”

*******

Ashe stumbles through his birthday after his afternoon tea with their professor. He can’t get it out of his head that  _ Claude  _ was the one to hand pick him out of everyone in the monastery. Why would a talented archer want  _ another  _ archer in his class? You’d think he’d go after Felix or Ingrid, heck  _ anyone  _ that wasn’t him.   


What was so special about him? Did Claude just point to him and think he’d make a good teammate for their class? He fit right in now, but back then Claude knew nothing about him.

.. As far as he knew. He had nothing to hide, wasn’t up to any misintent, if anything he was pretty normal. Wouldn’t Claude find that- find him boring?

“Ashe!”

Every question Ashe has for Claude wilts away the moment he turns to him. How could you be frustrated or even mad at a charming smile like that?

.. Maybe that was just the crush part of his mind talking. Though it  _ was  _ hard to stay mad at Claude.

“You seem pretty energetic, is everything alright?” The frustration melts away despite the small curious voice in his head wondering why Claude took a liking to him. Maybe Byleth was right. Maybe time  _ would  _ tell.

It’s the waiting part that kills him. But it’d be worth it than to possibly put a dent in their friendship.

“Just happy I caught up to you,” Claude grins and it’s now that Ashe notices his hands have been behind his back the whole time. A smile tugs on his lips. Another surprise? “Now, you know how talented I can be. But with wrapping? Not so much. I would have gotten Hilda to help me out but it was devastating that she’s nowhere to be found. Probably hiding out, I heard Cyril scolded her about that pesky lazy problem of hers.”   


“Was I rambling?” Claude pauses, as if he were actually expecting Ashe to answer that. In an odd sort of way Ashe could listen to him all day. “Probably, but here.”

With a small ‘ta-da’ Claude reveals a blue book behind his back that Ashe quickly recognizes. On the cover it read, “Loog and the Maiden of Wind” his all time favorite book. He couldn’t believe it! That book was nearly impossible to find!

“Where in the world did you find this? This is full of tales of chivalry throughout Faerghus! It’s what got me into reading!” It’s so unbelievable that he’d have the book in his hands once more. Lonato used to read from it before he even knew how to pronounce half the words in the book. So many fond memories in one book.

“I had to do some hard bargaining, but it was no big deal. I knew I’d get what I want the moment I laid eyes on it.” The way it was phrased made Ashe gawk at his house leader. To anyone else it’d sound like a bratty royal getting what he wanted, but Claude.. Claude wasn’t like that.

From what he’s heard Claude didn’t have the most normal childhood(seriously who tied their kid from a horse?), but even if he still had luxuries he wasn’t spoiled to the core. Claude tended to use schemes to get what he wanted after all.

He just wonders why Claude would ever want him.

“You still with me, freckles?” A hand waves in front of his face that makes Ashe nearly stumble back. Ah, he really shouldn’t space out like that, especially in front of others. On the upside he’s managed not to get tongue tied around Claude today. That’s a small enough victory for him.

“S-sorry. You must be better at bargaining than I am,” Ashe chuckles, waving away his previous thoughts. He’s sure he’d be pondering on it later anyway. “I love it, Claude. Thank you.”

And then Ashe does something he wanted to do, what he’s been  _ meaning _ to do for so long. Which shouldn’t be much of a deal, yet it was.   


Like a rush of affection Ashe wraps his arms around Claude and finally hugs him. It surprises him that Claude doesn’t waste any time hugging him back despite a book being awkwardly pushed against his back.   


It was the fact that Claude went out of his way to find Ashe’s favorite book, that Goddess almost  _ no one  _ knew about it except their professor. Maybe Claude even bought it from the thief that snatched it up before Ashe could lay his fingers on it.

A book that held so much value, that meant the world to him.

“Happy birthday, Ashe.”   


Just like how Claude meant to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took them 16 chapters to finally hug don't look at me 
> 
> HHH THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH FOR 400+ KUDOS <333 I'm glad you guys like/love these cuties too, they're so nice together. <3 
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading, comments & kudos I really appreciate it!! <3


	17. Battle of the Eagle and Lion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No spoilers for this chapter.

The Battle of the Eagle and Lion was in full swing. It’d go as you’d expect it to, not that Ashe was being cocky, but with their professor they  _ do  _ have the advantage. With the absence of the other two professors they certainly had the upper hand when it came to numbers as well.

They’ve come such a long way. Lorenz no longer fumbled with his lance, Leonie’s skill with a sword was certainly showing considering she was able to keep up with Felix.   


Claude was busy talking up the other house leaders, trying to throw them off(did he hear Edelgard scream just now?), and Hilda was right beside him blocking out the princess’s axe. She was surprisingly getting into it.

Though it seemed like Raphael was having the most fun. He almost feels bad for the other houses having to attempt to evade his fists. Or maybe he should feel bad for those caught up in Lysithea’s magic. Goddess knows he wouldn’t want to be in that minefield.

As for him and Ignatz they acted as Flayn and Marianne’s guards. Healers were essential when it came to each battle and with their lack of them they had to ensure they’d be okay.   


He’s noticed that like him, Ignatz no longer has that hesitation when it comes to releasing his bow string. How long had it been since their first battle? All Ashe can remember is his heart pounding in fear and in anticipation.   


Those days were behind him now, behind all of them. It makes him wonder if Lonato would be proud of how much he’s grown.   


From the corner of his eye Ashe can see Lorenz going lance to lance with Ingrid. It seemed like they were having a chat as well- and why did she look so angry all of the sudden?   


“I think he struck out again,” Ignatz says with humor in his voice. “That’s a new approach. Wouldn’t think he’d try courting someone on the battlefield.”   


“I think he got it from Sylvain.” Ashe shakes his head.   


From the side they watched Byleth and Cyril come rushing over from a defeated Dimitri to back Lorenz up.   


“..Who was it this time?” Marianne pipes up quietly. It probably didn’t even interest her, but Ashe had to give her credit for wanting to be included in the conversation.

Ashe takes a moment to send a few arrows towards Hubert’s way who was getting a little too close to their house leader. At least he was more concerned fretting over Edelgard to give them the time of day.   


It sent a shiver down his spin at the icy glare he got from the dark magic user. Yikes.

“Dorothea. You can imagine how that went.” Ashe chuckles, and aims his bow with Ignatz towards the few remaining Black Eagles’s members on the field. Marianne was preoccupied with healing Leonie’s wounds and he was more than eager to wrap up the battle.

“He never learns, does he? My brother gave him quite the earful before.” Flayn giggles and goes to join Marianne with healing up the rest of their class.

Claude and Hilda pretty much had the rest of the fight covered and he has a hunch that they’ll be hearing about Hilda’s overtime during their dinner later. Claude mentioned her having potential so he can see why he’d want to put it to go use.

“The Golden Deer takes the win once again!” At Claude’s words Ashe lowers his bow and gives Ignatz a small high five. He had a feeling they’d be the last ones standing, but it felt even better hearing it aloud than thinking it.   


As Ashe reunites with his classmates he can’t help but feel he didn’t contribute as much as everyone else. He’s not sure if the feeling is mutual with Ignatz, but it almost feels like Claude purposely put him in the background.   


Not to say he didn’t get a few hits in. They were playing the roles as knights, that’s what Claude even told them.   


There was a possibility that Claude didn’t want him, Ignatz, Marianne and Flayn in the crossfires. And that? That was conflicting while still somehow being sweet.   


For now Ashe decides maybe that’s not such a bad thing.

*******

So dinner turned out to be a full out feast. Apparently it’s a tradition where Claude comes from so who is he to complain about that? After all they did earn it. It was okay to celebrate a job well done.

“Um, are you sure this okay?” Ignatz voices his concern and is met with a plate full of meat being shoved his way.

“Are you complain about food? Our victory is the perfect excuse to go all out!” Claude says matter-of-factly.   


“You don’t need an excuse to eat! But you really need to eat more to get your muscles like mine. You too Ashe!” Now Raphael is shoving a plate of meat Ashe’s way. Guess this time he did get caught in the crossfire.

“I happened to snag some fancy cheese for this very occasion too.” Didn’t Claude do that before? Ashe idly wonders where he kept getting said cheese.

“Did you steal that from lady Rhea?” Cyril frowns, pointing his fork accusingly at Claude who shrugs not so innocently. If anything that spoke volumes.

“I wouldn’t put it past him.” Lorenz rolls his eyes.

“Who cares? We deserved this. Lighten up.” Leonie elbows Lorenz who scoffs, but doesn’t respond back.

“You should snag some sweets next time.” Lysithea chimes in, looking a little too happy about that idea. Not that Ashe can blame her.

“I second that.” Ashe mumbles, chewing on a piece of meat and gets a look of pure satisfaction from Lysithea. Nice to know they had so much in common.

“Here Marianne, you’ve  _ got  _ to try this.” At the sound of Hilda’s voice, Ashe turns his head to the left watching Marianne turn a lovely shade of pink. The scene feels fairly familiar with how she hesitates to take the piece of cake off of Hilda’s fork who looks at her with such a rare fondness.   


“Oh..! It is very delicious.” Hilda grins and Marianne giggles at something that gets whispered in her ear. Have they always been so close?

“You wanna be fed too?”   


Ashe fumbles with his fork, trying to ignore Claude’s cheeky grin. That had been  _ months  _ ago. And with his newly discovered crush his poor heart wouldn’t be able to take that.

“N-no, nope I’m fine, thank you.” His words are rushed and he wastes no time stuffing his face with the plate of meat Raphael slid over.   


Maybe it’s illogical to eat until you got sick(it is), but right now that was the best plan he could think of to avoid stuttering and stumbling over his own words. Perhaps Ignatz was skilled with the knowledge of how to stuff down your emotions around your crush.   


Goddess knew he certainly needed pointers.

“That’s the spirit! C’mon Ignatz, Ashe is in the lead!”   


And with that a food eating competition between most of their class snowballed from there. Those who didn’t participate had their own reasons, Ashe just wished he had one too.

Lorenz was disgusted by the, and to quote, “boarish behavior”, Lysithea thought it was childish despite digging into her plate of sweets, Hilda thought it wasn’t lady like for her, Marianne didn’t hardly eat much in general and Cyril said it was a waste to fill up more than necessary.   


But despite that Claude was still cheering him on, getting in on the fun and nearly starting a food fight with Lorenz. It was getting pretty rowdy to the point that Seteth had scolded them(but thanks to Flayn he showed  _ some  _ mercy) and they were sent back to their rooms.   


Claude had to practically drag him back to his room as he groaned in protest at the oncoming stomach ache.   


“I have no idea how Raphael does it.” Ashe groans again, leaning his weight on Claude. There was no way his muscles would ever get that big thanks to his weak stomach. He should just join Lysithea’s bandwagon and chow down on cake instead.

“Raph has the muscles of ten men anyway. Which conveniently covers everyone in class.” Ashe attempts to laugh along with Claude, but it comes out as a groggy moan instead. Yep he was definitely done with the day.

“Easy there, freckles. We’re here now.” Ashe barely registers the door opening just thankful to finally be in the safety and comfort of his room. Falling to the bed with little to no grace Ashe knows he’ll regret it tomorrow and think about it non stop but it’s one of those things you don’t really care about in the heat of the moment.

“Thank you, Claude.” Ashe says faintly, his eyes closed. He’d have to repay the favor tomorrow or whenever a new crop of tea leaves came in.

“Don’t sweat it. I’m pretty sure Ignatz got the worst of it, poor guy. Cyril is probably talking his ear off about it. Fortunately for you your generous house leader isn’t going to scold you.”

“You encouraged it, did you not?”   


Ashe chuckles at the gasp he hears. If he peeked his eyes open he knows Claude most likely has a hand over his heart at the ‘accusations.’ Unlike him Claude knew when to fold 'em.

“I’m glad you had a good time, uh, for the most part anyway.” Ashe holds his breath feeling fingers slide through his hair, gently messing with his already unruly hair. It’s such an odd, unexpected show of affection that leaves him speechless.

“Good night, Ashe.”   


Ashe scrunches his eyes at the small ruffle he gets and once the door clicks shut it takes what feels like forever just to calm his rapidly beating heart.

What was that about?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ashe's current status: gay confusion 
> 
> Man I cannot write fight scenes for shit, I apologize for that again 
> 
> On another note we're less than 5 chapters away from a chapter I'm very eager to write because there's a certain event in a certain month ahhhh <3 
> 
> Thank you all for kudos, commenting & for reading!


	18. Minor Realizations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And one has to wonder how long you can stay oblivious.

Another month, another strange mission. There was something nerving about the newest one. All he knew was that there was an infectious disease spreading in Remire Village that wasn’t anything exactly normal.

It was unsettling to say the least. But there wasn’t anything he, or anyone else in their class could do until the time of their mission would come. Hoping the villagers would be fine was wishful thinking and as much as Ashe loved to lend a hand he knew next to nothing about medicine.

_ “Oh, don’t you worry your pretty head about it. We’ll get down to the root of the problem. With teach on our side we don’t have to fret.” _

Claude had brushed his worries away(mostly) just like that without Ashe having to even utter a single word. Reassurance and confidence of their house leader is all he needed. Claude was right though, their professor was incredible when it came to almost anything.   


Especially battles. Ashe knows he saved him more than once.   


The month felt awfully slow. There wasn’t any major events, other than a short fishing competition but that was about it. Even their professor didn’t have much to teach them and opted to take them out for a few minor battles before their big mission.

Well, there  _ was  _ one other special event before their mission which happened to be Marianne’s birthday. Ashe has to give himself a pat on the back for planting flower seeds and tea leaves to make lavender blend.

He thought about growing lilies of the valley, but someone beat him to it. It was probably someone from his class getting prepared as well, he just kinda forgot to ask who it was. Ah, perhaps Marianne would talk about what she got for her birthday.

“Knew I’d find you here.”   


Of course Marianne would be at the stables. It was a coin toss between that and the chapel. She always looked so frightened or down in the chapel which mildly concerned him, but she never said anything. Always praying and then leaving.   


At least now she appears happy judging by the smile and the way she actively talks to her favorite horse.

“Oh..! Hello Ashe, Dorte and I were just talking. His back is feeling sore again, poor thing..” The horse lets out a huff as to agree and nudges its muzzle against her hand. For a horse it seemed like he had it rough.

Ashe gently pats the horse who no longer was aggressive at him. At least they were making progress. “Sorry to hear, Dorte. And Marianne happy birthday.” Marianne looked surprised as if she wasn’t expecting him to remember(why wouldn’t he?) and he was gifted with a cute smile and her eyes scrunching up in delight at the bag of tea leaves he held out to her.   


“So you can make a lavender blend I thought..” Ashe begins to trail off but his eyes start to get fixated on the new accessory Marianne wears around her neck. It looked almost identical to his own, but it was more sparkly and instead of a violet hers had a lily of the valley in the small bottle. “What a beautiful necklace.”

“T-thank you and um, thank you again. Hilda gave it to me today. It’s a very lovely gesture even though she didn’t need to go through so much trouble..”

“What are you talking about? It looks great on you and you deserve it. Hilda has the right idea when it comes to giving you the finer things in life.” Ashe’s voice softens and he watches Marianne’s face flicker with emotions. Dorte must have noticed too since he pushed his muzzle against her and licked her face.

“A-ah! Dorte, you sneaky little guy.” Marianne giggles, which is highly infectious since Ashe joins along with her. Maybe Dorte sensed a few unpleasant thoughts were going through her and wanted to cheer her up. He really misjudged that horse.

“He’s just horsing around.” Puns were something you always had to test the waters with and fortunately Marianne found humor in his instead of groaning or staring at him.

For a slow month he’s at least glad Marianne is able to enjoy her birthday.

*******

It’s a few days after Ashe encountered Marianne that he starts to notice a few things about her. Like his eyes have been suddenly opened. He notices at dinner time how Hilda is always seated next to her, including her in nearly every conversation she has, except the ones where she’s going back and forth with Claude. The gentle whispers and delicate physical contact.   


How Hilda tends to be glued by her side when she’s not having anyone run errands for her or when Marianne is spending time at the chapel alone or at the stable. He figures there’s only so many places Hilda will go where she doesn’t want to get roped into work.   


He shouldn’t compare, he really shouldn’t, but it’s like how Claude and him are. Claude always sits next to him during dinner time, tends to leave him be if he’s studying, scheming or currently fascinated with whatever the church is hiding. Gentle touches and the tendency Claude has for finding him.

It makes Ashe so curious as to what they are. It’s none of his business, but his curiosity has been piqued. So it’s hard to dance around the subject when Ashe really wants to ask the opinion of someone else.

Which happened to be Ignatz.

“Hilda and Marianne are pretty close, huh?” Goddess he was awkward at this.

“It’d be strange if they weren’t,” There’s a halt in his sketching that means Ashe caught his curiosity. Well, maybe. Not with the weird look Ignatz was giving him how. “What brought this on?”

“O-oh um. Well, I’ve been seeing them together more recently?” What a lame response, but it also held truth to it. Maybe he shouldn’t have brought it up.

“Oh, you just noticed that? Hilda’s been courting her for awhile now.”

That certainly answered every question he had. Curiosity satisfied, but wow did he feel dumbfounded.

“Seriously?” How far out of the loop  _ was  _ he?

“I’m surprised you didn’t notice sooner, then again you’ve got your own thing going on.” Ignatz chuckles and pushes his papers to the side. “They’re very smitten with each other. I think it’s sweet, don’t you?”

“Of course it is. I’m happy for them, I just feel.. Well I don’t really know how to feel for being so oblivious to it.”  _ What else was he being oblivious to? _ “Is there anyone else I should be up to speed about? l might as well ask while we’re on the subject.”

“I don’t think so. I heard Lysithea gushing about how strong Leonie is. I’ve never seen Leonie so embarrassed before.”

Okay to be fair even he wouldn’t have got that one unless he had seen it like Ignatz did. Though that could be interrupted as admiration since he’s not really sure if either were interested in anyone.   


“You’re pretty calm about all of this. How come you’re not always fretting over your crush?” If anything Ignatz seemed normal compared to him. Sure, he didn’t know what was going on in his head or if he was an internal disaster like he is, but still how could anyone be so relaxed?

“Probably because my crush isn’t always flirting with me.”

Ashe felt like the wind was completely knocked out of him.  _ Please  _ tell him he wasn’t being painfully and obviously flustered around Claude for anyone to notice. Ignatz was a painter of course  _ he’d  _ be great when it came to observations.   


And no, that was not an excuse to make him feel like it wasn’t obvious. Because it wasn’t.

.. Was it?

Ashe decides to hide his embarrassment in his hands, groaning loudly and receiving a sympathetic pat on the back. He only prays that Claude doesn’t notice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tmw you think you're being lowkey about your crush but your friend calls you out on it 
> 
> Ahh I love the cotton candy duo, their so sweet together. Also, still unsure on who to pair Ignatz with. I'm torn between Raphael and Cyril. Cyril because there's a really cute fic out there of Ignatz/Cyril if you guys haven't seen it maybe check it out, it's what got me into the ship! 
> 
> two updates in a row my motivation is maxed on writing because there's going to be a /really/ cute chapter coming up, ahhh I'm excited about it 
> 
> Thank you all for comments, kudos & for reading! <3


	19. Remire Village

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Major spoilers for in-game chapter 8.

What was thought to be a mysterious quest turned out to be a full-on nightmare. Their objective was to save any villagers not infected, but the gruesome part was having to  _ kill  _ those who were tainted.

It was disgusting, morbid, and infuriating to know that so many innocent villagers were merely  _ test subjects _ . Why would they want to change them in such a horrific way? It was nerve wrecking hearing the corrupted villagers laughing like maniacs and expressing murderous intent.  


What’s worse? It was all Tomas’s doing. Disgusting didn’t even describe his horrid deeds. Amongst all the laughter and fire the freaking  _ Death Knight  _ showed up too, and while everyone was concerned about that new appearance Lysithea took care of him faster than he came in. Thank the Goddess for magic users.

Jeralt and their professor took the front lines while the rest of the class escorted the villagers out of harm's way. It was heartbreaking to know those caught in the evil schemes of Tomas would have to fall by their hands. Marianne was right. This  _ was  _ an act of mercy at this point.

Various arrows shot, Ashe just wanted the day to be done with more than anything. He’s sure his classmates were ready to head back as well. Who could blame them? If Ashe thought he was traumatized before, boy was he wrong now.

With Byleth in sight and Jeralt by his side, it was obvious that they overpowered Tomas. Ashe sighs in relief, maneuvering his way around the broken village to ensure everyone had made it out safely.  


And that was probably the worst idea he had to split up from the group.  


Everything was going fine, until he swore he heard someone banging and clawing at a crumbled down house that looked and  _ should  _ be abandoned. Cautiously, Ashe crouches down near the source of the noise, unsure if his mind was playing tricks on him or not.

That was not the case.

Before he can even speak, to ask if the person was okay, a hand lunged forward from under the burnt wood causing Ashe to yelp and topple over, barely scrambling away from the clawing hand. He fumbled with his bow,  _ Goddess this was not the time to panic,  _ and before he could reach back an arrow came flying past him and did a critical hit to the enemy; the hand immediately falling down.

Ashe’s hands shook and he never felt as relieved to see Claude rushing to his aid.  


“Damn, that was a close call.. Are you okay? You’re not hurt, are you?”  


Ashe doesn’t answer, barely processing what Claude had said due to the fact that he was nearly an inch away from getting dragged under or possibly infected-  


“--he?”  


That was nothing to be fearful about. It was okay. He  _ was  _ okay. Even if he got caught he could have shot them and got away. That was nothing, it  _ should  _ be nothing.  _ So why couldn’t he stop shaking? _

“Hey, look at me.” Claude’s voice was soft, yet firm. Both his hands rested on either side of Ashe’s face; light green eyes finally blinking the terror out of them to see concerned dark green eyes staring back at him.

“You’re safe, I’m here and we’ve evacuated everyone.” Claude’s voice never wavered. It makes Ashe wonder how he can remain calm after all of  _ that.  _ He truly was a great leader.  


Ashe’s breathing soon returned to normal and he was no longer trembling which is when Claude had moved his hands away from his face. A hint of disappointment was left in him, though it didn’t last long with Claude pulling him into an embrace.

“Don’t scare me like that, got it?” There’s small, breathless laughter that comes from him, yet there wasn’t a drop of humor in it. He can only imagine how Claude felt; looking over to see his classmate and then seeing them suddenly fall to the ground and shrieking in fear.  


Ashe gently wraps his arms around Claude who only tightens his hold on him.

“I’m sorry.”  _ Sorry for going by myself, for worrying you, for nearly getting myself hurt by my careless actions. _

“Claude! Ashe!” Hilda calls out distantly and that’s when they both break apart despite both obviously being reluctant about it.  


Neither talk about what happened nor mention it to anyone. Their class walks back to the monastery with the air being grim. Usually the way back is filled with their upbeat chatter but a lot weighed on their minds today.

Hilda walked close to Marianne, her arm wrapped tightly around her while Marianne prayed silently. Lysithea, Flayn and Lorenz stuck close to either side of Raphael while Leonie was between Byleth and Jeralt. Ignatz treaded beside an angry Cyril; due most likely by the betrayal Tomas had done to Rhea and everyone else at the monastery.

No one questions why their house leader held Ashe’s hand all the way back and if they noticed they didn’t utter a word.  


*******

The evening is pretty somber after that. During their time in dining hall barely any of them are up for their usual banter but Claude puts in the effort to make some small talk. The only real noise is the distant chatter of the other two houses who were spared of such a gruesome task.

Ashe decides to call it a day after that, along with most of his classmates retreating to their respective rooms. Tomorrow was a new, and very welcomed day. And a new month, one of which they were eager to embrace as to forget what was witnessed.

Thinking back on it Ashe would prefer the slow days over today. He hopes to never see anything like that again. But it’s unsettling knowing Tomas got away. Next time would they be lucky enough to end his reign of terror?

Ashe sighs. What a long night it’d be.

Soft knocking on his door nearly startles Ashe who reaches for his bow out of fear, but mostly instinct. Who would be visiting him at this time of night?

“You still up, freckles?”  


Oh. Well now he just felt silly for wanting to aim an arrow at the door. Oh Goddess he could have nearly hit Claude if he did so.  


Scrambling off the bed Ashe quickly answered the door and was relieved to find that Claude hadn’t left yet. In fact he looked almost relieved to see him. Ashe brushes it off knowing the day they had that it’s just a normal reaction.

“Brought you something,” Claude smiles with ease, pushing a bag of assorted candies into his hands and makes his way into his room. Usually it would be rude to invite yourself in, but their comfortable enough with this routine. Actually, Ashe hasn’t even seen Claude’s room for that matter. Not like he’s thought about it. Er, up until this point that is. “I know that sweet tooth of yours is itching to try them so dig in.”

“You didn’t-“

“You barely ate during dinner time and missed out on dessert.” Ashe knows for a fact that the dining hall does  _ not  _ serve bags of candy. It was something you’d have to make yourself or go into the market for.

“Is it me or do keep adding books to your room?” Ashe turns a bit pink at the sudden observation and the teasing tone. Claude was like a whirlwind tonight apparently. Coming into his room with candy, commenting on his very unique decor and making himself at home on his bed- who was now patting the seat beside him.

“Maybe I should invest in a bookshelf next.” Ashe says sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck before joining Claude. He pops a candy in his mouth, offering the bag to Claude who joins him on their late night snacking.

“Wouldn’t hurt.” Claude says with a mouthful of candy that makes Ashe chuckle for the first time today. “You holding up okay? You don’t have to pretend to be unaffected.”

Ah, of course he’d be here out of concern. Considering what happened he doesn’t blame Claude even though he shouldn’t worry about his sake.  


“It was pretty traumatizing, but I’m fine. I mean, I still can’t get everything out of my head and I’d rather forget about today, but that’s something that happens with time, right?”  _ Like a lot of things.  _ He already has firsthand experience about mending a scarred mind.

“I get that. Things were more than terrible today. No one likes to see innocent people die. Things were really grim, a lot of questions are frustratingly unanswered once again and we’re another step back.” Claude sighs. “But if we don’t keep marching on how are we supposed to make any progress?”

He.. He had a good point. That was one way to put it, much like Ashe’s perspective. He  _ really  _ wants to move on from today.

“It’s a little late to be having this sort of talk, isn’t it?” Claude says after a beat of silence. Ashe expects Claude was going to get up after that and bid him a good night due to the hour.

But expect the unexpected with him.

Instead, Claude stretches and pulls down a startled Ashe with him. They both topple down on their sides and Ashe has to use every fiber of his being to calm his beating heart when Claude wraps his arms around his chest as if this was a normal act between friends. Ashe is left lying with his back against Claude’s chest; unsure what to do with his arms and opts to awkwardly clasps his hands around the bag of candy as to not accidentally touch Claude.  


While he was a disaster on the inside of what to do or say it was.. comforting being so close to Claude that he could feel such a nice warmth radiating from him.  _ What was wrong with him? _

“This is more comfy, don’t you think?”  


“I- um-”   
  
Claude laughs when Ashe is unable to make a coherent response. How was that even possible? It was as if he forgot every word in the alphabet. What a mess he was reduced to.   
  
Once Claude realizes there was no way in the world Ashe was going to be able to speak he pipes down and lets the silence take over for once. They don’t really move other than Claude’s arms shifting every now and then as if this was a usual act of causality for him. He’s at least thankful that Claude can’t see how flushed his face is. If anything Claude wasn’t going to let him go anytime soon.   
  
..Is this how Claude normally seeked out comfort?   
  
Ashe’s heart fortunately calms down and as he listens to Claude’s soft breathing against his ear he can feel himself being lulled to sleep. For being so hyper aware he’s surprised that he can be able to find any rest in the current position he was in.   


It was a time where Ashe assumed he’d be up throughout the night but now he rests peacefully in the safety of Claude’s arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ashe: guess we just gotta embrace time  
Claude: or each other.. haha just kidding... unless..? 
> 
> Morbid(ish?) chapter aside I've got two fluffy chapters coming up very soon!(i've been updating so much maybe i should slow my roll?) 
> 
> Thank you all for comments, kudos & reading!! <3


	20. Preparations

The following month happened to be the last month of the year and Ashe was more than eager to see what awaited them all in the upcoming year. Things could only get better or worse, right?   


But the current buzz wasn’t that. The Garreg Mach ball was coming up and was the main topic of the month. For someone who grew up knowing how a noble lived he never really mastered the art of dancing.   


Lonato never taught him so he assumed it was unimportant until now. Maybe he could use his former thief skills and stealth to avoid having to dance much. Or with anyone. It’s not like everyone was expected to dance anyway.

“This is terrible,” Ignatz slumps at the table, his plate barely being touched. “Why did our professor pick me to represent our class? Can’t anyone else take my place?”   


“Hey don’t look at me. I’d rather not have that sword fall on me either.” Leonie says with disinterest. The feeling was pretty mutual it seems.   


“It is pretty crowded too..” Marianne sighs, fiddling with her fork.   


Lysithea nods. “There’s nothing to learn either, other than seeing who steps over their feet the most.”   


A sudden pair of hands slamming down on the table startles the whole table. “What’s with you guys? This is a  _ ball!  _ We get to dress up in fancy clothes if we want to, dance and twirl around the floor throughout the night.. How  _ romantic! _ ” Hilda squeals in delight earning a few curious gazes from other tables. “How can you guys not be excited about this? You agree with me, don’t you Claude?”   


Hilda’s sweet tone does little to nothing for Claude who sits there unaffected. It is to be expected when it came to the two of them. “Oh I’m afraid not. Balls aren’t really my thing either. I just don’t find them appealing like you do.”

“Oh, you must be kidding.” Hilda rolls her eyes and turns to Ashe, who was unfortunately caught between them. “You agree with me, right Ashe?”

So unlike Claude he’s very weak. How do you even shoot down someone’s excitement? He doesn’t have the heart to tell her, nor does he want to admit that he can’t dance. It didn’t help him one bit that all of his classmates were staring at him.   


“I'm not  _ as  _ excited as you are, but I will say it’s refreshing to have a cheerful event after,” Ashe hand gestures. “You know.”   


_ ‘Way to lighten the mood..’   
_

“I agree. The ball is an excellent chance to show off my skills! Not many can master dancing so elegantly.” Lorenz practically radiates from his own praise. At least the awkward crisis was averted.

“Who needs to dance fancy when you can let loose! I’m excited for it too!” Raphael beams easing over the now forgotten tension. Ashe hides his smile behind his hand trying very hard not to think about Raphael excitingly twirling around another student.   


Leonie may have had the same thought since she laughs gently not even a second after Ashe fails his non-laughing task.

“I wish you were dancing instead of me, Raphael.” Oh, it seemed Ignatz was still stuck on that. Who could blame him he would be too.

“Oh, come on now. Let’s get you out of that pit of despair. It’s not all  _ that  _ bad. You just gotta dance the way into their hearts.” Claude can’t even keep a straight face at the end of his supposed advice and begins laughing at Ignatz’s low whine.   


“I’ll give you pointers.”   


“Don’t look at your feet, that’s a rookie mistake.”   


“Um, you’ll probably do well.. I’ll pray to the Goddess for you..”

“Even if you mess up we won’t think any less of you.”   


“It’ll still be embarrassing, but even you can’t mess up something as simple as dancing.”

Ashe watches his classmates go back and forth while Ignatz was busy groaning against the table with his glasses skewed.

_ ‘May the Goddess show him mercy.’   
_

*******

It’s a surprise to the class how determined their professor is to win the dancing tournament. There was still assignments and weapon practice, but nothing else new. They haven’t seen their professor this excited since the big fishing tournament. Maybe he was just pretty competitive. Who didn’t like to win?

On the upside there was more free time for him and all the other students. Ashe finds himself roaming the halls of the monastery not quite ready to be engrossed in a book before dinner time(every time that happened Claude was usually the one to drag him out of there).   


Even Hilda didn’t have anything for him to do due to being busy dress shopping with Marianne. It was nice they were able to enjoy themselves, but Ashe is also entirely grateful their class uniforms were allowed at the ball. Dressing up in fancy clothing meant for a noble just felt wrong to him.

“You can’t afford to put in effort into yourself for the ball? I would figure you’d be excited about it considering.. Your circumstances.” Lorenz voice echoes throughout the halls. Oh, maybe he shouldn’t eavesdrop.

Yet it doesn’t stop him from peeking around the corner.

“Are you accusing  _ me  _ of scheming? You wound me.” Claude’s voice dripped with humor from his overdramatized reply. “Aren’t you using the ball as an excuse to bother some poor soul who was unfortunate enough to waltz into you?” Okay, yep this was a personal conversation he shouldn’t be listening in on, he should turn the other way and make a quick escape-   


But he’s so torn about it despite it being  _ wrong  _ but his legs don’t want to budge from his spot against the wall. Goddess he was getting worse than Claude.   


Then again Claude probably didn’t hide behind corners and listen in on people.(As far as he knew?)   
  
Surely not.

“First of all you do not ‘waltz into someone’, if you want to insult me at least have the decency to have your facts in line. Second of all, there are a lot of women who are charmed by a gentlemen who is able to maintain a refined noble title.”

For the first time Ashe hears Claude scoff. That was pretty unusual for him. “Say what you will, but I don’t believe in wooing people over their noble status. What’s the point of courting someone if you’re not in love with them?”

At that confession Ashe is practically glued to the wall and his face was looking off in awe. If anyone passed by it’d definitely be a weird sight but he’s so.. So pleased? Giddy? Relieved? To hear that.   


He shouldn’t because wow why is he getting his hopes up over a  _ harmless crush _ . He’s not about to doodle his and Claude’s names together in a study book or imagine marrying him. Eventually the crush will fade anyway, right?

He wasn’t lovestruck, but he can’t get over how insightful that was. Claude could care less about status and was more interested in the person.  _ Why did that make his heart feel so light? _

Footsteps bring Ashe to his senses and alas, it was panic mode again. This did  _ not  _ look good. How do you explain eavesdropping? You can’t.

_ No, no, no.   
_

Just as Ashe is ready to admit defeat and face the consequences Ignatz rounds the corner. Oh thank the Goddess above, the timing was impeccable. The convenience of Ignatz has Ashe looking at him like he just saved his life which only confused the poor painter.

“But I really think you  _ should  _ check it out. There’s some very fascinating tales in there.” Ashe smiles nervously at his awkward attempt of a book conversation.  _ Work with me here. _

So much for being honest. Maybe he can come clean about this sometime in the future with Claude.. He knows he’ll have to bring Ignatz up to speed later. Why did he always have to suffer instant regret?

He’s not even sure if that’s a good or bad thing.

“I don’t think Ignatz would be interested in knightly tales, freckles.” Ashe jumps at Claude’s voice from right behind him. He knew he was coming but he’s still overly nervous about the crime he committed.

Which was silly, wasn’t it? Claude just eavesdropped on them-   


Then again it wasn’t anything personal. Poor Ignatz still looked puzzled.

“Everyone has different tastes.” Lorenz mumbles and Ashe isn’t even sure if that was directed towards their conversation or not.   


“Anyway where are you two headed? I’m itching to go do something fun.”   


“Or scandalous.”   


Claude merely rolls his eyes at that and ignores the comment.   


“I was on my way to find our professor. I wanted him to see me practice again.” Ignatz looks away shyly and is startled when Claude clasps his hands right down on his shoulders not even a moment after he spoke.   


“What an excellent idea! Let’s get to it, I wanna see your moves too.”   


“W-What?! Claude, no!”   


“More the merrier, right guys?”

Ashe can only nod with the feeling of instant regret settling in. He followed along with the group, but their chatter was mostly white noise to him; his head proccupied with Claude again.(Why was that such a usual thing now?) How do you even bring up the topic of eavesdropping and love to your crush without making it awkward?

Maybe he could bring up the topic after the ball. Or he could learn to live with it, maybe he should just keep it to himself instead. It wouldn’t hurt not telling a single soul, right?    
  
For now he accompanies an eager Claude, a calm Lorenz and a fretting Ignatz.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apparently it's FE Rare Pair week so hey happy rare pair week! Just a little heads up I'll try to get up the next chapter this weekend since I don't wanna rush it and I've got a few fics for this week I wanna write too
> 
> Tomorrow/Thursday I'm gonna be uploading another one shot fic for Claude/Ashe(in Claude's pov too) so look forward to that hhhh 
> 
> Thank you all so much for shipping this with me, leaving kudos, comments & for reading! <33


	21. Night of the Ball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Slight minor spoilers for a few of Claude's Goddess Tower quotes.

The following week after the White Heron Cup the ball was going to be in full swing. Their professor and Ignatz’s hard work really paid off to have won the dancing competition and both were in higher spirits which is exactly what Ashe liked to see. Who would want to see their friends down anyway?

Ashe thought he’d spend the rest of the week thinking of ways to avoid dancing and while he had a few good excuses they all went out the window when Claude had approached him the night after their white heron win.   


_ “Why don’t we go to the ball together? I know we both aren’t as eager as Hilda, but it’s a festival so why don’t we let loose and celebrate? I wanted to ask before anyone even thought about snatching you up.” _

While Ashe was completely tongue tied he somehow managed to agree. Then proceeded to spend the rest of his day trying to put out the fire on his face and still his rapidly beating heart.   


That went as swimmingly as Alois’s puns.   


And what was that about someone ‘snatching him up’? There wasn’t exactly a line for him.

There’s something about Claude, how he tends to leave people lingering on his words and has such a mysterious vibe to him. Not as mysterious as their professor, but there was always something about him that tended to intrigue anyone around him.

.. Or maybe that's just how Ashe felt. Probably didn’t help with the fact that he spent all week thinking about how he’d have to dance with Claude. He didn’t have the heart to ask their professor or Ignatz to give him lessons. Maybe he’d look like a fool, but he’s sure he’s not the only one.

And it wasn’t like he was out to impress Claude either, or anyone for that matter. This was merely a monastery tradition that everyone was partaking in. Nothing more or less.   


Ashe was actually relieved when the night of the ball was nearly upon them. Each day closer to the event made his stomach twist in knots and made him grow more anxious until the time had come. At least he could get it over with and then call it a night. It was a normal plan and honestly the only one he had.   


.. But part of him was also looking forward to it. Claude was right. They  _ should  _ be able to let loose and have some fun. There was going to be food too so maybe he could sneak in some sweets.   


And if he could spend time with someone he truly cared for.. Then what was the harm?

The night before they had all met up, forming a promise that would further strengthen the bonds they shared.

_ “This may sound impetuous. Perhaps irresponsible. Almost certainly impossible. But we’re gonna do it anyway. In exactly five years’ time, let’s promise to meet again, right here at the monastery.” _

Five years from now.. Marianne mentioned that marked the monastery’s millennium festival, celebrating one thousand years since the founding of Garreg Mach. What a perfect excuse to see his classmates. Ashe could hardly wait to see what time held for them.

He distantly wondered how he and all the others would turn out and had a peaceful night throwing around said thoughts.

Now when Claude asked him to the dance Ashe assumed they’d meet up at the room, hang out and just chat. Instead Claude met him at his room and soon enough Ashe found himself hand in hand with Claude. These tiny little shows of affection  _ really  _ aren’t helping his crush problem. Was it really a problem anymore? Nearly every day he was an internal mess anyway.

Claude’s hand never left his either; not when they got looks, not when there were whispers or giggles, but only when Dimitri and Edelgard had called out to him.   


“Guess the dance hasn’t started yet. I’ll just be a second, but try to save the first dance for me.” Claude winks and strolls over to the other two house leaders. Ashe feels flushed knowing the fact that his former leader saw him hand in hand with Claude, but when he’s brave enough to glance over Dimitri looks almost.. Happy for him?   


Ashe sports a soft smile of his own and turns to walk away from the oncoming crowd. Goddess knows he doesn’t want to get caught up in the mess when everyone on the floor was desperately seeking out a partner.

Lysithea stood out to him, being one of the few girls huddled around the food area. To Ashe’s delight he spotted various sweets on the table. Why did sweets always make any night ten times better?   


“Hello Lysithea, enjoying yourself?” Ashe has to bite back a chuckle at how ecstatic the young mage looked. In fact he’s never seen her in such high spirits until now. It was nice seeing her act her age for once.

“Even though I don’t care for events like these, at least the food is always outstanding.” Ashe could definitely agree to that. Yet he makes no move to join Lysithea in her sweets scouting. There’s a small fear in the back of his head that if he ate he’d eventually get sick thanks to his nerves and well, the fact that everyone would be going in circles tonight.

“I haven’t been to many fancy events, but I have to agree with you on that.”   


Ashe lets his eyes wander around the room seeing familiar faces all around, some dressed up and some looking the same as ever; like him. Hilda was busy eagerly talking to Marianne who both looked beautiful in their new dresses with Raphael and Lorenz looking as if they were seeking out partners.

“He’s sure popular tonight.” Leonie says, nodding to the group surrounding Ignatz. Dancing with the white heron cup winner was certainly an honor, no wonder there were people flocking around him. It was well deserved.

“It’s no surprise he’s among one of the most popular to dance with. I’m sure Claude and the other house leaders will be fairly busy tonight as well.” Honestly he expects he’ll only get a few minutes to dance with Claude before he’s passed around all night. It’s touching that he still asked him to the ball  _ and  _ to be his first dance. One of those rare times that Ashe felt genuinely special.

Though that’s how Claude almost always made him feel. There was just something missing that he couldn’t pinpoint..

“For someone not crazy about fancy events Claude sure was excited about coming with you.” Leonie speaks it as if it were the most natural and normal thing in the world. Like it wasn’t a big deal when it was making Ashe all fuzzy.   


“Oh, looks like it’s starting now. I’m gonna stay on the side lines, good luck out there.” Leonie pats him on the shoulder as she slips away from the crowd currently scrambling around to find a partner. Ashe stands to the side looking around for Claude but to no avail. Disappointment starts to sink in at the negative voice in the back of his head even though he wished he could brush the feeling away.   


Claude was a house leader with a strong reputation so why wouldn’t he be out there already? There’s probably a line just to dance with him too.. He’d be lucky just to even talk to Claude again-

There’s a tap on the shoulder and as Ashe goes to turn he finds himself getting spun around, face to face with Claude and that natural charming smile. It barely processes that he’s being escorted into the middle of the room with his hand being held by Claude.

Ashe stumbles along like a fawn just learning how to walk. He really meant it when he said he had no idea how to dance. With Claude’s hand holding his up and the other resting against the middle of his back it’s no wonder Ashe couldn’t meet Claude’s always curious, gleaming eyes. As for Ashe his eyes were focused on his feet for the most part until he looked up upon hearing Claude’s laughter.   


“Keep your eyes up and let me take the lead.” Claude winks, and Ashe mumbles out an apology.   


It went.. Better than Ashe had hoped it would. Not that his heart calmed down, but it was actually quite fun; Claude swaying with him to the slow music and twirling him around the dance floor. Claude’s always seeing eyes never did leave his either; whether that was a good or bad thing didn’t matter. Nor did it matter when Ashe found himself giggling when Claude spun them around three times in a row.   


It made Ashe feel dizzy in two different ways.

As per tradition you have to switch partners and part of Ashe wished that moment could have lasted a little longer. For someone who wasn’t excited about dancing he didn’t mind one bit with Claude. There was no worrying, no fretting; the exact thing he did now with the few dance partners he got traded to.   


By the third girl he was ready to escape the dance floor and fortunately for him Lorenz took the poor girl off him. How many times did he have to apologize tonight? Their feet would probably be sore thanks to his rookie dancing skills..

Ashe decides to sneak a few cookies in his hoodie before making his leave, though he stops to watch those still dancing. Most of his classmates and even their professor seemed to be enjoying themselves, which honestly is all he could ask for.   


“Hey Ashe,” Leonie catches him just in the nick of time. “Claude wanted me to pass on a message. He said for you to meet him at the Goddess Tower, he’s got something to discuss with you. Must be pretty important.”   


Ashe doesn’t know what the nudge is supposed to signify, but he does as he’s told. With each step up the stairs he could hear his heart beat in his ears.   


What could he possibly want to talk about?   


*****   
**

“Sorry to keep you waiting, Ashe. Man, what a madhouse in there. I thought I’d never get to leave. Ah, what a burden it is to be great at everything.. I really can’t stand a noisy crowd.”

He’s surprised Claude got there faster than he thought. Ashe ends up not having to wait as long as he thought he would which is good because it also means he can save that third cookie for later. A win-win night so far he supposes.

“Really? You looked like you were enjoying yourself.” He knew Claude greatly enjoyed feasts, so wouldn’t he be into the festivities of tonight?

“You’re getting better at reading me. When it comes to parties and those dances the nobles do.. They aren’t for me. I was never really taught to do that sort of thing. My upbringing was.. lacking in certain ways.”

“Weren’t you tied to a horse one time?” Ashe adds with a quirked eyebrow. By now he’s figured Claude’s parents weren’t like the nobles he read in his fairy tales.   


“Heh, you still remembered that, huh? I may have secured a fancy new title, but who I am on the inside.. Well, status alone can’t change that.” This makes Ashe smile. Claude didn’t let nobility, status, title,  _ anything  _ stop him from just being himself. That’s what was so great about him. A leader all the same, but still the same guy underneath it all.

“I admire that about you.” Ashe mumbles softly, but it wasn’t faint enough to avoid Claude hearing the small praise. “Er, h-hey, Leonie said you had something important to tell me?” Ashe cringes inwardly. What a nice save.. Very smooth of him. Though he  _ is  _ curious about what the topic could possibly be as nervous as it makes him.

“How could I forget? Anyway, you remember back when you met such a ‘charming’ lady named Judith? I asked you something before I got rudely dragged all the way back home. You look pretty lost so I’ll do you a favor and refresh your memory. We were talking about our homelands, and I asked you if you’d like to see the Leicester Alliance with yours truly. After graduation.. would you like to?”

Ashe’s eyes widen, his face flushes and he remains frozen in place. Ashe barely recalled that conversation and goddess Claude was sincerely asking him to come home with him. The whole ordeal was making him feel lightheaded. There was no good reason for Claude to personally invite him into the Leicester Alliance. His company wasn’t  _ that  _ thrilling. Wouldn’t he prefer somebody else?   


“If you’re hesitant about it I would also officially give you the title as my personal knight. I know it sounds just like an invite to friend to see some place he hasn’t.. But it’s not. I actually  _ do  _ want you to come back with me.” Claude takes a step forward; expression being the softest Ashe has ever seen. His eyes were so filled with hope and his confidence never wavered. He.. He wasn’t joking, was he? There was no trace of mischief or insincerity..   


“You want  _ me  _ to be your knight?” Ashe stares in complete awe-struck, a warmth rushing through him. What was with Claude and making him feel so lightheaded tonight? This wasn’t a dream, was it? No it- it was  _ very  _ much real.

An emotion Ashe can’t quite place briefly flashes across Claude’s face. “Something like that. So what do you say? You? Me? We could be great together.”

His dream of becoming a knight.. It wasn’t as far away as he thought. Claude must see  _ some  _ potential in him to even suggest such an offer. Honestly though, even without the offer of becoming his knight he’d still want to go with Claude. Maybe if he could bring his siblings too.. He’s not sure he’s ready to return Faerghus and to an empty house that was once a home to him.

“I’d love that.” Ashe’s voice is so full of emotion, his eyes glossy and a smile so bright on his face. He was so overjoyed and overwhelmed he wasn’t sure how to contain himself. To become a knight and swear himself to protect someone so- so  _ dear  _ to him. It made him so excited and yet  _ that  _ feeling was showing itself again..

“I’d ask if you want to seal the deal with a dance, but before that why don’t we make a wish? It’s not everyday we get this opportunity. I’m sure you know the legend.” Ashe knew far too well about that tradition. Every year two people could come to the Goddess Tower and upon making the same wish it’d come true.   


“I’m not really sure what to wish for.. Other than my younger siblings to be happy and healthy. What about you, Claude?” As of tonight Ashe already had his wish come true. To become a knight, to atone for his former life as a thief and make things right.. That’s all he wanted. And now he gets to walk that path with Claude.

“What a non-selfish answer, I should have expected that coming from you. Me? I’d love for my ambitions to come true. I don’t like to wish or pray for stuff to happen. Those type of things you have to take action with in order for your dreams to come true. I don’t want this chance to slip away, but in the end it’s up to us to fulfill those ambitions.” How wonderfully insightful. Ashe isn’t sure what these amibitions are, but Claude clearly feels strongly for them. It was odd to put blind trust in another without feeling fear. With Claude it was okay to wear his heart on sleeve and let him guide him by the hand. Ashe never felt so comfortable trusting anyone else.   


“I’ll support you no matter what, Claude. If I can help your dreams come true, then that’s a good enough reason for me.” And it was. Claude may scheme and have tricks up his sleeve, but he never had any bad intentions.   


Er, maybe minus the poisonous mushrooms. Those were something else entirely, yet not meant to kill anyway.

“That’s what I like to hear! Ok.. Here goes. Oh, divine Goddess! Hear our prayers! We beseech you and your radiance! Please, grant us that which we seek!” There’s a pause before either of them speak and Ashe has to hold back a laugh by his over the top performance. “Huh. I think that should do it. The godess’ll make our dreams come true now, yeah?”   


With their wish said and done Ashe only nods with a smile and begins to walk past Claude. It was time to have one last dance and end the enchanting night.

.. Which is what he thought would happen, only for Ashe to find himself get twisted around and met nearly nose to nose with his house leader.   


“What’s the rush, freckles? I thought we were going to dance.” Claude smiles and the humor coming from him is evident. Oh, goddess he was close. Very, very close.

“I thought we- um,” Ashe fumbles with his words. He has no idea how Claude can be smiling so sweetly and being so patient with him. “Aren’t we going back to the ball?”

“I’m afraid you misunderstood,” There’s barely any room between them at this point and Ashe embarrassingly  _ squeaks  _ from Claude resting his hands on his waist. This was  _ too  _ close. “I meant just the two of us.”

They sway slower than they did during the ball. Ashe has to hold his breath as he attempts to remain calm. Which is a complicated task at hand. To not make things awkward Ashe slowly rests his hands behind Claude’s neck and lets himself be gently twirled around the tower. This type of closeness in their dancing wouldn’t be permitted at the ball, no wonder Claude wanted it to be just the two of them.

“You know,” Claude’s starts, his voice unusually soft. “I really do need you by my side. Be it as my knight or something more.”   


As the excitement of becoming a knight begins to simmer down there’s a click that goes in Ashe’s mind that has him staring at Claude in wonder. That emotion he kept feeling, the one he couldn’t place his finger on. It was as clear as day, yet he only realizes it now under the stars.

Ashe was in love with Claude.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This may be the softest chapter I've wrote so far, I hope you guys enjoyed it 
> 
> ALSO, if you haven't seen please check out these very cute Claude/Ashe fanart! They're so adorable and give me life <3 (Second link is actually a scene from chapter 19 and I'm still shaking over it)   
https://twitter.com/Sharkflavors/status/1179486823489212416?s=20   
https://twitter.com/Sharkflavors/status/1179599845419405312?s=20 
> 
> Thank you all for your comments & kudos they really motivate me!! And thank you for reading! <3


	22. Training

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Major spoilers for in-game chapter 9 referred to.

Among the strange, abnormal activities occurring around the monastery Ashe thought they’d be given a break.    
  
That was highly unlikely.    


Students were acting strange, transforming into beasts and trying to kill one another. It was almost as if it were Remire Village all over again. It was bad enough dealing with innocent villagers and now this? Students all around his age getting experimented on.. How sickening.

To make things worse their professor dealt with a heavy blow when it turned out that Monica was not all who she seemed to be and murdered Jeralt in cold blood. He can only imagine what their professor is going through. After all Ashe had to live through his parents dying twice.

It was an eye opener; a realization that you can’t just blindly trust anyone anymore. There were exceptions of course, being his tight knit circle of classmates, but still. What was he going to do if someone attempted to take away the light in their eyes? He can’t even bear the thought so Ashe made a resolution.

It was a simple one really, but it also needed a lot of effort put into it. It was to get stronger. What kind of knight would he be to let those he cared about get hurt? No, not again. He  _ would  _ succeed no matter what.   


And the first step to that? Asking to train with Raphael. Honestly Ashe never thought he’d be taking up that offer until it hit that maybe he wasn’t the  _ best  _ when it came to combat which also lead to him improving on his sword skills late in the evening. It cut into his library time, but if he could get the least bit stronger..   


Then it’d be well worth it.

However with the cost of working out comes the price to pay and in Ashe’s case? He was truly feeling the burn. Was it normal for every muscle to be sore? Probably not? Definitely not. How did Raphael do this every day? It’s baffling to think that Raphael was once in his shoes in regards to training.    
  
“How’re you supposed to eat with your head on the table, Ashe?” Raphael asks out of genuine curiosity, but Ashe remains to keep his head rested on the table. Why did everything have to hurt? There was also the horror of knowing he’d have to do this  _ again  _ tomorrow morning and the next day..

_ ‘It’s going to pay off.’  _ Maybe if he kept telling himself it’d ease the pain. Eventually it would. Er, probably.

Was he really so out of shape?   


“You that tired, freckles?” Ashe jumps not even noticing Claude had joined their table and takes the effort to sit up, but not enough to stop himself from slumping. Oh well, not like Claude cared when it came to manners anyway.

“You’ve been out of sorts all day, is there anything wrong, Ashe?” At Ignatz’s concerned tone Ashe runs a hand through his hair embarrassed that he was ‘out of sorts’ over harmless training.  _ Mostly  _ harmless that is.

“I started training with Raphael. I had no idea how hard he trains.” It brought a new appreciation to him too.   


“That’s not hard! I barely break a sweat!”   


The whole table stares and Ashe proceeds to rest his head back on the table. He really  _ is  _ out of shape.   


Hilda makes a small noise of disgust. “I don’t get why you’d want to train. It just makes you all sweaty and gross, augh.”

“Only a lazy bone like you would think that, Hilda.”   


“I don’t see you out there training either, Claude.” Lorenz says with disinterest.

“Why Lorenz, I’m insulted! I’ll have you know I get in the perfect amount of training with a bow and axe thank you. My extra time spent isn’t getting shot down by every girl in the monastery. Instead I’m studying like our sweet  _ little  _ Lysithea.” It appeared that Claude was being ruthless today to drag Lysithea into it. Or it was a slow day for him. With Hanneman teaching their class for the meantime he can kinda get how Claude was holding back until now.

The rest of the dinner conversation is white noise to Ashe, though Lysithea’s annoyed tone is heard most throughout the ordeal. It’s only when he feels a soft nudge to the side that Ashe turns his head and looks up.   


“Say ‘ahh’,” Oh no. This scene is much too familiar to him. Now back when Claude had done this was when he first joined the Golden Deer house, which was fine at first(still embarrassing), but overall fine. Now that his crush has turned into something more well it was.. Awkward? Heart stopping?   


Anything that made his face flare up went into the category really. Has Claude always looked at him in such an affectionate way or was that just his imagination?

Straightening himself up(what irony), Ashe hesitates before quickly chomping down on the fork and looks down trying to avoid any possible gazes he received.   


“Aww, how cute!” Hilda gushes, furthering his flustered state. “Can you feed me too, Marianne?”

It’s nice to know he wasn’t the only one embarrassed in the group.

*******

After that nearly heart stopping meal Ashe spent the rest of the evening helping Lysithea and Marianne cook up a meal for Leonie and their professor. Claude had done the same for him after a good amount of space had passed and he wanted to do the same, along with the rest of the class of course. Even if it’d become routine it was at least good to check up on them and see how they were holding up.   


So another day had passed and Ashe was back to another new routine of his by doing push-ups with Raphael out in the courtyard. By the time he finally somehow, by the grace of the goddess reached fifty he was sprawled on the ground gasping for air. He could handle running, in fact he was  _ great  _ when it came to speed, but muscle work? Not exactly his forte.

Why couldn’t working out be a fast forward thing? But every knight had their own tale he supposes.. This one was just going slow for him.

“Wow you did ten more than yesterday, great job Ashe!” Raphael beams who somehow wasn’t even sweating. “You’ll get muscles in no time! Let your big bro go get you some water!”   


Ashe musters up the rest of his strength to sit up and watch Raphael rush off with a soft smile on his face. Did Raphael really see him like a younger sibling? He recalls hearing the nickname be told to Lysithea, but she unfortunately took it the wrong way, mistaking it for Raphael treating her like a child.   


It was appreciated with him nonetheless.

With that in mind Ashe falls back down in the grass, eyes closing as he embraces the dampness of the ground.   


“I had to see it to believe.” Claude’s humor filled tone rings in his ears an alarms him how he must look to their house leader. And uh, to anyone else out that early.

Well, so much for relaxing.   


“Claude?” Ashe sits up, rubbing his eyes and yep— that  _ is  _ Claude there in the flesh. “What are you doing up so early?” Claude didn’t actually get up to see him training, did he? That was probably a stretch, then again you never truly know with Claude.

“Don’t sound so shocked, but I can see why you’d be that way,” Claude hums, resting his hands behind his head. “I like to meditate every morning. It’s a pretty peaceful way to start the morning minus dragging yourself out of bed. So, what’s with the sudden interest in training? Raphael’s workout isn’t exactly the easiest thing in the world.”   


_ ‘Believe me if there were a shortcut I’d consider it..’  _ Ashe thinks to himself tiredly. On the upside he got to spend more time with Raphael and gained a little bit of strength every day.   


“Well you see,” Ashe looks down, his expression softening as rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. “Now that I’m going to be your knight I need to fit the part. I’m nowhere near as strong as some of our enemies were and I.. I want to be able to protect you from any dangers that appear.”   


_ “I care for you and you mean a great deal to me.”  _ Is what Ashe wants to say, it’s on the tip of his tongue but he can’t find the courage to do so. It makes his stomach do flips debating if something like that would cross the line or make it obvious to his feelings. Nearly everything he said to Claude made him hyper aware of how much he loved him.   


He only just realized it, but how long has he truly felt this way?

“You’re wanting to change yourself for my sake? Don’t get me wrong, I'm  _ beyond  _ flattered, but I don’t want you fretting over stuff like that. You think I want you rushing into the battlefield and getting yourself killed?” Claude frowns. “You’re already perfect to me. I want you right by my side when we’re in the heat of battle. If you’re not, I'll consider it a personal insult.”   


The hair ruffle that follows has Ashe ducking his head along with Claude plopping down right beside him. It’s hard to make eye contact with Claude, he’s not even brave enough to glance his way. Not when such an overwhelming warmth was bubbling in his chest.   


It makes Ashe  _ want  _ to tell him those three words lingering in his head. Alas, he doesn’t. He can’t. Not.. Not yet.   


“You think Leonie and the professor will be okay?” Is what Ashe mumbles instead. His heart hasn’t fully healed from Lonato, so he can only imagine how much pain they were in during the first few days.

“If you can overcome this I’m sure her and teach will too.” Claude sounds confident enough to put Ashe at ease. Their shoulders bump as they sit comfortably in silence watching the sun begin to rise.

Tired as he is Ashe lets his head rest peacefully against Claude’s shoulder. The only reason he was able to move on was because Claude and the others were there for him.

There was no need for the herbal remedies that set in his room collecting dust.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for this chapter being late, I took a short-ish break after the last chapter since I was constantly uploading last week, but we're back at it again! Next chapter we're gonna get into Ashe's paralogue since I believe it was unlocked around this time 
> 
> Also if y`all wanna chat with me about this ship or w/e I updated my profile on here & added my Discord to it(skree I sound forward don't I fhdjf) 
> 
> Anyway, thank you all for kudos, commenting and for reading again I really appreciate it!! <3


	23. Vengeance & Midnight Raid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers for Falling Short Of Heaven and references to Ashe & Catherine’s B support.

Usually Ashe didn’t care for battles. He wasn’t blood thirsty or exactly thrilled to go out and kill for the sake of the church. He was sort of like Hilda when it came to battles— wasn’t crazy about them and wanted nothing to do with them.

Yet, he still fought. Only to protect the ones he loves. It’s what got him this far anyway. And those who they fought.. It was almost always an act of mercy.

Marianne believed so and Ashe liked to think so too. It keeps one from spiraling downward.

But this time it was different.

Reports came in that the Western Church was going to strike again and their leader was amongst the group. The very same person who sent Lonato out to get slaughtered.

For once he was actually _ eager _ to charge into the battlefield. Finally.. As Lonato’s son he could avenge him.

There were notable differences in their class other than himself. As upset as their professor has been he still carried on as if he was ready to start the battle and get it done with, like any other day. Perhaps the presence of Lady Rhea and Catherine accompanying them put him more at ease. It was hard to say really.

Leonie wasn’t exactly in fighting form either, but upon being asked about her well being she only said, “I have to pull myself together for the sake of everyone.”

He’s sure if this were a different battle— one between her and Jeralt’s killer it’d be different. From what he’s heard they were getting closer to tracking them down and soon enough they’d be pulled into another battle.

Another battle in which the enemy _ definitely _had it coming.

“You alright?” Claude asked softly from beside him. Honestly, he didn’t know how to feel. He wasn’t thrilled, but the anticipation of finding their enemy and avenging his father weighed heavily on his mind. Though there was no need for concern, their mission was to protect Lady Rhea anyway.

He just had other plans is all, yet they were still the same. They were brought out to kill those who committed treason anyway. But their leader.. He was meant for him, and him alone.

“Just got a lot on my mind.” Ashe mustered up a smile for Claude’s sake, who looked over him silently. Maybe Claude already knew how he resented the western church, or how he had a grudge against them for the tragedy that happened months ago.

The wound was no longer fresh, yet it still stung.

“Just be careful out there. If you ever need to fall back, know that it’s okay to.” Claude finishes by shaking Ashe’s shoulder lightly; fingers lingering on him before getting into formation. It was going to be some-what of a tricky mission. Bishops hiding amongst the fog— a cheap tactic that wouldn’t last long.

It stirs Ashe’s heart that the fog had been the same strategy Lonato used.

The sight of lightning coming from Catherine’s thunderbrand signified the battle had already begun. Byleth stayed near Lady Rhea while the rest of them strayed from the group, yet still surrounding the area of their professor and archbishop. There was little to no chance of Rhea getting a scratch on her which meant Ashe was free to go hunt down the leader— the horrid man that got Lonato _ slaughtered. _

Usually Ashe was alone on the battlefield, but there was always one or two classmates in his sight. This time Ashe notes how Claude stays near him, merely around five feet away and making sure no enemy jumps out of the fog. A comforting thought to know that Claude had his back despite their roles being reversed. It appeared Claude _ did _ know of the grudge he held.

If he were in Claude’s shoes he’d do the same.

“Were you Lord Lonato’s page or something?”

Ashe jumps at the voice, swiftly turning to the source of it. The fog was clearing up around the area and the bishop was as clear as day. With the mask on it could be anyone, but perhaps someone who recognized him from before.

With his blood already boiling Ashe gives a curt nod.

“Indeed, he was a devout believer! All we did was provide Lord Lonato salvation from his misery!”

“Salvation?! You used him and threw him away!”

Ashe's hands trembled, not with fear this time, but with pure rage. This man— this senseless disgusting excuse of a human _ killed _ his father. Every time Ashe killed he considered it an act of mercy, but this? This was an act of vengeance. Teeth gritting he lowered his bow with an arrow in place, heart beating loudly in his ears from anticipation.   
  
"Lonato's blood," He seethed out, voice dripping with hatred. He lined up the arrow up so it'd make a clean shot. "Is on _ your hands." _ Storm filled eyes released the bow string and watched as the arrow got a clean strike. The man fell to his knees with an arrow stuck through his head; the magic aimed to harm him no longer there. It's a gruesome scene even with a mask shielding the bishops face, but a wave of comfort would eventually come with the knowing fact that he could no longer use humans as pawns. Just like what Lonato was to the bishop. 

_ Former _bishop.

*******

The mission was successful and as promised Ashe didn’t get in the way of Catherine or Lady Rhea. In fact the church handed over papers regarding his family. It.. It left him feeling numb at what he found out.

For the most part, but the silver lining was that his brother and sister were doing well, and Rhea was going to personally choose a new bishop for the church.

Catherine pulled him aside as the group strayed and informed him about his brother, Christophe. The information learned left a knot in Ashe’s stomach, but at least now he didn’t hold any hatred for Catherine. He tried to avoid speaking to her if he could, but he’s not sure if he ever hated her. There was just a mess of conflicted feelings towards the Seiros Knight.

Ashe decided to skip dinner that evening since he was hardly in the mood after the long day. Who would be after that emotional ride anyway? The moment his back hit the bed he was out like a light; the papers he kept close to him now scattered on his desk.

As much as he read them he wouldn’t care if they burned. Nearly nothing on there was pleasant anyway. But the truth isn’t always going to be pretty.

There wasn’t any pleasant dreams that night and Ashe was actually thankful for the knocking on his door that tore him away from said nightmares.

No longer was there any sign of light outside except for the moon, but that barely lit up his room. Ugh, he probably looked like a mess. Ashe shrugged to himself. No one wakes up perfectly anyway.

“Hey— your hair is more ruffled than usual.” Are the first words he hears upon opening the door. Well, of course Claude would comment about it. Or give him a wordless smile even though Ashe knew he was dying to comment on the mess that is his hair.

“It’s usually ruffled?” He _ tried _to keep it maintained, but to always look like that..

“Well, it’s always fluffy,” Claude waves off the comment. “Before we get even more off track here I’ve come to whisk you away!” If anything Claude looked too happy for someone to be up in the middle of the night. For that to be a good or bad thing was yet decided.

“.. To where exactly?” Ashe plays along, a hint of a smile on his face.

“A little birdie— Uh, well a muscular ‘birdie’ told me there’s always leftovers in the dining hall at night. So the two of us are going to do a night raid.”

While that sounded like a bad idea— mostly the part that may involve them getting caught and eventually in trouble, Ashe couldn’t protest. It was really hard to say no to Claude, and especially hard when his stomach growled.

“I’m guessing that’s a yes, not like I was asking anyway.” Claude laughs, grabbing an embarrassed Ashe out the door and leading him by the hand. It’s not so bad, as long as he can spend some of the night with everyone’s favorite stag.

*******

Raiding the kitchen wasn’t as nearly heart stopping as Ashe thought it’d be. Not even a single person was preoccupying it which left the two of them to come and go as they please.

The only thing that may have gotten a year off his life was when a cat that had the same idea as them appeared out of nowhere.

.. It was hard to look at Claude after having an iron grip on his arm just from an adorable cat meowing at them.

With an armful of food and the cat in Claude’s arms they scurried back to his house leader’s room, and somehow managed to avoid getting caught despite the monastery being in complete silence other than the clicks of their shoes and hushed whispers.

For as long as Ashe has known Claude he’s never actually been in his room before. It was a little more spacious than his own room and didn’t look out of sorts other than piles of books scattered across the room.

“And you said _ I _had too many books.”

“They’re all for studying,” Claude clarifies. “I’m sure Lysithea’s room is worse.”

“Doesn’t she always return her books though?” Ashe chuckles when Claude bumps their shoulders together making a mocking sour face as if Ashe had just insulted his bloodline.

“I don’t mind having a messy room in common with you,” Claude shrugs. “Goddess help us if we ever had to share one.”

Ashe pops a piece of bread in his mouth, taking the opportunity of not having to reply back. He watches the cat they brought along who was nibbling on a piece of pheasant meat Claude tossed to the feline.

Sharing a room with Claude.. If that were ever allowed at the monastery he wouldn’t be against it. They’d probably end up staying up late talking, but that really wasn’t much of a problem.

“Thank you for this, Claude.” Ashe’s shoulders relax. “I wasn’t having the best night until now. The papers I received..”

Ashe hesitates. It was hard to talk about the issue, but with Claude now having his hand over his and squeezing it in reassurance it wasn’t so hard to say what was on his mind.

“They were about my father and Christophe. The Western Church was responsible for Christophe’s execution. Catherine told me he was too naive and idealistic.. And while he wasn’t involved with the tragedy of Duscur he was swayed into assisting in a different plot to assassinate Rhea.” Ashe pauses, inhaling slowly. “They _ used _ Lonato’s grief to attack the central church over what _ they _did. If Lonato knew it was their fault to begin with..”

_ They’d be dead months ago. _

Ashe takes a moment to even out his breathing, relaxing under the tender touch of Claude rubbing his thumb in slow circles over his palm.

“M-my brother and sister are faring well. However when I graduate.. I am to become the new Lord for House Gaspard.” Ashe pauses for a moment, swallowing thickly. “I don’t think I’m ready to go back there— to an empty house. It’s all too much.”

“Then stay with me,” Claude finally says with ease after being so patient with listening him out. Ashe isn’t sure how he can sound so confident and soft at the same time. “You’ve got all the time in the world to go back there. And you are going to be my knight anyway, so it looks like I’ll have to drag you back home with me.”

That gets a chuckle out of Ashe. “You won’t have to drag me if I come along willingly.” Feeling bold and for maybe the first time ever Ashe works up the nerve to _ wink _ at Claude.

.. And before he gets too flustered over doing so he immediately stands up.

“Thank you—“

“Will you stay with me tonight?”

_ Huh?  
_

Once again it was hard to say no considering Claude still didn’t let go of his hand. The question nearly made Ashe’s heart stop and his face heat up in the cool night. There’s no reason for him to stay and he could just easily walk out the door. But it makes Ashe incredibly soft, even after feeling so vulnerable not even minutes ago he can’t tear himself away.

“.. Of course.”

The fact that he didn’t question Claude on the matter spoke volumes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No idea what those papers said in that paralogue or if they were ever discussed/brought up again, but alas. Also sorry I mixed up the first bit of dialogue from Ashe’s encounter with the bishop, just the way he said that one line in the game was so good. You could really hear the hatred coming from Ashe which is pretty rare
> 
> ALSO Rocha drew another cute scene from chapter 21 aka the dance scene and I'm still screamin fhdjfh Check out their art it's very cute!! <3 ( https://twitter.com/Sharkflavors/status/1183422167465086981?s=19 ) 
> 
> HHHH ANOTHER THING THANK ALL OF YOU FOR 500+ KUDOS.. Bless you guys for shipping this rarepair, really glad to see people enjoying this fic/pairing so far!! <33 
> 
> Thank you all so much for leaving comments, kudos & for reading! <3


	24. Delicate Flowers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers for in-game chapter 10.

So Ashe had the idea, the certainty, that last month was the mission that topped all missions.   


That was not the case.

No, not when your professor disappears through some sort of  _ void  _ that nearly gave each one of them a heart attack only to see said professor return with different hair and eye color. Oh, and did he mention that the Goddess’s power now dwelled within their professor?   


How does one actually process that? It took him a whole day to wrap his head around it. Byleth was still the same as ever, just more.. Green. At least their eye colors kind of matched now, so that was something right?

Then there was Monica, who once again turned out to be someone they weren’t. Kronya, was it? Well, her name no longer mattered. Leonie had the same look in her eyes when he encountered the bishop who used Lonato as a pawn. Their deaths were completely different but the scars he, Leonie and Byleth bared were all the same.   


It’s usually hard to read what their professor was thinking, but it was clear he was out for vengeance’s too. Neither one of them got the final say like Ashe did, but even if they did it wouldn’t change anything. While killing the bishop was relieving at first Ashe knew it wouldn’t bring Lonato back.   


Maybe it’d bring him some peace beyond the grave, but..

It didn’t matter now. It was said and done with, just how Kronya was killed by the hand of ‘Tomas’ aka Solon. Who was then proceeded to get slayed by the hand of their professor.

Oh, how he had that coming. How he  _ definitely  _ had that coming.   


But at least it meant things would go back to normal— how they should have been in the first place.   


Minus Byleth changing, but that was only in appearance anyway. He was still the same professor they know and love, nothing was going to change that.   


To add excitement to the month there was even going to be a ceremony down in the holy tomb. Byleth was to gain a divine revelation, was it? Ashe was actually curious about this, except for the fact that they’d basically be walking into an underground grave.   


That’s um, that’s something he liked to push in the back of his head. They were going to witness history, so again that was something, right?   


In the meantime Ashe was preoccupied with watering the flowers.  _ Finally  _ a chore he could get behind. It was the second best next to cooking and above organizing books.   


“Ashe!” The sound of Hilda shouting nearly causes him to drop the watering can. Why did everything make him so jumpy lately? “There’s my favorite guy, can I borrow you for a moment?”   


The way Hilda hid her hands behind her back; smile seemingly innocent and her words sweetened should have alarmed Ashe. Claude warned him several times how that’d be when she’d ‘pounce and make her move’. Ashe didn’t really understand it at the time, only acknowledging it as a tactic used for favors, but Hilda already knew he was more than happy to help, well,  _ anyone  _ out the best he could.   


So it was okay to ignore Claude’s warning this once. Hilda was harmless— off the battlefield that is, so he had no need to keep his guard up.

“Hello Hilda, what can I do for you?” Ashe says, demeanor brightening towards the company. “Did you have a nice birthday?”   


It was only a few days ago, but Ashe gifted her with tea leaves and flower shaped cookies. He wasn’t very original when it comes to gift giving, but a lot of people saw Hilda as a delicate flower— including herself. So it was sort of fitting?

“Oh it was  _ really  _ lovely! The cookies were so cute I almost didn’t want to eat them,” Hilda sighs. “But enough about me, I wanna talk about you!”

“.. Me?” It was confusing to say the least, but not enough to raise his guard.

“Aaaand a certain house leader of ours.”

Oh no.   


He was wrong— very,  _ very  _ wrong to think this conversation would be harmless. This was the last time he’d ever ignore Claude’s advice. Okay, given it was the  _ first  _ time it would now be the last.   


What else was he supposed to do though? Run away from her until she cornered him?   


“C-Claude?” Ashe coughs, desperately trying to ignore his stutter and uses gardening as a way to distract himself. “What about him?”

“Aren’t you going to confess to him anytime soon?”   


This time Ashe does drop the watering can.   


“I mean, I thought it’d happen by now.” Hilda says it as if— as if it were  _ easy  _ and the normal thing to do. No, not with him. Especially when said love of your life is also heir to the Leicester Alliance and there’s a possibility Ashe has little to no chance. Not many would approve of a commoner despite Claude’s view differing from the rest.

Why can’t he just live his life as  _ just  _ Claude’s knight and die with unrequited love? That was so much easier than possibly ruining everything he had with Claude.

“.. What are you talking about?” It’s hard, it really is to face Hilda when he can barely talk with his voice being so shaky. Goddess,  _ she knew.   
_

“Oh please,” Hilda shakes her head. “Being in love is nice, isn’t it?” From his experience so far it really hasn’t. “You get all warm inside thinking about that special someone.. And did I mention how you tend to look at Claude with stars in your eyes? It’s  _ so  _ adorable!”

At this point Ashe feels numb and unresponsive. Did he really do that? Was he  _ that  _ obvious?

“Claude is stubborn too! I had to practically drag details out of him after the ball. Being his first dance, making a wish together..” Hilda sighed dreamily much to Ashe’s internal panic. How much did Claude even share? “I think it’s  _ so  _ cute and romantic how you’re going to be his knight! My brother used to read me a bedtime story similar to that.”

This was an absolute nightmare. He’s sure Ignatz already knew, but Ignatz wasn’t into idle gossip. Goddess help him if Claude knew..

“.. Please don’t tell anyone.” Ashe slumps his shoulders in defeat. At this point there was little to no chance he could play the fool— to be oblivious to what he realized not long ago.   


“Your secret is safe with me,” Hilda winks. “I don’t get how you can sit in silence. Isn’t it eating you up inside?”   


There had been numerous times when Ashe felt the need, as if his heart was urging him to just tell Claude. The words, ‘I love you’ linger in his head, but never his tongue. This was a rational fear, and one that he wasn’t willing to chance.

“I wouldn’t even know where to begin.. I could never confess, especially when it’s one sided.” It comes out more sad than he intended it to. Honestly he’d rather die with an unrequited love than disrupt either of their lives over his trivial matter.   


It still didn’t stop him from painfully imagining what could be. That was out of reach, wasn’t it?   


“Do you have any idea what it’s like to love someone,” Voice nearly a whisper, Ashe inhales shakily. He wished he didn’t sound as broken as he felt. “And to be so fearful of ruining everything?”

He can’t even imagine what he’d be and where he’d be without the Golden Deer now. Claude was the glue that held them together and to possibly ruin what he had with him— to make things awkward, that is something he’d avoid at all costs.

Who would want a knight that’s smitten with their liege?

“Oh sweetie,” Hilda says, voice full of sympathy. It’s enough to make Ashe’s blurry eyes look at her and before he can break down, Hilda was  _ smiling  _ at him. It wasn’t pity, and even then she pulls him into a gentle embrace. It’s the first time he’s hugged someone in months that wasn’t Claude, but it set him at ease and managed to stop anymore tears that threatened to fall.   


“You have no idea, do you?”

Within the greenhouse it may have been public, but it was just the two of them; a bittersweet moment shared between friends. Ashe was still trying to get a grip on Hilda’s words as the clouds that loomed over him were slowly drifting away.

The shadow outside the door failed to catch their attention. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a pretty late update but here we go hdfjfh Don't worry the next chapter is gonna be more lighthearted and no Hilda did not (completely) spill the beans since this is something Ashe needs to work through 
> 
> A few things! I was thinking about maybe recruiting a few more characters, if you guys are on board with idea. Note: This /is/ an Ashe centered story but it'd also save students from any possible future deaths and I could try to work in some time with them chatting with Ashe + Golden Deer co. Idk why but Lysithea, Ashe & Bernie seems like they'd make a great trio 
> 
> After or near the time-skip I might make a side-story in Claude's POV after some certain chapters in this fic(cause we all know who was eavesdropping at the end of this chapter) 
> 
> Anyway, rambling over thank you all for reading, commenting & leaving kudos!! I appreciate the feedback!! <3


	25. Welcome Wagon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the ceremony at the holy tomb approaching Byleth decides to recruit more students. Who better to welcome them than Claude and Ashe?

It’s a blessing how lately everything had become so serene.   


Ashe was entirely thankful for the slow days that ended peacefully. After all that’s happened he can hardly recall when he dreaded the deafening silence.   


Hardly anything was quiet now, especially with the exciting news of new classmates to come. Claude was the first to tell him; all casual of course, but the grin gave away how he felt on the subject.

It also lead to Ashe being tasked with baking cookies for the newcomers.   


_ “Everyone likes gifts, that’s a known fact. Plus they’d love getting sweets from the sweetest person I know.” _

Ashe was already onboard with the idea, but it was pretty hard to not be tongue tied after that. Least it gave him a reason to excuse himself and get to baking.   


“You think they’ll like these?” Ashe says, waving the basket filled with various small wrapped bags of cookies. When it came to cooking he was an expert, but baking always had a mixed reaction. If he could eat them then surely others could, right?   


But what if they didn’t like sweets—

“They’ll love them,” Claude states, interrupting the beginning of Ashe’s internal panic. “I’ve had your cookies before so trust me when I say that. Plus you’re the best cook I know, so why wouldn’t they?”   


Something warm bubbles in Ashe chest and he can’t help but soak in the compliment. It always made him feel bashful being on the receiving end, but sometimes it was okay to silently accept them.

_ ‘Hope I’m not getting egotistical.’  _ Ashe tries not to frown at that thought and instead shakes it off.

“I’m afraid they’re not as creative as the ones I made for your birthday,” To be fair he was trying to hurry with the baking task and he’s sure his new classmates wouldn’t be fond of having one or more deformed cookies. “A-and.. I made them specially for you anyway.”   


Ashe nearly misses the surprised look on Claude’s face who quickly covers it up with a blinding smile. It conflicted himself when he said such things and often contemplated if he should have just kept it to himself.   


But seeing a warm reaction like that was worth how flustered it made him.

They make it to their destination, which was just Bernadetta’s room since Claude mentioned she never really left her room. Sometimes it worries Ashe to how much Claude knows when it comes to people in general, but at least this was just a well known rumor.

Claude knocks on the door and they both stand as they eagerly wait to see their new classmate.

...

.. Or maybe not? Claude and Ashe share a glance before Claude knocks again.   


“W-what do you want? I’m not drawing if you think that’s what’s going on!” Sounds of supplies dropping can be heard not even a beat after. Ashe smiles at that little fact. Maybe her and Ignatz would get along well with that same interest.

Oh, look at him. Already thinking of possible friendships.   


“As your new house leader I’d like to welcome you to the Golden Deer!” Claude brims with the confidence Ashe has come to know and love. “As much as I dread formalities teach thought it’d be good for us to welcome you.”   


“And we brought cookies.” Ashe chimes in a little too happily.   


That at least gets the door cracked open, but it’s still hard to see Bernadetta. Claude and Ashe still make the effort to lean into her view to give welcomed smiles.   


“Hope you have as much fun as I have.” Ashe says softly and holds out one of the many bags of cookies. It delights him when Bernadetta gently takes the bag, but then closes the door right after.   


Just before they both turn away they hear a muffled, “thank you” through the door. Ashe chuckled at the fact that it was also said with Bernadetta having a mouthful of food.   


Least she was enjoying herself.   


“You’ll have to excuse Bern,” Dorothea says as her and Petra approach them. It’s quite convenient actually since they’re also new to the Golden Deer house. “She always tends to be nervous, but she means well.”   


“We’re acquainted now and I think she took a liking to Ashe. Which is completely relatable.”   


Ashe tries to ignore the heat in his face and quickly holds out the basket of sweets. “H-here’s some for you guys too.”   


“Bernadetta will like these very much. Her tooth is sweet— ah, she has a sweet tooth.” Petra says as she observes the cookies, with Dorothea smiling and nodding in agreement.

“That’s good to know,” Ah, Ashe recognized that look. It’s the same way Claude gets when he’s saving information for later. Was he going to try and lure Bernadetta out of her room with sweets? “Anyway, the welcome wagon is here to greet you with open arms— and cookies.”   


Petra furrows her eyebrows and tilts her head. “But I do not see a wagon anywhere.”

“It’s just an expression, Petra,” Dorothea giggles, but has the softest smile when she looks over at Petra before back to them. “You guys didn’t have to go out of your way, but thanks. We’re glad to be here.”   


Ashe can’t help but feel fuzzy at that.

*****   
**

It’s not until the next day when Ashe walks into class that he’s greeted by Mercedes and Annette nearly tackle hugging him. He’s not surprised to see them, not when he and Claude already greeted them.   


And to Ashe’s embarrassment they kept singing his praises about his baking. It didn’t help when Claude got in on the ‘fun’ and Ashe had never been so grateful to hear the harmonious chime of the monastery bell ringing.   


“It’s so great to be in the same class as you again.” Mercedes hums and fixes Ashe’s hoodie after her and Annette nearly ran into him. He missed that— how she could be like an older, caring sibling at times.

“Yeah! We missed seeing you, but now we get to see you all the time!” Annette gives Ashe another quick hug; completely giddy about their mini reunion. It’s so infectious Ashe finds himself giggling along with the two of them.   


“There you are,” Ashe’s eyes light up by the  _ very  _ familiar tone. He doesn’t waste any time twirling around to see Ingrid standing there looking almost as happy as he feels. “I missed my book buddy.”   


Ashe doesn’t run up to her, but they meet each other halfway and embrace. It doesn’t last as long as any of his former hugs, but Ashe shifts on his feet unable to stand still. His other  _ knightly  _ friend was here! Why didn’t Claude say anything? He filled in Ashe on everyone else who was joining..

“You’ve really grown— oh! And thank you for the cookies too.”

“Cookies?” Didn’t he and Claude get rid of them all?   


“Claude gave me some this morning and said you made them.” At this Ashe turns his head to where their house leader normally sat who gave him a small wave and a wink.   


_ ‘He was surprising me.’  _ The feeling of being giddy only increases by that fact. Ashe smiles brightly at Claude and turns back to Ingrid eager to catch up.   


“You’ve grown too! There are so many books I need to lend you, stop by my room later and I’ll let you pick some out—“   


Ashe’s eyes widen at an arm suddenly wrapping around his shoulders. It startles him at first since Claude was the only one who did that and he was clear across the room.   


“Ashe! Wow, it feels like ages since I’ve seen you.” Sylvain (Ashe finally processes), grins down at him and Ashe smiles back once the shock fades away.   


“It has been several months,” Goddess it has been so long since he’s seen them. “How have you been faring?”

“Good, good..” Sylvain then lowers his head. “You didn’t tell me there were so many cute girls in class—“   


_ “Sylvain.”  _ Ingrid says coldly and that’s enough to startle the poor red head away from him. Ashe had been so used to Lorenz attempting to flirt and court girls he nearly forgot how Sylvain could be just as bad.   


Well.. They had Ingrid now at least.   


Ashe proceeds to watch the two bicker, unsure on how to split them up until their professor enters the classroom and it’s as if everyone was washed over with a sense of calmness.   


With their class filling up he can see how others would gravitate towards Byleth. As for him it was Claude who had recruited him and knowing that..   


He finds himself growing more and more grateful with each passing day.

*******

“Claude?”

The thrill and excitement of the day was almost exhausting, but Ashe still had enough energy left to roam the monastery. It was a surprise to him to see Claude wondering out of the library in the middle of the night with an unreadable expression that quickly lightened up just by his presence.

.. Or maybe his mind was playing tricks on him.   


“Fancy meeting you here,” Claude stretches and doesn’t bother covering up his loud yawn. “I was just trying to dig up some information on the upcoming ceremony, but Seteth probably already got to those books too.”   


“Sorry your night was wasted.” Ashe rubs the back of his head. It was strange. They were keeping a lot of information away from them..

“I wouldn’t say it was a  _ complete  _ waste. Guess we’ll have to wait and see.”   


Ashe begins to follow Claude as he walks, following into a comfortable routine between the two. It briefly reminds Ashe of the food raid they did and fortunately got away with it. Even if he felt a little guilty about it the next day Claude waved away his worry by mentioning it would have gone to waste anyway.

“Things are certainly more lively now.” Ashe pipes up; their hands occasionally brushing by how close they walk.   


“More than ever. And I thought our class was wonderfully loud, rowdy and colorful before.” The two share a laugh, but something about Claude’s demeanor changes. They aren’t quite near the dorms yet, but Claude pauses once their at the end of the hall.   


“It’s nice that teach decided to bring in more deer. There’s not many you can trust, which I think is more obvious than ever after what’s been happening around the monastery. But that’s not gonna stop teach.”

It’s then that Claude turns to face Ashe, something unfamiliar about his expression. It’s serious, though not in a bad way. He can’t really place his finger on it..

“To open our hearts to one another.. That’s the bravest thing anyone can do.”

Ashe can only stare in surprise; the words actually striking a chord within him. Suddenly he feels conflicted— like a coward. It’s almost envious how Byleth, Claude— nearly everyone he knows can be so brave. But this was a different matter.

And one that he has to find his own courage for.

When Ashe doesn’t respond Claude takes him by the hand and leads him back to what Ashe assumes is his room. It knocks some sense back into Ashe, but he can hardly find his voice. The last words he says as they walk are spoken so softly he’s not even sure Claude hears him.

“It really is.”

Apparently it doesn’t fall on deaf ears at the small squeeze Claude gives his hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Claude and Ashe are basically that cute couple across the street who will welcome you to the neighborhood with baked goods and they're probably always lovey dovey 
> 
> I never wrote any of these characters before (cides Ingrid) so I hope they turned out alright fdfh   
I can include Casper, Linhardt, Fernand, and Felix in the next chapter if you guys want? (Recruit every last one of them?) 
> 
> Next chapter is gonna still be pretty light hearted before we get to the next in-game chapter! Thank you all for commenting, leaving kudos & for reading!! Always appreciate it! <3


	26. Moment Lost in Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers(?): References to various supports.

By the third week of the month their classroom was overly crowded with new classmates. Not a day went by that there wasn’t a moment of silence until Byleth would come in and become the peacekeeper.   


At the same time it was fun to watch his old classmates interact with the new ones. Felix and Leonie were getting along more than he thought they would, Lysithea started seating herself beside Bernadetta who tended to hide behind books, and even Marianne made small talk on occasions.

Claude looked absolutely thrilled at the progress everyone was making— as if these new bound friendships were something to be savored. The feeling was mutual, even if Ashe wasn’t a busy bee like their house leader was.   


That’s not to say he didn’t get around. Using his secret skill of bargaining he was able to help Petra out with shopping, had short conversations with Bernadetta through her door on the way back to his and even got to bake again with Mercedes. Annette and Ingrid were  _ very  _ happy about that.   


He even got along well with Caspar, someone who you’d think he wouldn’t work out with but somehow did. Caspar had a louder, more aggressive personality than him, but they managed to find common ground.   


..Which happened to be a cat. Hey, you can bond over animals. Him, Marianne and Dorte proved as much.   


Then there was poor Claude who got an earful from Ingrid. He’s not sure what about, since Claude wasn’t too keen on sharing the ‘gruesome’ details, but he’s sure they’d get along one way or another.   


..Maybe. Probably. It was a coin toss really.   


Upon entering the classroom Ashe notices how his usual seat is preoccupied with a sleeping Linhardt and a mildly annoyed Caspar. It was pretty much the usual, minus his seat being taken.

“Is he alright?” Ashe asks softly as to not disturb his sleeping classmate. Not like it’d matter anyway with Byleth on the way, but he had his manners.   


Caspar on the other hand, merely snorts at that. “Genius here wore himself out on his quest for knowledge.”

Linhardt can be heard sighing loudly, but doesn’t bother lifting his head. “Only because you woke me up at the crack of dawn trying to get me to  _ train  _ with you. What foolishness.”   


Before they can start bickering Ashe intervenes. “If you want some morning training you’re more than welcome to join me and Raphael. More the merrier— and I guess stronger too, right?”

“Really?! I’ll see you guys bright and early tomorrow then!”

Maybe he could get a good bit of their class to join in on the fun too. Well, if you call getting up early to exercise fun, but at least Caspar was onboard with the idea.   


Claude would probably be proud of him for being so outgoing and getting stronger with their classmates.

Speaking of which..   


Said schemer was looking his way, which did not make Ashe’s heart do a small flip(it did) when he patted the empty seat next to him. Usually Hilda sat next to him but judging by the lively chatter coming from the back of the room, it appeared she was preoccupied with Annette and Marianne this morning.   


Well.. Claude  _ is  _ offering.   


So Ashe tries not to make it show how excited he is to finally get to sit next to Claude in class. At least he could sit still but why was he getting excited over such small things?   


For Goddess’s sake they shared a bed together more than once, hugged, held hands, fed each other and  _ this  _ is what he’s excited for?

Sometimes he didn’t understand himself— or what the heart wanted.   


“Morning my everlasting sunshine,” Claude winks. “I heard we’re studying about the Goddess today. No surprise there since we  _ are  _ a week away from the big ceremony. Unfortunately that happens to be the only book I didn’t bring along with me.”   


Ashe watches as Claude leans back in his chair exhaling loudly catching a few curious looks his way. By now everyone in the Golden Deer were used to his loud overly dramatic exclaims, yet they always made Ashe chuckle.

“How about we share my book? I really don’t mind.”

“You’re a real lifesaver, freckles.” The moment Ashe opened the book up Claude was practically leaning against him. Goddess he scooted over so fast and why was it suddenly so warm?   


As Byleth enters the classroom Ashe tries to ignore the heat in his face, but finds it difficult. The class soon becomes white noise to him with Claude’s hand holding his own under the table.   


That day Ashe got no work done and realized why he never sat next to Claude in class.   


..Yet he wouldn’t be against it if the chance arises again.

*******

“I can’t believe there’s two of them now.” Claude groans, voice dripping with disdain. The topic of their small study group in the library happened to be Ferdinand and Lorenz. The two were more similar than they realized and Ashe swore they spent the whole afternoon discussing tea.   


“I think it’s nice. They really seemed to hit it off and I heard Lorenz has been cutting back on trying to court women.” To be fair he’s pretty sure that had to do with Sylvain taking Lorenz out and showing him how to flirt. Ashe happened to catch a glimpse of it while he was in the market with Petra again and well..

It went as you’d expect it to go.

“Hasn’t anyone from the former houses caught your eye?” Ashe adds in after a moment. They were supposed to be researching the Goddess yet their priority wavered. Nothing wrong with a short break anyway.

Claude pauses at the question and stares at Ashe with a glint in his eyes. “You could say that.”

“See? We’re all making new friends.” Ashe chimes happily, ducking his head when Claude decides to suddenly ruffle his hair. What was that all about?

“I caught Annette singing a few days ago and I have you to thank for helping me figure out that disturbingly cute song of hers.”   


Ashe smiles at that. He recalls Claude coming to him in the middle of the night wanting to know the history of Faerghus. Ashe told him all he could before they eventually went to the library the next day to get well informed.

“It’s been such a long time since I last heard her sing.. Leonie mentioned hearing her sing too, but she nearly jumped out of her skin at being caught.” It sounded about right. Leonie never exaggerated and Annette could easily get flustered. Unfortunately he knew that feeling all too well.   


“Speaking of Leonie, I heard your feisty friend has been dueling her lately. Is he always in a bad mood?” Claude doesn’t even seem bothered by it. In fact he looks happy by that fact. Oh, knowing Claude he probably had something up his sleeve. You’d think he’d learn with Lysithea, but now Felix?   


“No um, that’s just how Felix is. I’ve seen him smile a couple of times— don’t look so skeptical I have!” Ashe tries to hide a laugh behind his hand, choosing to ignore the glares he gets in the library and the curious look Cyril shoots him.   


“We better finish our reports before we get kicked out of the library,” Claude grins before lowering his voice and signaling Ashe to come in closer. “And then maybe we can celebrate with some tea after.”

That sounded absolutely domestic and right up Ashe’s alley. The last time he had a good cup of tea was with their professor.. It really had been so long.

“I’d like that a lot.”

*******

While there was a huge celebration at the end of the month there was also one before then— which happened to be Lysithea’s birthday.   


_ ‘Two celebrations in a row, how exciting.’ _

Usually Ashe had a theme with gifts, but this time with the helpful tip from Felix he decided to gift Lysithea with something he knew she’d love.   


“I must say you really outdid yourself, Ashe.” Lysithea hummed happily, something that was rare to be heard, looked as if she was holding back from stuffing her face full of cake. Ashe can really relate to that regarding sweets.   


“It may not be much, but I heard you like sweets. So feel free to dig in.” By now their slices of cake were nearly gone so when Lyaithea went for seconds it more than pleased him. Baking with Mercedes sure did pay off.   


_ ‘Maybe I’ll save a slice for Bernadette..’   
_

“It is a time to rejoice,” Ashe’s eyes flicker to Lysithea upon hearing her fork be set down. “I don’t believe celebrating a birthday is childish. We really shouldn’t take everyday for granted anyway. If there’s anything you need or want to do you shouldn’t hesitate. Who knows when our time will be up..” There’s something about her tone that is painfully sad, as if she knew something nobody else did. It pains Ashe to see her so worn down, and on her birthday no less.   


He wasn’t going to have any of that.   


“I’m really grateful I got to know you,” Ashe starts, this time catching Lysithea’s attention. “You’re the most hardworking out of all of us. Your magic has to be the best I’ve ever seen! And I’m especially glad to have you as a study buddy too.” Ashe chuckles, finally getting a hint of a smile from Lysithea. More than once he was glad to have someone else in the library at night.   


Lysithea doesn’t answer back immediately, but the atmosphere was starting to lift up again. Even if it was a small heart to heart he’s glad he got to tell her some encouraging words.   


“I.. Thank you.” Aww, was she getting sheepish? “I’ll cherish our friendship and our time here at the monastery. N-now enough of that, we have a perfectly good cake to get through!”

“Sounds like a plan to me.” Ashe can feel himself grin and proceeds to dig in with Lysithea; their appetite for cake no longer wavering.

It makes Ashe wonder what Lysithea’s life would be like after the monastery. All of them would be leaving soon, wouldn’t they? Graduation was approaching and Ashe wasn’t quite sure he was ready for it.   


No one really was. Everyone was getting along so well lately and as much as him and the others have been through their misfit ‘family’ was still intact. They could overcome any obstacle thrown their way.   


_ “If there’s anything you need or want to do you shouldn’t hesitate.” _

Lysithea’s words rang through his head, making him unsure how to feel on the matter. That kind of thinking was basically, ‘now or never’ and as much as he’s hesitated before he’s not sure if he can live up to it.

Maybe.. Just maybe he could confess his feelings when graduation came around. It scares him that he could potentially shatter his dream, but there’s been so many tales where a knight would confess to their Lord and  _ still  _ remain by their side.   


Claude saw potential in him. He may not be the best archer, but Claude wouldn’t ask him to be his  _ personal knight  _ if he wasn’t any good, right? And if Claude would marry even after knowing Ashe’s feelings then.. Then he would have to live with that. He’d still protect Claude no matter what.

At least then Ashe could live with Claude knowing how he felt instead of shoving his feelings down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the delay on this chapter, I was 100% dragging my feet on it because y'all know what the next chapter means so I'm over here sweating bullets 
> 
> Thank you all for leaving comments, kudos & for reading!! <3


	27. Conflict in the Holy Tomb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Major spoilers for in-game chapter 11 & the identity of the Flame Emperor.

One would believe a ceremony would be celebrated and go on without a hitch. Which, is what they all thought; assumed. And it was at first, though their professor didn’t receive a divine revelation like Rhea had thought he would. Even sitting upon the throne that once belonged to the Goddess nothing happened.

Odd.

There was however unwelcome visitors— and from the Imperial Army no less! Out of all those they faced what would the Empire gain from crest stones?

Well, no matter, their task was to guard the tombs and protect the crest stones. It was a hard task considering the Flame Emperor was leading the small army and they brought along  _ demonic beasts _ .

Great.. Just great.

Ashe wasn’t a fan of guard duty, especially with how anxious it made him seeing Claude get out of his sight with each step taken. Of course he’d want to pursue the Flame Emperor. It wasn’t their first time meeting anyway, but if he got hurt..   


No. Claude would be fine. No one got hurt on the professor’s watch. And the addition of classmates provided to be helpful allies amongst the underground grave.

Ashe shakes his head and raises his bow, releasing an arrow at an enemy who ventured close to Ignatz. Said painter looked startled by the sudden arrow and enemy (hadn’t he noticed?) and gave Ashe a small bow.

Ashe finds himself smiling and gives a wave back returning his attention back to the battlefield. A place of holiness really  _ shouldn’t  _ be called a battlefield yet that’s exactly what it was.   


Magic, arrows, swords, lances, axes— everything was clashing. From Ashe’s position at the tomb he can see Rhea far away from harm, but she looks positively  _ pissed.   
_

It makes Ashe shiver. Even Cyril, who admired Rhea so much looked chilled by her cold look. How a holy woman that tends to be so soft spoken can look that way.. Well, it was understandable yet surprising to say the least.   


“Oh Goddess, please protect us..” Marianne could be heard at the neighboring tomb, with Bernadetta looking rather grim by the prayer. There were less enemies than had started but at least Lysithea, Leonie and Raphael we’re finishing up the last demonic beast.   


It’s almost humorous how Raphael could go up to a distorted monster and simply just.. Punch it. Well.. At least it did damage.

“Why must we fight down here..” Mercedes sighs, leaving her post by Ashe to go heal their fellow classmates. It’s understandable to be distressed over such an unfitting fight. They all expected a revelation, celebration and guidance.

Not.. All of this.

“We don’t really have a choice.” Ashe says more into the air than to anyone. Mercedes was already out of earshot, but it was true. The Flame Emperor came looking for a fight and that’s exactly what they’re getting.

From where he stood it was really inspiring to watch their professor and Claude cut through the intruders like they were nothing. He knew Claude didn’t care for any unnecessary blood to be shed, but it was always the same reason. If not them, then it’d be their class.   


Ashe would rather kill grave robbers than lose anyone else dear to him.

By the time his twelfth arrow successfully hit its mark Byleth was already going head to head with the Flame Emperor. From where he stood there was nothing but lifelessness all around. It was a little nerving about all the bodies surrounding them.. Just another ugly reminder that they were standing in a literal graveyard.   


Ashe shudders not wanting to know what would happen to the intruders remains.   


Sounds of clashing metal echoed throughout the tomb and even though their professor had just struck at the Flame Emperor the battle was already decided. Byleth had the upper hand weapon-wise and all of their enemies so far were very far away from the experience he had as a mercenary.

Ashe can only let out a sigh of relief upon hearing the axe fall and his classmates looking equally relieved.

“Is this some sick joke? The Flame Emperor is actually Edelgard?!”

Claude’s words echoed loudly throughout the tomb, causing an uproar of confusion and distress from him and his classmates.   


Ashe nearly drops his bow at this sickening discovery.

*******

Edelgard and Hubert had somehow managed to escape their grasp and news soon came that as the new Emperor she was declaring war. So of course the monastery was a complete mess. Villagers were having to flee and be escorted to safety, the knights of Seiros couldn’t catch a break and his classmates were anything but calm. Even when it was quiet there was a grim evil in the air that everyone knew what meant.

Soon they all would have to fight— to defend a place where one could be happy and carefree. Ashe was scared yet he was ready to fight. They all had to and he was by no means going to run away like a coward. They  _ have  _ to win.

As determined as he felt, even getting a personal reassurance from their professor, there was something that awaited him.

A letter was addressed to him from the House of Rowe. House of Rowe was located right next to his own, House of Gaspard, and the knight Gwendal was one of Lonato’s old acquaintances. Perhaps even friends. Ashe never stuck around long when the knight would visit. Christophe would always escort him away, but looking back on it his older brother was only shielding him from seeing his adoptive father being drunk.   


Lonato tended to hide how hung over he was the next morning, but Ashe could laugh at the memory of him fretting over his father being sick when it was just the alcohol’s after effect.

With the letter open Ashe couldn’t stop his hands from shaking. It was from Gwendal as he expected, however..

_ “As you’ve heard by now the Empire has declared war. Forces will soon intrude into the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus and there is no doubt they will threaten to take over those bordering around the Adrestian Empire. House of Rowe, House of Gaspard and the Western Church will soon be targeted. As Lonato’s son, and the new leader of House Gaspard you must know where your fate lies. I understand that the emperor plans to make a direct attack on the monastery so your presence shall be requested back to your home during the time of the Great Tree Moon.” _

The letter fell from Ashe’s hands and his heart felt as if it was being tightly squeezed. One month from now he’d have to leave the monastery..   


..And go to war by himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for short(ish?) chapter, and sorry the last few chapters have been kinda slow, BUT we're getting into the action now and I'm very hyped for the next chapter because I've had said part planned out for months now(my notes are so messy) and aaaaaahhh dhjfhdj 
> 
> Thank you all for commenting, reading & leaving kudos!! Always appreciated!! <3


	28. Heart to Heart

Ever since Gwendal’s letter arrived Ashe had been nothing but depressed. Could you really blame him? Anyone would be upset over war, but going without his friends? How were you supposed to adapt to new allies so quickly?   


He didn’t want to go, but it was his duty as Lonato’s son.. He  _ had  _ to go back whether he liked it or not.   


Ashe’s demeanor was masked, but he’s sure his classmates were starting to notice. If not all, some. There were a lot of things on their mind— you know mainly the  _ war.  _ They had their own troubles so to him it made no difference if he cried himself to sleep and came to class the next day with red and dark eyes.   


Was it selfish to be caught up in his own affairs? He wasn’t even sure what was going to happen to everyone.. Surely they received news of going home too. Or maybe they didn’t. Not all of them had a home to go back to and the very thought twists him up on the inside.   


What would possess Edelgard to do this? To destroy the tranquility of the monastery and tear Fodlan into war.. It was incomprehensible to him. To everyone really.   


They say you should enjoy the good times while they lasted, yet Ashe and the others could not. The church was preparing for war with Edelgard’s army advancing towards the monastery and if they weren’t stressing over that then Byleth had them training or giving them the day off. There was little to no studies which meant more free time and after a week straight of bow practice Ashe was already sick of the routine.

Ashe didn’t even have the motivation to go to the library or the greenhouse anymore. Instead of being cooped up in his room he sat on the dock watching the fish swim by with his shoes barely dangling above the water. Even if the world was burning there still could be those who could enjoy what was left..

“There you are,” Claude says; relief ringing through Ashe’s ears. It only makes his heart ache since he may not see him again. “I’ve been looking all over for you.”   


Claude’s voice is soft and it manages to soothe Ashe even if it were a little. Sometimes Claude could treat him like the most delicate thing in the world.. And Ashe would be lying if he said he hated it.   


“My apologies I didn’t mean for you to..” Ashe lets his words trail off upon feeling a hand ruffle his hair as Claude takes the empty seat next to him. It was his way of saying, ‘you have nothing to apologize for’. Day by day he got better at reading Claude and now..   


“You’ve been out of sorts lately, and yes I know there’s a war looming over us, but that’s not what I’m getting at. I want to know what’s happening with  _ you  _ specifically.” Ah.. Of course he’d notice. Claude was always so observant especially with him. Always being a shoulder to lean on and breaking the tension whatever way he could.   


More the reason to love him.

Wordlessly Ashe takes out the crumbled up letter in his jacket and hands it over to Claude. Ashe only glances at Claude before casting his eyes back on the fish. Something about Claude’s expression hardening was something he didn’t necessarily care for.

“There’s not much I can do about it,” Ashe starts; tone broken and defeated. “If I don’t return home to help my allies I’ll be labeled as a coward— or possibly a traitor. There’s no doubt the Imperial Army is going to target more than just the monastery. As Lonato’s son, it's my duty to defend my homeland..”   


Ashe turns to Claude; a sad smile on his face and his eyes blinking away tears— when did he start crying? Well, no matter..

“I feel as if everything around me is shattering. I can only wish we win this war and for everyone to come out safely.. If our paths ever cross again I’d love to take you up on your offer, given it still stands. I may not be your knight now or anytime soon, but one day if you’ll still have me..”   


“But there’s also something else I’ve been meaning to tell you— that I’ve been  _ wanting  _ to say for so long.” Ashe pauses, letting out a hollow laugh. “This isn’t how I wanted this to go, but I’ve got nothing to lose—“

“Can I say something first?” The question came out more as if it weren’t one. Like Claude purposely interrupted him, knowing where the conversation may or may not have lead to. It hardly offended him, so Ashe gave a short nod, wiping the tears out of his eyes.   


“You know how hard it is for me to sit still if I don’t get to speak after a while,” Claude sends a small smile his way before continuing. “My offer will  _ always  _ remain open to you. One way or another you’ll be my knight, so get those doubts out of that pretty little head of yours.”   


“I don’t think you realize how much you mean to me. From the moment you joined the Golden Deer I’ve always been looking out for you, even if you weren’t by my side. There’s been a number of times during battle where you’ve nearly made my heart stop. Seriously, is it any wonder why I try to keep you away from the front lines? You’re  _ special  _ to me, Ashe. I figured you’d get a clue by now, but talk about oblivious. But I guess that’s another part of you I find so endearing.”

And before Ashe can even begin to process the deep meaning of those words Claude kisses him. Sweet, soft and chaste— it’s no wonder Ashe kisses back just as eagerly. It’s almost bordering on desperation by how long he’s been  _ wanting  _ this. If the kiss is any indication it’s more than obvious to him now how much Claude has been wanting it too.   


Ashe doesn’t even realize Claude has his hands rested on top of his own until they eventually break off for much needed oxygen. The chill of the evening air hits his heated face, but the embarrassment he may feel is nothing compared to how free his heart finally is.   


“You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting to do that. Glad to know I wasn’t the only eager one.” Claude laughs breathlessly, allowing their foreheads to bump together before pulling back. “Then again I’ve known for awhile anyway.”

Ashe sputters. “You— you  _ knew? _ ” Goddess he  _ was  _ obvious, wasn’t he?

“You didn’t hide it very well,” Claude hums. “And I suspected you felt the same. I  _ might  _ have eavesdropped on a conversation between you and Hilda. It only confirmed my suspicions anyway. I could barely sleep a wink that night!”   


That would explain all the looks Claude gave him the next day. He was so paranoid that day about Claude knowing.. But he knew now and Ashe was actually  _ relieved  _ about it. Go figure.

“I must confess that before the ball I eavesdropped on you as well,” Ashe admits sheepishly. Such a vivid memory of when Claude was asking the point to courting someone if it weren’t out of love. “I thought— well, part of me hoped to have a chance after that, but never in my life would I’ve imagined that you..”

“Ashe,” Claude moves a hand away from his own, using it to caress his face that Ashe leans against. His thumb wiped away any tears that threatened to fall down his face, but this time they were no longer ones of sadness.   


“I truly hope you know what I meant when I said you’re special to me. Allow me to make things crystal clear so you don’t stay up all night trying to decipher the very,  _ very  _ obvious,” Ashe flushes at Claude’s soft laughter. After everything— after being so  _ naive  _ he deserved that.

“I love you. And no matter what happens I’ll  _ always  _ love you.”   


By now Ashe can’t utter a single word from the tears that refused to stop. So instead of speaking Ashe ultimately decides for now actions speak louder. It’s enjoyable to see the flicker of surprise coming from Claude when Ashe is the one initiating the kiss. It’s pretty clumsy, bear with him this was his second kiss, but after bumping noses they end up finding the other; breathless laughter coming from the both of them.

With his heart taking the lead it makes Ashe realize how he hasn’t felt this good in  _ years _ .   


Although enemy troops were advancing on them, no one could take away the moment they shared together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally after 28 chapters here you all go. <3 
> 
> I hope this turned out alright, because yes Claude /did/ know what that spiraling conversation was leading up to and he wasn't about to let Ashe pour his heart out when the poor boy's heart was so torn up. 
> 
> Hope it was worth the wait and there is much more yet to come! Thank you all so much for commenting, leaving kudos & for reading! I always appreciate it! <3


	29. Fight & Defend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers for in-game chapter 12.

Shortly after their heart to heart their whole class was required to meet Alois and the professor due to enemy forces approaching more rapidly than they anticipated. It was highly embarrassing having Alois startle them away from their kissing, gushing about “young love”, but even after that Claude remained to hold his hand until they met up with their group. 

Before they got their bows, lances, swords— anything necessary for battle, Claude pulled him aside, voice low and quiet for only his ears.

_ “Promise me, no matter what, we’ll meet again. I have confidence in this battle, but if things turn to worse I need you to retreat. There’s no shame in running away. I want to live to be able to fulfill my dream, and that future is one I want to see with you. With everyone. So no being reckless and dying on me, alright?” _

Ashe could only swallow dryly at the weight of those words and give Claude the best short answer he could muster up. Even now, as he stands ready to defend the east gate, one they had just conquered, the words linger in his mind. 

Troops, allies, his friends— they were all ready to defend the monastery together. To protect Lady Rhea and everything they’ve come to love. The professor was even letting Claude take help in being their tactician. No wonder their house leader directed him to the east gate since there were barely any threats other than a few imperial soldiers and the Death Knight. 

Which would have scared Ashe months ago, but with Lysithea around he was little to no threat.

Compared to the demonic beasts and Hubert positioned on the west gate it’s no doubt Claude had wanted him, Ignatz, Marianne, Lysithea, Bernadetta, Annette, Mercedes, and Linhardt away from the other gate for a reason.

_ “There’s been a number of times during battle where you’ve nearly made my heart stop. Seriously, is it any wonder why I try to keep you away from the frontlines?” _

Of course. A battle this intimidating would weigh much more on Claude and Dimitri. Future leaders forced to fight the Adrestian Empire, and Edelgard herself. Byleth almost seemed reluctant at the idea of fighting someone he once saved— a former student no less, but so many lives were at stake. And with Lady Rhea out on the field watching over all of them there was no time to hesitate.

This was the beginning of a war after all. As unreasonable as it may be to many of them the only thing they could do was fight back.

Bernadetta stood beside him; hands shaking as she fumbled with her bow an arrow. It reminded him of his first battle when he was filled with nothing but anxiety. There were very few who actually looked forward to battle and it’s safe to say he was not one of those people. 

“Hey,” Ashe doesn’t make direct contact with her, not wanting to rattle her anymore than she already is but does offer a smile. “Why don’t you take over the ballista?” 

“A-aren’t you using it?” They only recently acquired it, but it made no difference to him who took control of it. As long as they weren’t on the enemy side that is.

“You should use it,”  _ It’s safe and away from the enemy’s grasp.  _ “I can hide in the bushes and attack from there,”  _ What would Claude say in this situation?  _ “Don’t worry, I’ve had plenty of experience sneaking around.” Which was more true than anyone thought.

The wink that followed may have been a bit extra and unneeded but Bernadetta fumbled with her words before retreating to the ballista. In the end it worked and he got to get closer to the enemy troops so his nervous classmate wouldn’t have to.

Ashe doesn’t have nerves of steel, he knows this much, but at that moment he could at least say he was finally proud of himself.

“Won’t they spot you the moment you shoot an arrow?” Lysithea rolls her eyes. He can already hear how “childish” his plan must be. “At least let me back you up. I’ll send them flying.” 

“Y-Yeah, you don’t have to do anything on your own. We’re here!” Ignatz says, looking like he was mustering up courage as well. 

“The Goddess and us are here to protect you.” Marianne chimes in and Ashe has never felt so proud of them. They were troubled too, but actually  _ confident  _ when it came to having each other’s back. 

Ashe can’t help how his eyes glisten over and the grin that soon follows. 

“I gladly put my faith in all of you!” 

*******

It’s hard to tell how much time has passed, and it’s especially hard when smoke fills the air thanks to fires set off by the mages from the Imperial Army. A diversion to scatter, hinder and confuse them but the sky isn’t what Ashe is looking for or at. 

Edelgard had more planned than they thought. A reserve troop was sent to ambush them, of course she had backup. The numbers were incredibly large compared to the small army the monastery had. Not to mention they had even  _ more  _ demonic beasts.

How much more would they have to endure?

It set Ashe’s heart into a panic when he was unable to locate any of his classmates. By now they all moved away with the professor to keep close to the monastery but there were so many troops and now their professor was running—

_ Where is everyone? _

Students who could no longer fight were fleeing and screaming, but then a  _ dragon  _ came from the sky to fight back. Oh thank the Goddess, it was on their side. Maybe the Goddess sent it there to help them or she was extremely enraged that her sanctuary was being attacked.

No matter the reason Ashe was grateful. 

Less so when the dragon was tackled down by a group of demonic beasts. Why can’t luck be on their side just this once? It really wasn’t a whole lot to ask for— for them wanting to  _ live  _ and regain peace once more.

It terrified Ashe when he sent out his last arrow and had to ditch his bow for a lance found on the ground. Make do with what the enemy leaves behind. All those years that Lonato trained him by lance— oh, how he was entirely grateful for that now. 

_ ‘Lonato.. Please, lend me your strength.’  _

“Try this!” Ashe yells, swinging the lance at a few soldiers heading this way. It was a bit satisfying seeing them topple over and it also helped reassure him that while he didn’t have the  _ best  _ upper arm strength he was still pretty skilled with a lance.

But it was also a reminder that he, and everyone else had their limits. No matter how many times he swung the lance either it or him was bound to break. With every swing meant energy was draining from his some-what frail body. He was nearly breathless by the time he had about twenty enemy soldiers on the ground.

His hands were red and his breathing was starting to hurt, but if he could  _ just  _ keep going.. 

“What are you still doing here? You are to flee!” 

Ashe jumps at Seteth’s stern tone and straightens up his posture. His breathing is hard to control and he knows he’s not fooling anyone,  _ especially  _ Seteth with the, ‘I can still fight’ act. 

“We can’t afford to lose anyone else,” There’s a bitterness to Seteth’s tone that makes Ashe shiver. How many students, knights, teachers,  _ classmates  _ were gone..? “The Knights Of Seiros are taking over now. Your classmates are already on their way home as we speak.” 

This puts Ashe at ease, if only momentarily. 

“I suggest you do the same.” 

Seteth doesn’t budge until Ashe finally regains movement and turns to flee from the tragedy. There’s a moment when he pauses, just to look back and sees Seteth riding off on his wyvern to go join the war tearing apart the monastery.

Knowing his classmates were getting to safety was enough to relieve his heart and let his legs move faster than he’s ever had to run in his life. 

Tears stung his eyes and blurred his vision, his lungs were burning, but he had to live. It’s what Claude and the others would want. 

From all the pain he was enduring it was a thought Ashe kept repeating over and over in his head as he made the long lonesome journey back home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time we're going into the time-skip. I didn't think it'd take me 29 chapters to get to the time-skip but alas, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter despite how much I suck at battle scenes and don't write nearly enough(but I'm pretty quick to update so maybe that makes up for it?). Angst is on the way, but don't worry it's not going to last too long, I intend to get back into the fluff parts a lot of you (and I) love before the month ends. 
> 
> Thank you all for commenting, leaving kudos and for reading!! <3


	30. Five Dreaded Years

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I can't even pretend to be empty."

_ Year 1 _

With the fall of house Rowe the Imperial Army soon took over House Gaspard. Both houses fought with all their might, but in the end it wasn’t enough. Even someone like Gwendal knew better than to throw away his life. Their weapons were discarded and soon enough Ashe was now a part of Edelgard’s forces. 

It was a bitter feeling having to give up knowing all of his efforts were in vain. But he had no choice. It was do or die and he didn’t want to meet his end. 

There was so much he wanted to live to see.. So many people he wanted to reunite with if the Goddess showed even an ounce of mercy on his soul.

So all he could do was grit his teeth and follow orders. 

It bothered him to no ends how fast and easily Gwendal adjusted to their new life. He didn’t even want to be here! So many years spent in Faerghus Ashe would have adjusted. But now he was back to living in a waking nightmare that he couldn’t escape.

There was _ one _way he thought of.. 

As dark as the thought was and how it lingered in his head every now and then he didn’t want to die. Death was always a fear of his, but losing those important to him was his greatest fear.

_ “You’ll just have to accept it. Our hands are tied unless you want them cut off.” _

Gwendal was no help at all, but even after a year, it was still hard to accept fate.

It made him wonder what lies ahead for his former classmates..  
  


_Year 2 _   
  


By the time Ashe reached the age of nineteen he felt as if age was weighing heavily on him. He had, by no rights, to complain. There were many in his army with scars and here he was untouched. 

Internally though he was a mess. 

From all the intel he could gather the monastery was in shambles, Rhea was missing and so was their professor. 

_ Byleth_, he reminds himself.  
  
It hurts how he’s no longer the optimistic student from back then and it strikes him how bad his appearance must look. He’s let himself go in the past few years, but he’s still fit for a fighter. Well, sniper now. 

If anything he should consider himself lucky to be stationed as a guard in his hometown. All he did was follow Gwendal’s orders now, but the days were painfully slow. 

Nothing necessarily felt safe either. Half of their army was filled with imperial soldiers who loomed over them despite Gwendal being promoted to commander. 

They weren’t as bad as Ashe thought, but after witnessing what they’d do to anyone who opposed them.. 

Let’s just say it’s not something Ashe was ignorant enough to do.

For the first time in years Ashe finds himself mixing herbal remedies every morning just so he doesn’t become deemed worthless to his new allies. 

Maybe it’d actually smother his depression too.  
  


_Year 3_   
  


As Ashe turns twenty he decides to make a change. Nothing drastic, just a new hairstyle. No more ruffled hair and as he inspected himself in the mirror it turned out to be a nice, well maintained look for himself. It made him feel a little older too. 

That was probably a silly thought, but it at least it made him feel better about himself. 

Even his dark, tired circles around his eyes were finally fading after three years. It makes him wonder if Marianne still has hers.

Not to mention he also hit a huge growth spurt. It almost made him miss being able to shrink down and hide, but now he stood tall in his new blue tunic. 

He eventually learned his allies weren’t so bad either when you got to know them. Compared to the guards that patrolled around the town the new rookies were certainly more approachable. Maybe that’s why Gwendal took such a liking to them, because they were good at heart deep down.

Most were rookies trying to learn their way around weapons, but Ashe put in the effort to teach them a few bow tricks he learned back in his monastery days. The look of awe they gave him finally had him smiling after three years. 

It felt odd to do so after so long, but it didn’t matter. He was moving on. He was _ trying _to move on. 

When he wasn’t training or on guard duty Ashe spent the majority of his time cooking. The rookies expressed their love for his food and after that day Ashe continued with the routine. 

He’s almost forgotten what it felt like to share a meal with friends, taking him back to his Golden Deer days of rowdy feasts, arguments and laughter that could be heard every evening by their class..

“Is that necklace from an old flame or something? You’re always wearing it.” One of the rookies pointed out to him one evening as they were finally given a moment of rest. It’s the first time anyone asked anything about him other than where he came from.

After all these years he refused to go without the necklace Hilda gifted him. It reminded him so much of the others— something so sentimental he could never get rid of. 

_ “Claude knows I'm pretty good with making accessories and as I said he suggested it. He even got me all the ingredients I needed! Personally I would have added gems, but I didn't want to make it pop out too much since I'm not familiar with your tastes, but I have to say Claude was right. That violet does really match.” _   
  
_ “It’s my favorite flower actually.” _   
  
_“Oh, I know. Claude was the one who told me. Consider it a gift from the both of us.”_

“Something like that.” Ashe smiles fondly at the necklace, idly twisting the bottle around in his hand. It still remained as beautiful as ever. Maybe crafting and making accessories is what Hilda was going to pursue. 

No one was ever disappointed in her craftsmanship after all.

“Of course someone like you would have a distant love awaiting your arrival!” They had no idea how painfully true that was. His heart nearly drops at that, but he tries his best not to show it and to down the rest of his drink.

As he laughs and smiles along with his fellow troops the hollowness inside remains to wound him.

  
_Year 4_   
  


Ashe has learned very little in his time with the enemy army until now. He’s learned to swallow his feelings, put on a mask and play the part of the ‘happy Adrestian sniper.’

It’s one day that Ashe is patrolling the town that he hears two guards gossiping. Oh, how his trait of eavesdropping never faded. It came especially handy when it came to pick up information from the imperial’s. 

“I heard the Leicester Alliance has a new leader now.” Leicester Alliance.. That was where Claude was. The very place Claude wanted him to follow to—

No.. No more of those thoughts. At night they came bursting through, but during the day he needed to compose himself. 

“I think his name is Claude..? Apparently he’s really laid back, which means it’ll be an easy victory for us.” 

After that everything else was white noise to Ashe. _ Claude. _

It was the first time in _ years _he’s heard anyone speak his name. And he was a leader now— Ashe couldn’t be anymore proud of him. It was like a flood hitting him with thoughts on how everyone was faring, if Claude was forming his own army— how he was going to take on the Adrestian Empire. 

Ashe had to hide in an alley to hide his smiling, tearful face. Goddess he was _ so _proud and relieved. It was the first bit of hope he had and he refused to let go of it.

It was suffocating not being able to talk about his personal life, but it terrifies Ashe of what they’d do to him if they _ knew _he had connections to Claude. They could use him to their advantage, having Claude step down and threatening to kill someone he loves. 

If time didn’t make them grow apart then perhaps..

_ “I love you. And no matter what happens I’ll always love you.” _

They weren’t words of sweet nothings, Claude had truly meant it. Which is more reason for Ashe to keep a low profile. No one truly knew him and that’s how it should be. 

Sometimes it pays to be a closed book, even if it pains you.

  
_Year 5_   
  


It may have been months ago, but Ashe never forgets about the promise they all made to reunite.

Broken promise in his case.

He often wonders if any of his classmates changed their looks too or what they were doing with their lives now. There was a war in the way of course, but maybe _ one _of them achieved something. 

Or they were getting stronger and preparing for when they had to be involved in this senseless violence. 

Anything involving his old classmates tended to always distract him and get scolded by the older guards or teased by the younger rookies. 

It was hard to think straight when his mind constantly got lost in daydreams of what could be or what could happen. 

So it nearly has him jumping out of his skin when Gwendal throws a bow at him. Ashe would have sworn he was angry if not for the grin on his face. Ashe had learned quickly that, _ that _was never a good sign. So many rookies learned the hard way when it came to training with their commander.

“Prepare for war, kid! We’re finally heading out of this prison. We’ve got reports from our spy that the Leicester Alliance is secretly gathering troops in Ailell. They’re just a small group of puny children, so I don’t expect much of a fight.” 

“In the Valley of Torment? Who exactly are we fighting, sir..?” Ashe asks curiously. It’s rare when they have to head out on missions that aren’t in Faerghus. Not that he was complaining, Goddess knew how long he’s been wanting to leave even if they had to come back. 

Either way it was freedom to him.

“They go by the ‘Crest of Flames.’ Claude of the Lester Alliance is leading them too, so make sure to put up a good fight. I heard he’s got a lethal shot with the bow, so try to show him up. We may be fighting for Adrestian Empire, but it’s your duty as Lonato’s son too.” 

“..Yes, sir.” 

It took every ounce of him not to stumble away, not to go into a panic attack and not show how much he was _ freaking out. _His hands couldn’t stop shaking, even as he begrudgingly filled his quiver with arrows. 

In five years Ashe never heard of a group called the Crest of Flames. Goddess don’t tell him.. That was Claude and his old classmates, wasn’t it? It had to be— 

Nausea hit him like a brick and his teeth gritted as to not lose his lunch. He can’t do this. He can’t have _ their blood _ on his hands. He was being sent out to _ kill _Claude and his friends.

This was just cruel. This wasn’t the reunion he wanted. How was he supposed to fight everyone he came to cherish and love? 

“Are you alright? You look as white as a sheet.” A rookie asks beside him with a handful of arrows. Right. They were all preparing to fight his friends. 

At least they weren’t as skilled as Claude and the others. But either way someone was going to die so there really wasn’t any good outcomes.

So Ashe smiles; wavering and hollow, his eyes never leaving his bow and refusing to make eye contact with anyone else. “I’m fine.” 

He wasn’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter didn't turn out exactly how I wanted it to do, but good enough I guess. I haven't been feeling all too hot lately, but I hope this turned out alright. 
> 
> AND ALSO THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR 600+ KUDOS AAAA I really appreciate all the support!! I've also decided to upload a side fic for showing some chapters in Claude's POV. Or well, post-chapters, like 1.5 to show Claude's side of things and not be a repeat of everything shown so far. 
> 
> Again, thank you all so so so much for sticking along with me this far, for reading and leaving comments & kudos! <3


	31. Valley of Torment

A long, distressing journey to meet their end. That’s how Ashe saw it anyway. They barely had an army of thirty, but even then that would be nothing to the professor and his former class.

However that is a good thing. He’d rather not see anyone die, not even his new allies, yet blood had to spill one way or another. 

And if it had to be the empire’s blood and not his friends.. Then he was fine with that. It was sick to even think that way since he  _ wasn’t  _ entirely fine with it. He can only be thankful that he didn’t get attached to anyone on his current side, even Gwendal. 

Kill or be killed, why did it always result in those options? Five years of having to keep quiet— to be a good little soldier and now he may have to die not being able to live his life to the fullest. 

He knows that no matter how hard he fights,  _ if  _ he can fight that they all were walking towards a graveyard. 

The lava they met was fitting since Ashe already felt like he was in hell.

It was hard to see the expressions of his former classmates but obviously they were none too happy about the ambush. It twisted his gut when weapons could be seen being unsheathed and Ashe is beginning to feel thankful about his new position.

Who would have thought being settled by lava, that could potentially burn his feet to crisps, would be the highlight of his day?

Or maybe just being able to see all of his classmates was good enough..

Yet, he didn’t get a chance too. Everyone on foot or on horse went the other path and yet those with flying mounts didn’t bother coming his way. It had him at an utter loss. Why was his death being put on hold? 

..On second thought he should probably be thankful for that.

“Guess we gotta go to them.” The archer positioned beside him griped and started advancing on the burning coals, yet Ashe stood frozen in place. No, no he was  _ fine  _ right here. Where they were supposed to stay. 

He had cold feet in the hottest place imaginable.

The man didn’t go far, which Ashe can’t decide is good or bad, but that decision is soon decided when he sees the man readying his bow. Ashe follows his line of vision to the supposed target and feels his heart sink. 

The long strands of white were too recognizable and panic starts to settle in. If he was aiming at anyone else he’d feel the same but there stood Lysithea unaware of the danger she was in. 

“H-hey,” Ashe begins; his feet finally moving and a hand rested on the archer’s shoulder. It shocks him how much the ground burns through his boots despite only being on the coal for a few seconds. “We should stay back, you’re—“

“Knock it off!” The man hisses, smacking Ashe’s hand away. “We have a clear shot from here!” 

“Y-Yeah.. You’re right.” Ashe words are hollow, void of any emotion and his feet step off the coal. The man doesn’t pay him any mind and resumes back to preparing his bow. 

Before he had so much fear, but things are different now. And so he does something for the first time in five years, that he knows he won’t regret. 

His eyes glanced side to side, unsure if anyone was watching, though he had to act fast. With the swirl of an arrow plucked from his quiver and with a simple, quick twirl an arrow was shot. 

Ashe turned away from the gruesome scene, hearing a gurgle followed by a heavy thud from where he struck the man through the head. It was only to make it a fast and quick death, since it was perhaps the least he could do. If the man had lived he’d fear what he would have done.

This marked an act of betrayal, this he knew. But from the moment he stepped onto the battlefield he knew either way he would be betraying someone. And if he had to choose who to betray it’d be the army he was forced into and not the one that welcomed him.

Here he was having to fight in Lonato’s place, but.. He couldn’t. He can’t kill his  _ friends.  _ Was that really his duty? To act on Gwendal’s orders and throw away everyone he cherished? Lonato had acted before on his personal feelings and now Ashe was doing the same.

It wasn’t an act of vengeance or from his own suffering through five years—  _ this  _ was doing the right thing. In his eyes it's always going to remain that way.

Fortunately he managed to pull it off without getting caught, with the arrival of Judith and backup they were more preoccupied with her than him. 

Or that’s what he assumed. 

Standing wide open, not paying no mind to the knight approaching him with just a single glance, but he missed the scorn on his face, mistaking it to be directed towards the new arrivals; oblivious to the lance about to strike him.

Ashe yelps at the loud collapse behind him, armor clinking to the ground as he swirls around to find an arrow sticking out of the soldier.

For a brief second his eyes meet matching greens and a face so familiar, yet so older that Ashe is rendered breathless at the encounter. 

Above him was  _ Claude,  _ in all of his glory expression unreadable and his wyvern (he got a wyvern!) paid Ashe no mind at first until his face shifted to shock and with a hint of what Ashe thought was a smile.

Ashe’s eyes follow Claude, watching him land and dismount from his wyvern. Shouldn’t he be fighting Gwendal? Or well— looking past Claude it looked like Gwendal was having the time of his life fighting Byleth and Judith despite having the clear disadvantage. 

Gwendal must have known everything was coming to an end for their troop here as well. 

That thought leaves Ashe terrified with each step Claude took towards him. He— he was going to die by his hands, wasn’t he? Was this supposed to be fitting, unfitting? Was his life seriously going to have a tragic end?

Ashe closes his eyes expecting an axe to fall on him. 

“You’re  _ here,”  _ Instead he’s pulled into a tight embrace and the comforting sound of Claude laughing; breathless and in disbelief. Ashe can’t stop the tears from falling as he wraps his arms equally tight around Claude as if he was afraid to let go. “You have no idea, I.. You’re  _ alive—“  _ Another laugh of disbelief. “Welcome back, Ashe.”

Ashe has so many things to say,  _ “I missed you so much, I’ve been so lonely and miserable.”  _ Runs through his head and yet he can’t speak for two reasons. The first being it’s hard to talk through the tears and the other reason being that Claude was now  _ kissing him.  _

Claude’s arms had moved off him to cradle his head so he could deepen the kiss, showing Ashe that the five years had taken a toll on him too. Desperate, longing and full of love— just like their first kiss.

After five years Ashe was finally free.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And thus "hurting Ashe hours" are done with for now. Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter I could have made things so much worse than they needed to be, but I didn't wanna go that way since hasn't he suffered enough? And seriously, after this chapter when you talk to him he hardly mentions Gwendal or "his duty as Lonato's son" so I don't believe he'd be as attached to the other side compared with the Golden Deer. 
> 
> Spoilers(ish) for next chapter: we're gonna continue exactly where we left off and I just wanted to end this one a sweet note, so look forward to some much needed fluff 
> 
> Aaaa thank you all again for leaving kudos, comments & for reading!! <3


	32. Gems in the Rubble

Ashe had never felt as giddy as he did now after winning a battle. Well, he was on the enemy side to begin with but now relief has completely washed over him and he can’t seem to unhook himself from Claude. 

Claude isn’t any better either. After they part from their kiss Claude lets their foreheads rest against each other and Ashe has to try his hardest not to let a giggle slip out. 

“Look how tall you are!” Claude exclaims and before Ashe knows it he’s being hoisted up in the air; hands holding down on Claude’s shoulders with Claude’s hands under his thighs for support.

With Claude below him he finally gets a good look at him. His hair was no longer messy, almost slicked back in a way. His height didn’t seem to change too much, but Ashe isn’t taller than him despite his large growth spurt. And other than the sideburns and new outfit Claude was still the same. Though word handsome feels like an understatement. 

No longer that mischief house leader and now a true leader— like how he was meant to be. Those eyes still had a certain gleam to them, but right now they looked so soft and fond, as if they were filled with love just looking at him.

It makes Ashe want to duck his head, but being up in the air it’s.. Sort of hard to do, obviously.

“Is that how you greet all your soldiers, boy?” 

At Judith’s tone Ashe can feel his face burning and notices the way Claude grimaces. It probably wasn’t the most fitting place to have a reunion anyway. They were literally feet away from bubbling lava. 

“We’ll catch up later,” It’s almost a whisper, for only his ears and a hand is left lingering on his shoulder as Claude turns to Judith. “It’s how I greet _ my knight_. And can you quit calling me a boy in front of everyone? I'm the leader of the Alliance now. It's not proper—”

Ashe chuckles and watches Claude banter back and forth with Judith until it dawns on him that Claude just referred to him as his knight. Oh— Oh Goddess, Claude really meant it when he said the offer would always stand. It was making him lightheaded just trying to process everything—

Or, that could just be the heat. Probably both actually since this felt too good to be true. But it was and he had nothing against that. 

“It’s really you,” Ashe barely recognizes the voice and is almost floored to see it was Ignatz who was talking to him. The shy kid who just wanted to paint and now he was nearly taller than him. “I’m so used to seeing your messy hair I had to do a double take. N-not that it was that messy! It was really fluffy—“ 

Yet, still the same easily flustered painter he knew. 

“I think it looks very nice.” Marianne cuts in and looks positively radiant— even her dark circles were gone! And something about her was different, but in a good way. Time did wonders for her and Ignatz. Actually, everyone looked bedazzling.

Ashe smiles with ease and does the first thing that comes to mind which was to pull both of them in for a hug. He can tell they’re surprised by the hug; having to lean forward so his sudden force didn’t topple them over. 

Ashe believes this is the first time he smiled so much that it actually started to hurt. 

“I’ve missed you guys.” He’s a little misty eyed, but apparently so are his friends who, like him, are quick to rub their eyes after they step away from the group hug.

“You’re here now and that’s all that matters.” Marianne states softly, yet was that confidence in her tone? Time really _ did _do wonders for her. Years ago that would sound like something Claude— or anyone but her would say. 

Ashe can only nod and smile as he follows the two, joining the rest of Claude’s army— _ their _army and to finally get away from a literal hellhole. 

Any doubts Ashe may have had about being unwelcomed were no more. He was welcomed back with open arms. Literally.

*******

Ashe couldn’t believe how much his classmates had changed in the last five years. From shorter haircuts, to long styled ones he was baffled on how grown up they all looked.

Even Cyril, the youngest of them all was almost as tall as he was! He wasn’t sure if Lysithea had grown or not, but he made sure not to comment on it. Only Claude would dare voice that comment, and knowing him he probably has already.

Well, at least Ashe could break up any possible future fights between them now.

It was really hard, a true task, not to hug every classmate he saw. He was just so genuinely _ happy _ to be here— to see them all and be welcomed in once again.   
  
Raphael gave him what he’d describe to be, a bone crushing hug while crying and exclaiming how, “Your big bro here is going to protect you from here on out!”   
  
Claude was the one to save him from the hug and whisk him away, and despite feeling achy he still appreciates the encounter. It’s good to see Raphael hasn’t really changed one bit.   
  
Though he didn’t get to interact much with them yet as Claude was giving him a tour of the ruined monastery. It was really just an excuse to be alone with him and Ashe doesn’t mind at all. It was to be expected anyway, though Judith didn’t have to call them ‘lovebirds’ in front of everyone.

“I heard about this place being a wreck, but..” Oh, it was _ much _worse seeing the monastery in person. All the stories he heard about it being nothing but rubble was unfortunately true. For the most part anyway since it was still standing.

“You should have seen this place before you got here. Fortunately for us we somehow managed to spruce the place us.” Ashe shares a smile with Claude, letting him lead the way through the dormitories as their hands swung lazily together. It at least looked livable, not to mention the monastery was the perfect base of operations, what with being right in the center of Fodlan. 

What _ didn’t _look livable was his room. Ashe can’t hide the way his face grimaces towards the wreck that was formally his room. Claude lets go of his hand to allow Ashe to inspect his old room, but there wasn’t much to witness.

Dust, debris, and broken bricks were scattered around his room along with torn books. Even his bed was crushed and broken under the weight of the stones. 

“On the bright side you weren’t sleeping there when that happened.” Ashe laughs in disbelief at Claude’s comment and shakes his head. It was in some way true.

Ashe rummages through his top desk door, moving papers out of the way, even finding the old bag of candies Claude gave him so many years ago. Sweets weren’t safe to keep around him, but it was hard to eat and get rid of them when they were a gift from Claude. 

Goddess, he truly was and _ is _ hopelessly in love.

“Hm.. Ah! Here it is!” Clear in the back was, ‘Loog and the Maiden of Wind’, the very same book that Claude gave him for his birthday. He was worried it’d be torn like his other ones, but there wasn’t even a scratch on it. 

“I’m glad it’s okay. It’s actually one of the very view objects that have any meaning to me.” Ashe admits sheepishly, hugging the book close to him. Other than his necklace the book was the only thing left for him. 

“Oh? The book _ I _gave to you has sentimental value? I didn’t know you were such a romantic.” Claude grins cheekily and while Ashe’s face was fairly warm he mustered up enough courage to kiss the smile right off his face.

Or he would have liked to, since it only encouraged Claude. Not that he was mad about it anyway, in fact Claude’s good mood was quite infectious.

“I guess I should get to cleaning.. Maybe my bed can still be salvaged.” As soon as he turns his head the smile nearly falls from his face seeing tears and holes through the old mattress. “Or I can just sleep on the floor instead.” Maybe he could get some hay and work something out..

“Ashe, you’re not sleeping on the floor. Unless you want serious back problems, but I’m not having it.” Claude grabs both of Ashe’s hands, momentarily confusing him especially with the way Claude’s expression turns more serious.

“You’ll sleep with me.”

At this moment Ashe _ really _wishes they had shut the door to his room. Exactly a second after Claude was done speaking Hilda and Marianne passed by sharing giggles, and Ashe’s ears burned by the wink Hilda sent him. Claude is unfazed by none of this, to no one’s surprise.

“B-But you’re a leader and I couldn’t possibly have you share your room—“ 

“I wasn’t asking you, freckles. I’ll take it as a personal insult if you don’t accept my offer.” Oh, Claude was going to be the end of him. The attempt at a puppy look while trying not to break out into a smile made Ashe soften.

Ultimately he knew who won this ‘battle.’

“Is it really okay for me to share the same bed as you? You mentioned I was your knight and I..” Ashe trails off, unsure on where to lead the topic. Would that be too inappropriate? Improper?

“You are my knight, yes. _ And _ you’re also the person that I _ love. _Ashe, it’s more than okay. And.. I’ve missed waking up beside you. Even though we should have had sleepovers much more often back then.” This time Claude is the one looking flustered, but he laughs it off, giving Ashe a wink and Ashe can’t help chuckling at that. 

“U-um you know, back before the war you told me that you loved me and I— well I never got to say it back.” He literally had to wait _ five whole years _just to tell Claude those three big words. There were times when he thought he’d die before getting to tell him. It’s almost painful to think about.

But those days were gone now.

“I know now it’s _ really _obvious but,” Ashe chuckles nervously, quickly trying to suppress his past embarrassment before any of that mess got out. “I love you.”

Ashe lets out a yelp when Claude decides to suddenly hoist him up on his desk, lips suddenly on his and hands tightly resting on his shoulders. It takes him back how eager the kiss was compared to their quick peck they shared not even minutes ago. Ashe is so surprised he nearly drops his book.

Or maybe Claude was waiting so long just for him to say it back. He wasn’t even sure if it made a difference whether he said it or not, but it was clear now judging by the way Claude was handling him. 

“Sorry,” Claude apologies the moment he pulls away. Ashe is a little speechless and he’s still processing what just happened. At least Claude had a good grip on him otherwise he’d probably slip or fall off the desk. “I got a little over eager there.”

Well, Ashe doesn’t completely mind if Claude is the one getting flustered for once. A rare skill that only Judith seemed to possess. And maybe now him too? Should he be proud of this?

“I-if it makes you feel any better I love hearing it too.” Given the fact that he’s only heard it twice it’s a meaningful phrase he _ knows _he’ll never tire of.

“Guess you won’t have any trouble getting used to it then.” Claude hums, helping him down from the desk. Ashe is still gripping onto his book and is happy to let Claude take the lead.  
  
“Come on, let me show you to _ our _room.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mind: how much fluff do you want?  
me: yes 
> 
> This chapter was really cheesy and I apologize for that, but also we're gonna get more fluff in the next chapter so I guess I'm not that sorry. Though I am sorry for the late update, I had writers block slap me in the face this week so I'm getting over that fdhjf 
> 
> Also! My friend drew this /really/ adorable Claude/Ashe picture and I'm melting because it's so cute & sweet fhdjf so here have some bonus fluff!! https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/633955093477064704/646124184719851521/IMG_20191119_000625.jpg 
> 
> Thank you all for commenting, leaving kudos & for reading!! <3


	33. Settling In

After Ashe got settled into his and Claude’s room, (something he’s still wrapping his head around) Claude was informed of a war council meeting for their next move. Claude groaned about it, barely unable to tangle himself away from Ashe who was left to figure out what to do with the rest of his day.

At least Claude promised they’d have the whole night to share which incredibly increased his mood, that also made it clear that it was still somehow possible for Ashe to get happier than he already was.

There were so many things to do, so many people to chat with and yet it was Hilda who was the one to practically drag him into her room the moment he stepped out of his.

“There’s my favorite guy! You’re great with flowers, aren’t you? We could use an expert like yourself on making flower crowns!” It’s all the information Ashe got before he saw Marianne, Mercedes and Annette all sitting on the floor with various flowers scattered around them. 

“Oh hello, Ashe. Are you here to help us too?” Marianne asked before patting the seat next to her which Ashe took. Something told him Hilda only pulled him in here at the spur of the moment for reasons unknown to him.

Experience says it’s a coin toss on whether it’s a good or bad thing.

“I’m afraid I won’t be much help on this task. I’ve never made flower crowns before.” Ashe admits, but Annette shoves a handful of flowers onto him anyway. The lost look on his face doesn’t go unnoticed.

“It’s actually pretty easy once you get the hang of it. Right, Mercie?”

Mercedes nods with a smile and she begins the instructions. “You just weave the stems together like this and keep connecting them as you go.”

Ashe tries to follow the instructions the best he can, and while his crown wasn’t the best looking out of the group it was the attempt itself that mattered. Or, that’s what he’d tell himself anyway. 

“Is this a hobby of yours?” 

“It started out that way at first,” Marianne says, looking as delicate as the flowers. “But Claude suggested we give them to the children of neighboring villages. It really made them happy so we’ve been doing it after every battle ever since.” 

It’s hard to mask the look of awe on his face, but Ashe has too much trouble hiding it. The idea that  _ Claude  _ wanted them to give children flowers as a possible sign of peace to cheer them up was really adorable to him, and enough for his heart to do a small flip.

Back then he would have loved the idea of getting flowers while living on the street. How happy his brother and sister would have been to keep something so pretty that he didn’t have to sell. 

“It’s a wonderful idea.” Ashe continues to do his best without another word, however his eagerness may have been the result of a messy looking crown. Inwardly groaning he went on to attempt two.

“Sooo, you and Claude have been super close.” Hilda playfully elbows him and it hits Ashe that perhaps he was dragged in here for gossip. Really should have expected this, but since it’s no secret that their a couple he feels less anxious about the topic. 

“Hilda you are hardly one to talk. Haven’t you and Marianne been the same way?” Annette points out and Hilda waves it off while Marianne sputters. Nice to know she was in the same boat as he was. 

“Claude swept him off his feet and kissed him right after we won the battle! It’s so strange seeing Claude be so romantic, but it’s so adorable seeing you two be so lovey dovey!” Hilda squeals and Ashe tries his best to keep up the best poker face he can muster up. A very red poker face.

“We were apart for five years, I guess it was to be expected,” Ashe chuckles. They didn’t need to know how much he was internally panicking during the battle. “Everything feels.. Better when he’s near. Words can’t really describe how much I missed him— and all of you while I was away.” 

“You’re such a sweetheart,” Hilda coos. “That goes both ways too! Claude was really distressed when you didn't show up to our reunion. It was kinda hard to tell, but I could tell he was trying to keep himself calm and collected for our sake.”

There’s a ping in Ashe’s heart by this new information that he’s not sure what to do with. The night of the reunion all Ashe recalls is heading to bed early, ignoring his herbal remedies and letting himself cry for once. 

It’s one of the many nights he hates to remember.

“I didn’t mean to worry you all.” Ashe closes his eyes feeling guilt seep in and is momentarily startled by a flower crown resting on his head. 

“We know it’s not your fault. All of Fodlan has been in chaos for the last five years. I’m just grateful that we’re all here again.” Mercedes smiles so gently that Ashe feels as if he can’t speak without getting choked up, so instead he smiles. It was okay to do so now, and without them being fake. No longer did he need to keep a mask up.

He was with all of his friends and they were safe now. War be damned, they’d make it through no matter what it’d take.

“I think it’s cute too,” Marianne pipes up and Ashe is more than happy about the topic change. “How you look at each other like you’re both each other’s whole world.” 

Between a topic that depresses him and one that flusters him he takes the latter. 

“..That’s because he is my whole world.” And yet he had enough courage to admit that. Actually he wasn’t afraid to admit how much he loved Claude. Apparently it was really obvious anyway. 

The following aww’s and coo’s were expected, but it still made his ears burn. 

Fortunately a knock on the door disrupts their gushing and Ashe feels a rush of affection seeing Claude standing at the door. Did he mention how happy he was to be here?

“I had a hunch Hilda roped you into this,” Claude shakes his head but smiles nonetheless. Ashe notices his eyes flicker to the flower crowns and back at him that has him quickly taking the crown off his head. “We managed to finish up right before dinner and I thought we could walk there together. Like we used to.” 

Ashe beams at this, nearly jumping up from his place on the floor and has to stop himself from rushing to Claude’s side. 

“They have stars in their eyes.” Annette attempts to whisper or tries to, but it’s audible enough for everyone to hear and to make things worse on them there’s giggling that comes after.

“I gladly accept, as long as we can hold hands on the way over.” Ashe says coyly and gives himself a mental pat on the back for not stuttering. Part of him wanted to ramble— to tell Claude how much he loves to do just about anything if it involved him, but thank the Goddess that he has enough willpower to hold his tongue.

Look at him, slowly being more composed.

“Why that’s an offer I can’t refuse.” Claude grins cheekily, taking Ashe by the hand and letting their fingers entwine like it’s the most natural thing in the world. 

Ashe looks back at the girls expecting them to follow but they remain seated and simply wave them off.

“We’ll catch up with you two later. Oh, and Ashe? Make sure to come back tomorrow evening to help us out again.” Hilda winks, idly running her fingers over a flower petal. It takes every ounce of him not to pull Claude out of the room, but it appeared Claude was just as eager to get out than he was.

What a life saver.

“I see you’re officially in the gossip group.” Claude chuckles at the groan he receives. He’s right though. While there were flowers and it was a wholesome cause it came with a side of gossip. “I have to admit you look even more  _ adorable  _ with flowers in your hair. I didn’t think it was possible but you pulled it off effortlessly.”

Ashe sputters, unable to make a coherent sentence on their way down to the dining hall.

*******

Claude filled him in about their food rations being low and how now that they had Judith they were back to not nearly starving, but he didn’t expect Claude would throw a feast.

“In your honor.” Claude whispered and winked at him. It was entirely unnecessary to him, because Ashe didn’t really feel like he deserved it. The guilt of being on the enemy side still lingers in his head. 

Yet his thoughts were rattled when Claude openingly kissed him on the cheek and scooted a filled plate over to him. Ashe was slowly learning Claude-talk so that probably meant, ‘get out of the swamp that’s your mind and enjoy.’ 

“..Is everything okay, Ashe? You keep staring.” Leonie says, eyebrows raised as if she were deciding what to think of his gawking.

He was only a few bites in, but the food was forgotten when he noticed again how incredible everyone looked. They were all grown up and  _ heroes—  _ how could he not look?

“My apologies. You all just look so.. So incredible!” Ashe exclaims happily. “I’m really honored to be fighting by your side.” 

“And it’s an honor to hear you sing our praises of how chivalrous we are.” Lorenz practically beams at this. With the shining purple armor and the rose attached to it he looked like an elegant knight.

“I was aiming for mercenary, but I guess the title of hero isn’t so bad.” Leonie grins, looking embarrassed by the compliment but takes it anyway. He can relate to that.

“I don’t know about that. Some of us still haven’t grown that much.” Ashe watches the exchange of a glare from Lysithea and the cheeky smile from Claude, but to his surprise a war of words doesn’t begin. Over food and fighting he can see why Lysithea would rather want to attend to the sweets. Again, he can strongly relate.

“I dunno, Claude. I think my muscles have grown over the years! Wanna touch em?” Raphael exclaims proudly. It reminds Ashe how much he missed his excited dog energy. 

“Maybe later Raph,” Claude says. “And don’t cut yourself short, freckles. I think you make for a dashing knight.” 

Ashe has to stop himself from choking and decides to hide his face behind his cup of water. One day Claude is just going to compliment and wink at him and then he’s going to end up having his heart stop. 

But his charm is one of the many things he loves about his liege.

“There’s no need to be embarrassed, Claude’s right after all.” Byleth says from beside him. It’s actually the first time he’s ever heard their professor speak during dinner time. Maybe he was opening up too after five years?

Ashe was wrong though. He can’t relate to Leonie when he’s so awful at accepting compliments. Maybe he was modest or bashful but neither were helping him. It reminded him of how much he liked being out of the spotlight.

“Maybe we can have some more bow practice together.” Ignatz, may the Goddess bless him, decides to save him with the topic change. They exchange small smiles and he feels eternally grateful towards him. 

“Ignatz is real good with a bow, he taught me some new special skills that I can teach you.” Cyril pipes up, sporting a smile of his own. It’s still hard to believe how much he’s grown up. And he’s an archer too! 

To him it’s exciting having more archers to train with. Maybe Bernadette would finally join them too..

The rest of the dinner is filled with chatter and it completely fills Ashe with nostalgia. Arguments, laughter and a little bit of food thrown. Just like back then.

***** **

The way back to their room is pretty peaceful, but awkward with a dozen eyes on them. The second Ashe got up Claude was taking him by the hand and lead him back to their room. 

In case he got lost, Claude said. 

..It was a joke, but Ashe knows his sense of direction isn’t always the best. 

Getting undressed and trying to ease himself being in bed with only some old Garreg Mach clothes Claude gave to him was a whole other thing. 

How many times did they share a bed again? Probably only a number of times; most of which were when it was too late and Claude was content bunking out in his bed. 

Ashe realizes now that may have just been an excuse to sleep next to his crush. Of course Claude planned it out like that. He didn’t know how the mind of a schemer worked anyway. But he was learning!

The moment Claude climbed into bed with him he didn’t waste any time wrapping an arm around him and pulling Ashe right by his side. During dinner Ashe thought they couldn’t sit any closer but once again Claude proves him wrong. 

“C’mon, tell me what’s happening in there.” Claude lightly taps Ashe’s head who smiles at this. “You’ve been more quiet than usual all evening.” 

“..Have I? While I was.. Away, I spent many days not uttering a word. I guess I got used to it, sorry.” 

Claude frowns and gently squeezes his shoulder. “That’s a bad habit of yours that I can definitely help you overcome.” 

Ashe giggles at the sloppy kiss Claude puts on his cheek and affectionately rolls his eyes. 

“There has been something on my mind actually,” Ashe swallows thickly, now finding his hands more interesting than the topic. “I’m sorry I broke our promise. We were all supposed to meet up and I.. I didn’t. Maybe I could have but Gwendal might have sent out a search party a-and I would have had to explain why I was running away and—“

“It’s alright, Ashe. Hey, stay with me.” Claude speaks calmly, rubbing small circles on his shoulder. Ashe didn’t realize it until then but Claude was trying to calm him down from an upcoming panic attack. It was hard not to think about what could have happened if he left and if he would have even made it to the monastery on his own. 

“You couldn’t show up, but you’re here, aren’t you? Obviously the Empire isn’t the most pleasant to deal with and I had a hunch you’d be back.” The confidence in Claude’s tone starts to put him at ease. “It may have taken a little longer than I thought, but now that I have you there’s no way I’m letting you go. Got it?” 

Ashe gives a short nod and wipes the tears from his eyes. It’s hard to speak when he’s afraid he might begin crying again.

“A year before I officially became the leader of the Alliance I was a worried mess about you,” Claude says, trying to smile his way through the story. “I heard about the fall of house Gaspard, but wasn’t told anything else on the matter. Judith saw right through my calm facade and actually sent out a soldier to check up on you. She didn’t tell me until he came back and said, ‘Your freckled little love interest is fine, boy. Quit fretting before you pace a hole in the ground.’” 

Ashe tries, and fails, to stifle a giggle at Claude’s poor imitation of Judith. She’d probably threaten him again if she heard the way he made her sound. 

It does however warm his heart how much Claude cared for him, and how Judith took a risk to send out a spy for Claude’s sake. By that time they were heavily guarded by the Empire and Ashe understands that it would have been suicide openly sending any troops into where he was stationed. 

“You’re not upset with me?” 

Claude clicks his tongue. “Of course not. I  _ might  _ hold a grudge against the Empire for keeping you away from me for so long, but now we can win this war. Together.” 

“Together.” Ashe softly repeats aloud and smiles at the kiss Claude places on his forehead. 

Ashe ends up nestling his head in the crook of Claude’s neck once they finally settle down for the night and Claude wraps a protective arm around him that makes Ashe feel the safest he’s ever been after five years.

It truly was great to be back. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn't even peak fluff, this is only the beginning 
> 
> Sorry for late-ish update! I'm still shooing away writers block which is making me all sluggish, but I'm really excited for an upcoming post in-game chapter because soon we're gonna meet you know who! I'll let me excitement fight away the writers block!
> 
> Thank you all again for reading, leaving comments & kudos!! <3


	34. To War

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers for in-game VW chapter 16

Waking up next to Claude is a true challenge. Ashe realizes that soon enough. 

At first he didn't necessarily mind. After all they were apart for  _ five whole years  _ and the company of his beloved was much appreciated. 

By week two Ashe fell into a comfortable pattern of finding his limbs tangled with Claude's or waking up to find Claude half on top of him or Claude pulling him into an embrace. 

All of which made Ashe giddy as could be, however today was important and unfortunately they couldn't lay in bed and sleep in like they both wanted to. 

Today was a mission. Ashe's  _ first  _ mission as an adult and on Claude's side. 

So his excitement was understandable, right? Not that he was particularly eager to go killing like some of his classmates, but they had a war to win. 

..And it was his first mission as  _ Claude's knight  _ so yeah he was pretty pumped about it. He could finally protect the one he loves and prove himself as a knight.

"Claude," Ashe says a little too excitedly, already sitting up in their bed as he gently shakes Claude's shoulder. 

Claude mumbles incoherently, wrapping his arms around Ashe and buries his face into Ashe's stomach. 

Ashe stills at this, feeling his heart flutter. 

"Claude, c'mon we've gotta get ready. Judith will wonder what's keeping us." Ashe presses. It's not the first time they've been late to a meeting, but this particular day was highly important. 

And he'd rather not have Claude announce to the whole army that he was preoccupied hugging the most precious knight in the army. Again.

Ashe may or may not have avoided most of his friends after that meeting. 

"Just a little longer.." Claude mumbled, tightening his hold on Ashe. Claude was by no means lazy, but it was hard to pull himself away from Ashe. The feeling was mutual, however..

"But we have a  _ really  _ important mission today!" 

Claude's only response is a loud sigh, followed by silence. 

"We can cuddle later and skip breakfast tomorrow to lay in bed all morning if that—" 

Ashe doesn't get to finish, but Claude is already reluctantly pulling away from him and giving him a peck on the lips. It would have lasted longer if Claude didn't pull away to let out a loud yawn. 

Ashe giggles, idly running a hand through Claude's messy bedhead. "That's what happens when you stay up late to stargaze." 

"At least I get to wake up to someone who's like literal sunshine." 

Ashe gapes at this, feeling the tip of his ears burn. 

Goddess he was even a smooth talker after just waking up. 

"C-come on," Ashe says, grabbing his necklace off the nightstand and beams down at Claude as he stands. "We've got a war to win together, don't we?" 

Claude's expression softens, eyes gleaming in a way that Ashe has come to love when it wasn't followed by mischief. 

"You're absolutely right, freckles." Claude hums, stretching and gesturing for Ashe to come over. "How about one more kiss before we hit the road?"

Claude winks and Ashe chuckles, rolling his eyes with as much affection that they could hold and complies.

He'd never tire of kissing Claude or his constant sweet talk. It was always so sincere and kind.. 

And once again Ashe finds himself smiling into the kiss.

***** **

What Ashe gathers is that their main objective is to secure the Great Bridge of Myrddin from the Empire. It sounds easy enough to do, even if some of the Alliance wasn't onboard with the idea or won’t told of it. Which is understandable. This was a chance Claude was willing to take.

Most likely because he was  _ beaming  _ with confidence. Again, something Ashe really admires about him.

For a moment Ashe watches Claude, who was currently explaining their positions (a brief rundown) and today's tactics to their army again.  _ His  _ army. 

It's strange to see Claude be the leader— well, their professor is right by his side, of course, but it's Claude who gets to guide their movements. 

A lot has changed since he's been gone. Yet as he looks around and sees no trace of worry on his teammates faces.. 

Ashe was finally seeing the better side of this war. About time, right?

"Claude?" Ashe hesitates. Claude wasted no time turning to him,  _ still  _ smiling despite the bloodshed about to befall on their enemies. "Where do you want me?"

Usually, in his experience, Claude or maybe the professor has always had him positioned out of harm's way or near a healer. Which as an archer he gets. But it's not what he wants. 

Well yeah, again of course he's not eager to kill. And he's spent far too long stationed in one place just to sit back and watch his friends pull their weight while he does.. Nothing. 

"You," Claude points and then gestures. "Are going to be right by my side. You are after all my knight." 

Ashe can't hold back the grin on his face, nor the eager nod he gives Claude before he's right next to the Wyvern that (he  _ still  _ can't get over) Claude rides. 

It makes warmth bloom in his chest everytime Claude refers to him as  _ his  _ knight and he knows Claude most likely knows how thrilled it makes him. 

Would explain why he constantly stated the fact. (Goddess, it's a  _ fact!)  _

There's no doubt he'd ever tire of hearing it. 

When the soldiers come into view there's something unpleasant that stirs inside of him. Ashe is unfortunately familiar with the feeling, one of which he spent many days getting over when the feeling was directed at Catherine.

However with her he could learn to forgive her, but with the Empire.. 

That was a whole different story. 

Ashe can feel his fist tighten. So many years he spent being on the  _ enemy  _ side, so many wasted days when he could have been helping rebel against the war or even just helping out those who got caught in the crossfire—

Yet he too was caught in the crossfire but at least he was given the option to live. 

Really though he wasn't living until he got that spark back from Claude and his friends. 

"Ashe," Claude addresses him, snapping him out of his spiraling thoughts. "Keep an eye out on any enemy snipers for me, okay?" 

"I've got your back." Ashe can feel himself smile along with Claude as he scans the area. At least Claude wasn't storming into the fight and was allowing Ashe to keep up with him. 

This was a surprisingly nice dynamic. While Ashe wasn't equipped with any other weapons he could still assist Claude with his bow. 

He took the ground, while Claude took to the sky and he could easily get rid of any potential threats to a flying unit. 

Ashe notes how their formation and paired units seem more strategized than he remembered. Probably from years of experience, but it really showed how much of a leader it made Claude. 

Raphael took the frontlines while Lysithea was positioned near him, Hilda was already swinging her axe to protect their professor, Leonie and Lorenz were taking care of reinforcements..

Everyone was so busy he could hardly keep up. 

“The declining Alliance will be finished if I kill you. The Empire will herald the new age!” Ashe grit his teeth. What a scum! Threatening his liege..    
  
Claude on the other hand looked hardly affected by it. “Only if you manage to kill me. Hm? What's that to the north? Looks like the home of another opportunistic noble is burning..”    
  
All blood and confidence seemed to drain from Acheron’s face. “That's... that's my castle! No!”    
  
“That's the declining Alliance at work, right there. Seems like you were facing the wrong way, Weathervane!”

It baffles Ashe that Claude took the time to directly  _ order  _ Acheron's castle to be burned down. Talk about going down in flames.

"He had it coming." Leonie looked as if she was stifling a laugh, along with half of their army. The other half was like him; so stunned they were speechless.

Claude didn’t waste any time getting rid of Acheron with the help of his bow an arrow. It was actually the first time today he’s seen Claude use his bow, opting to use his axe instead for this battle. Ashe briefly recalls Claude mentioning how much of a pain the guy could be so maybe he really did have it coming.    
  
Note taken  _ don't  _ mess with Claude. 

Er, not that he was going to anyway. Still a valuable life lesson for others or anyone who betrayed the Alliance.

Another observation amongst the chaos on the bridge was the fact that a few of their former Black Eagles classmates seemed uneasy about who they were fighting. 

So him, the other former Blue Lions and the Golden Deer picked up where they couldn't. 

They probably had some sort of connections to the current general they were facing, but it had to be done. 

Empire soldiers were dropping like flies with the arrows he shot and the lethal blows Claude took with his axe.

Demonic beasts were an absolute pain but the magic users were dealing with them again. 

..Even Raphael and Casper who took to physical force when it came to dealing with them. Again that  _ still  _ baffled him. 

Meanwhile Ladislava, one of Edelgard's most trusted generals was going against Claude. An even fight with the pair fighting within the sky. Wyvern vs wyvern.. She was so quick Ashe was nearly afraid he'd miss her.

But what he was most afraid of was the axe she threateningly swung Claude's way. He was doing his best to avoid her hits but he can only imagine it'd be a matter of time before she tired Claude out.

Cyril appeared beside him, sporting an uncharacteristic gentle smile for someone covered in minor scratches. "Let's finish this real quick."

Ashe gave a small smile in return, readying his bow. Now to just wait for an opening.. 

Waiting for Claude to swing wouldn't do, but she did leave herself open whenever she thrusted her axe downwards toward him. 

Ashe glanced at Cyril, who was looking at Ashe as if he was awaiting the sign to release his arrow. 

Claude swung, nearly hitting her. 

Almost…

Ladislava moved her wyvern forward following Claude and—

"Now!" Ashe shouted, releasing his arrow with Cyril, watching both arrows hit their mark and with a wince they watched as Ladislava fell off her wyvern with a scream. They were unsure if she was still alive until she could barely be heard uttering her last breath asking for forgiveness from the Emperor.

Claude on the other hand paid her no mind, just a mere glance but he was too busy looking down at him and Cyril with what he thought to be  _ pride.  _

Ashe flushed, turning to Cyril who was silently watching the exchange. 

"You're really great with a bow, Cyril." Practice was one thing, but seeing him in action? It was truly amazing. 

"Learned from the best." Which was a really vague answer, but Ashe can assume it was either Claude, Ignatz, Leonie, Bernadette, or Shamir.

While Ashe watched Claude dismount to speak with his classmates surrounding him, giving them all a victory speech and orders for their next move, Ashe couldn't help but feel his chest swell with pride. 

There stood Claude; healthy and breathing. Ashe made sure not to let any sniper, heck  _ anyone  _ allow harm to befall him. There wasn't even a scratch on him!

So it was okay to give himself a mental pat on the back, right? He succeeded his first mission as a knight! His liege was officially safe! 

Looking around none of his classmates seemed to have any major injuries either, only minor cuts and bruises inflicted upon them. Nothing a healer can't handle in his experience anyway.

The rest of their army was busy celebrating and cheering for claiming the bridge out of the Empire's grip. It really was great being back with Claude and everyone again..

It's been years since Ashe remembers the sweet taste of victory. 

"Ashe!" Claude's voice has him turning to the upbeat tone to find Claude clasping his shoulder and guiding him over to Byleth. "You're coming with me and teach. There's someone I want you to meet."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess who's back, back again
> 
> Seriously though, I sincerely apologize for about a month delay on this fic. I did have a lot of writers block going on but I also got discouraged from writing this. But part of me /is/ really determined to finish this fic because I do have a good bit planned out for future chapters (and the ending)! 
> 
> Also Happy Holidays everyone!! Thank you all so much for reading leaving kudos & comments, and again sorry for such the late update! Hope you all have a great winter break!


	35. Nardel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claude introduces Ashe to his retainer, Nardel and.. He's not what Ashe was expecting at all.

Ashe was a curious knight. 

Which really, is stating the obvious, but he was getting to meet someone who worked closely with Claude for who knows how long.

Claude seemed excited for him to meet Nardel, so he must have been pretty entertaining for Claude to like him. Goddess knows Claude wouldn't be excited for him to meet anyone strict, dull, or plain.

Okay, so maybe he was more excited than curious now. He can't really tell. The only thing he's sure of is that he's never been happier to be by Claude's side than he is now.

Claude was like his freedom. He could let loose, smile and joke around with him without worrying about what Claude may think of him.

By now he realizes Claude finds just about anything he does to be cute or charming.

That's.. Fortunate? He's not really sure if he should be flattered or not. 

However Claude was disappointed when he rode on his own horse instead of sharing with him. To quote,  _ "That’s a missed opportunity for you to be giving me the world's longest hug." _

Ashe tried not to laugh at that pout he received and he had to bite his tongue when Byleth gave him a sympathetic pat on the shoulder.

Again, he still can't believe Claude's officially a leader now.

Now that they were here Ashe had to stand guard outside the room, and frankly it was a little boring while Claude, Byleth and Nardel were discussing who knows what. At least a part of him felt honored by fulfilling a knightly duty.

After spending so many years on guard duty you'd think he was tired of it, but this time he.. He actually wasn't. He got to keep watch over the Alliance leader, who was also the one he loved most.

A knight  _ probably  _ shouldn't be getting butterflies on the job but he was going to start embracing that feeling. Now was the time to start looking on the bright side.

When the doors opened Ashe immediately moved out of the way and noticed Byleth had a strange expression on his face.

Okay, so that's pretty odd to witness.. Usually it was hard to read Byleth in general.

"How was your meeting?"

"It was.. Interesting." Byleth rubbed the back of his neck, face full of uncertainty. "Claude wants you to join them now."

Ashe watched Byleth excuse himself and he stared at the door with a tinge of nervousness; confidence forgotten. 

Was.. Was Nardel a force to be reckoned with? They must be to make Byleth look so  _ lost. _

Ashe's hand hovered above the door knob and he hesitated upon hearing hushed whispers, and not so quiet ones.

"Just.. Play nice with him, okay? He's been through a lot and for the love of the Goddess do  _ not  _ ask him if he wants to hear any embarrassing stories."

Loud, roaring laughter followed and Ashe took that opportunity to enter—

And when he finally saw Nardel he looked nothing like he had imagined or expected him to be. Not that he was judging, but Nardel didn't exactly look like the typical retainer. After he and his siblings lived with Lonato their retainer they lived with was much more formal compared to Nardel's laid back posture.

"So you're Ashe," Nardel grinned, for some reason looking absolutely delighted to meet him. Actually, that was pretty flattering. "Cla—  _ Master  _ Claude has told me all about ya!"

"Did he?" Ashe smiled softly at Claude who was looking pretty flustered for once. "Claude's never mentioned you before, so I'm happy to get to know you better."

"Master Claude that wounds me," Nardel sighed, a hand over his heart. "Were you by chance  _ embarrassed  _ by your favorite retainer?"

Claude doesn't answer and simply gave him a pointed look that spoke volumes.

"My deeply hurt feelings aside, I'm oh so very glad to match the face with all the stories I've heard about you, Sir Ashe!"

"Oh?"

"Oh  _ yes,  _ I've known Master Claude since he was a br— such a small, mischievous child," Claude could be heard groaning in the background. "Judith told me all about the freckled boy who had Master Claude positively  _ enamoured. _ I even believe your Master Claude's first love too! Isn't that precious?"

At first Ashe was trying not to laugh and now he was trying to cool his face down. That was a lot to take in, but the fluttering in his chest refused to still. 

"I could tell you so many stories kid." Nardel laughed, resting a hand on Ashe's shoulder. As flustered as he was he wouldn't mind hearing more about Claude's past. 

Now that he thinks about it there's not a lot he knows regarding that area. And well, it's probably the same for Claude too. Perhaps when they got back he'd open up more..

"But he's  _ not, _ " Claude intervened; his rosy red face matching Ashe's. "That's enough chit chat for today, Nardel. Actually that's enough for the rest of my lifetime." 

"Guess we'll put a bookmark here for today," Nardel sighed sounding oddly disappointed. Then again he looked like he was having the time of his life embarrassing Claude. "Stop by before you leave and I'll make sure to tell you some very  _ interesting  _ stories from Master Claude's childhood!"

Ashe let Claude take him by the hand and guided him out the door without another word. It was apparent he was in a hurry to get away from Nardel as fast as he could.

..There was a part of him that would have  _ loved  _ to hear those stories though. Perhaps another time.

"So we most definitely won't be doing that," Claude made a face and swayed their hands. "But it could have gone worse for me, I suppose."

"He's interesting for a retainer," Ashe chuckled. "You sure we can't stick around for a few more minutes?"

"Nope sorry, I have.. Important leader stuff that needs to be tended to."

Ashe wasn't convinced, but for Claude's sake he'd let it slide. They walked in comfortable silence down the hall; something that felt familiar and fond back in their days at the monastery.

"First love, huh?" Ashe asks, breaking the silence. As many people as Claude knows he was quite surprised to learn he was the first one.    
  
In fact he felt  _ honored.  _

Claude squeezed their hands together, a fond expression on him as he slowed down their steps and turned to Ashe.

Everytime he received such an affectionate look Ashe couldn't help but melt a little.

"I wouldn't have it any other way." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Claude: please don't embarrass me in front of my bf   
Nardel: Read 3:24 PM 
> 
> First off I just want to say thank you all so much for the support. Again, I'm sorry for the slow update, but after writing this chapter it gave me such a wave of affection for them and I've already got a bunch of notes written down for the next chapter! (Hint we're gonna get into some backstory) 
> 
> Also 700+ kudos!! Thank you all so much, I can't believe so many people ship these two! And to everyone who leaves comment sorry that it takes me 3,000 years to reply back, I usually like responding right before I update. 
> 
> Thank you all for the support, comments, kudos and for reading!! ♡ ♡ ♡

**Author's Note:**

> Had this idea for a month now and finally got to writing it, sorry if the beginning was rushed or slow! The tags will update with every chapter, thank you for reading!


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